(no subject)
I want out of this shitty life that i am leading i want to move on and grow up but i am to scared! i hate being alone, i feel like no one wants me around everyone is pushing me away! i try to go out and try new things and i get scared that that no one is going to except me or even like me! i am sick and tired of my mom mother putting that ass whole of a son that beats the fuck out of her before me and melissa! I graduated on sat. and she didn't get me anything or even act like she cared she was worried about when chris was and what he was doing! I WANT OUT
my grams sister died, my bestfriends dog got put down, and my moms bestfriends dad died all on friday what a great day that was!
this is how i picture my life: i keep walking and walking but i am getting nowhere
this other fear that i have and huantes me everynight is that i am going to lose kayleigh the most important part of my life! she is like a confort thing, its like i have to have her around to be happy, i feel like she is and only one who really cares about me and understands me. she knows what is wrong with out me ever saying anything. i have this connection with her that i have never had with another person! i know that i can't take her where ever i go to keep me happy and safe. even though it would be nice but she has her own life.