(no subject)
So testing is coming up on the 1st...
I'm excited, but not nervous. I think I finally have a handle on this stuff to a point where I'm confident that, barring extreme stress or some other extenuating circumstances, I won't hurt anyone that I'm not supposed to and I will hurt the people that are supposed to be hurt. My sparring has become a lot softer with the kids, with more time taken to make slow, careful mistakes and judge them on their reactions. It's part of the teaching process I suppose; the things that I might point out are different from what Sifu would and so perhaps they will grasp something that they might not have otherwise. That is as much a part of the test as anything else, and so I have confidence in my ability to perform well.
Tiara has some serious test anxiety, which is not a good thing to find in someone testing for their black sash. It's a student black, rather than 1st degree, but that's still a couple of years out of my reach. Maybe it's just a question of youth and background (she's only 18 and she's done the whole tournament thing, which has its good and bad sides in developing skills), but I wonder if there's a mental component that will serve as the last barrier between where she is now and her 1st degree promotion. Don't get the wrong idea; I LOVE working with Tiara on anything and having her watch my back would certainly give me a feeling of safety, but there's something at a higher level that I'm not sure about. I find myself wondering if she could teach her techniques to other people, if she really gets all of this at that subconscious level where the mind makes the high level strategic decisions and the body simply responds automatically with the correct tactics and techniques. Or it could just be the early signs of performance anxiety that I'm seeing. In any case, I'm glad she's going to be testing at the same time I am. That should make things fun.
There's less people testing this time compared to last (the last one was 21 people, and this one is only 11 or 12), but I'm kind of disappointed that there's a lot of kids in this one, with myself one of only 2 adults, or 3 if we count Tiara. Other than Scott, I think I'll outweigh everyone by a good 50 pounds or so (Scott is bigger than I am by an order of magnitude. Make him fun to throw.). That means that, unless a lot of extra people show up for multiples, that part of the test may be far more about control than about the frentic test of awareness that it usually is. The kids are fun to play with, and working specific techniques with them is just fine, but they don't have that killer instinct yet and so they don't move as fast or with the same spirit that adults do. I feel like I need to remind them that they can't actually hurt me and so, when I say to throw that punch, I mean that I should at least get a bruise of some kind of I let it hit me full in the face. Undoubtedly, either Sifu has already thought of this and has some plan for it, or a few of the peple that I took down in multiples on the last test will show up for some payback and we'll get a chance to really play with a more serious energy. I'm sure I'll have lots to say afterward.
I'm excited, but not nervous. I think I finally have a handle on this stuff to a point where I'm confident that, barring extreme stress or some other extenuating circumstances, I won't hurt anyone that I'm not supposed to and I will hurt the people that are supposed to be hurt. My sparring has become a lot softer with the kids, with more time taken to make slow, careful mistakes and judge them on their reactions. It's part of the teaching process I suppose; the things that I might point out are different from what Sifu would and so perhaps they will grasp something that they might not have otherwise. That is as much a part of the test as anything else, and so I have confidence in my ability to perform well.
Tiara has some serious test anxiety, which is not a good thing to find in someone testing for their black sash. It's a student black, rather than 1st degree, but that's still a couple of years out of my reach. Maybe it's just a question of youth and background (she's only 18 and she's done the whole tournament thing, which has its good and bad sides in developing skills), but I wonder if there's a mental component that will serve as the last barrier between where she is now and her 1st degree promotion. Don't get the wrong idea; I LOVE working with Tiara on anything and having her watch my back would certainly give me a feeling of safety, but there's something at a higher level that I'm not sure about. I find myself wondering if she could teach her techniques to other people, if she really gets all of this at that subconscious level where the mind makes the high level strategic decisions and the body simply responds automatically with the correct tactics and techniques. Or it could just be the early signs of performance anxiety that I'm seeing. In any case, I'm glad she's going to be testing at the same time I am. That should make things fun.
There's less people testing this time compared to last (the last one was 21 people, and this one is only 11 or 12), but I'm kind of disappointed that there's a lot of kids in this one, with myself one of only 2 adults, or 3 if we count Tiara. Other than Scott, I think I'll outweigh everyone by a good 50 pounds or so (Scott is bigger than I am by an order of magnitude. Make him fun to throw.). That means that, unless a lot of extra people show up for multiples, that part of the test may be far more about control than about the frentic test of awareness that it usually is. The kids are fun to play with, and working specific techniques with them is just fine, but they don't have that killer instinct yet and so they don't move as fast or with the same spirit that adults do. I feel like I need to remind them that they can't actually hurt me and so, when I say to throw that punch, I mean that I should at least get a bruise of some kind of I let it hit me full in the face. Undoubtedly, either Sifu has already thought of this and has some plan for it, or a few of the peple that I took down in multiples on the last test will show up for some payback and we'll get a chance to really play with a more serious energy. I'm sure I'll have lots to say afterward.