(no subject)
What a pathetic little show the Apprentice has turned into. And what a pathetic little man the Donald.
Sure, sixteen-odd self-righteous yuppies with bad grammar (apparently Ivy league universities don't teach one how not to use past form of an irregular verb with the perfect tenses) politely licking the ass of a successful egomaniac whose head looks like Chewbacca's crotch is a recipe for delicious cheese. Still, the first couple of seasons actually taught the masses something about selling stuff to others, be it warm lemonade, T&A, or luxury cars.
This season is a car wreck vaulting over the world ocean's population of sharks, sperm whales, and assorted crustaceans while masturbating with the severed head of a Playboy playmate.
Case in point: this Sunday's episode. Michelle tells the Donald (I'm translating here):
"Listen here, you gold leaf fetishist, I know I signed up to take part in your little quest for relevance and be humiliated for weeks on end in exchange for the chance actually to do those same things and get paid nice money for it. Still, trying to imply with your characteristic subtlety that normal lifestyle : your lifestyle is like living in a gaudy mansion : no running water? Is not worth my time. I have to go trim my cat's nails or something."
The Donald: "You little nothing. Do you know who I am? I have a golden star and while we're on that, did you point that out to the people on that tour task which I timed... uh, so fortuitously coincided with my placement in the Walk of FAAAME?
Michelle: "I am a well-mannered woman so I won't tell you what I did on the star while the driver was taking a leak in the nearby gas station."
The Donald: "Insolent worm. I will crush you now with a non-sequitury pugilist metaphore. Parry that!"
Michelle: "Hey, it's been nice but really need to go raid an orc party and raise my self-respect points. It's not you; it's me."
The Donald: "But you need to respect mah authoriteh. This show is my baby. I can't lose it to the bad ratings. Because losing is losing and if you lose you can't win and I always win. That's why I live in a place with golden doors and paintings of naked fat people frolicking. Please, don't leave, you quitter, don't leave me."
Yeah.
Sure, sixteen-odd self-righteous yuppies with bad grammar (apparently Ivy league universities don't teach one how not to use past form of an irregular verb with the perfect tenses) politely licking the ass of a successful egomaniac whose head looks like Chewbacca's crotch is a recipe for delicious cheese. Still, the first couple of seasons actually taught the masses something about selling stuff to others, be it warm lemonade, T&A, or luxury cars.
This season is a car wreck vaulting over the world ocean's population of sharks, sperm whales, and assorted crustaceans while masturbating with the severed head of a Playboy playmate.
Case in point: this Sunday's episode. Michelle tells the Donald (I'm translating here):
"Listen here, you gold leaf fetishist, I know I signed up to take part in your little quest for relevance and be humiliated for weeks on end in exchange for the chance actually to do those same things and get paid nice money for it. Still, trying to imply with your characteristic subtlety that normal lifestyle : your lifestyle is like living in a gaudy mansion : no running water? Is not worth my time. I have to go trim my cat's nails or something."
The Donald: "You little nothing. Do you know who I am? I have a golden star and while we're on that, did you point that out to the people on that tour task which I timed... uh, so fortuitously coincided with my placement in the Walk of FAAAME?
Michelle: "I am a well-mannered woman so I won't tell you what I did on the star while the driver was taking a leak in the nearby gas station."
The Donald: "Insolent worm. I will crush you now with a non-sequitury pugilist metaphore. Parry that!"
Michelle: "Hey, it's been nice but really need to go raid an orc party and raise my self-respect points. It's not you; it's me."
The Donald: "But you need to respect mah authoriteh. This show is my baby. I can't lose it to the bad ratings. Because losing is losing and if you lose you can't win and I always win. That's why I live in a place with golden doors and paintings of naked fat people frolicking. Please, don't leave, you quitter, don't leave me."
Yeah.