A memorial... of sorts
It's not often that I experience ghosts. Well, at least not lately. My 'walls' have not been kept up very well for these things and I seem to have a really difficult time during the summer. So I tend not to seek out trouble on my own. When out with Vampy, we would go ghost hunting just for thrills. About 60% of the time we would always find one and it would make for interesting journal entries. The other 40% of the time, weirdness would happen that usually involved Border Patrol depending on our choice of pseudo-destination. (We usually just "pick a direction" and go with it.)
Last evening I was playing Shaiya with Vorashal. Lights were out, as always, and the room was lit with nothing but the soft glow from my monitor. We had been talking about Chimae (Shee-may), my friend who I just found out had passed away. I was trying to think up a memorial for her. Well.. no.. actually I was putting it off because my mind was, and still is, reeling over the fact that she is really gone. I had found her online memorial and that just.. almost sealed it for me. I couldnt deny it anymore. It was there, right in front of my face. The conversation turned eventually, and soon was put to the back of my mind.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw this 'orb'. It wasn't bright at all. Just a circular lumpy looking ball. Kinda fuzzy. I tried to look at it, but it dissolved. I mentioned it to Vorashal and he said it was Chimae.. and I should talk to her. I continued playing my game in silence, while I searched for something to say..
Then I got dizzy. And it got cold. Despite the fact that it was 85 degrees, I had chill bumps. I couldn't breathe. There was this weight on my shoulders that was intense and painful. I tried to tell Vorashal what was happening but then the power went out, causing the room to fall into total darkness. I fumbled for my lighter and made my way to my shrine, all the while talking, and crying. Lit some candles and incense, though I was shaking so bad I was amazed I was able to do this, and sat on the floor trying to overcome the dizziness and the chills.
I don't know what happened after that. I woke up this morning, laying in front of my shrine with a small bottle of holy water in my hand. I don't even remember grabbing it.
So I guess, in a sense, this entry is a memorial to her. She always had a way of capturing my attention and even in her passing, managed to do so. Her time here was much too short..
May you rest in peace, love. You will most certainly be missed.
Dayna Tchao
September 02, 1990 - May 26, 2010
Obituary
Tomorrow is gonna make you cry
It's gonna make you kneel
Before it breaks you from inside
Still pressing on
Arm over arm
Still trying to get both feet back on to the ground
They are harvesting these fields in autumn
We're different now than when we started
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
There on the pavement, underneath the yellow moon
I think of you and just how easily we bruise
A folded address in my pocket, I have stopped
Trying to believe for you that the bottom didn't drop
I am on the platform, covered with dust
I pray they take the both of us, and
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
And I am ready to come down
And see us both somehow
On the beautiful side of somewhere, someday
Somewhere, someday
I am lighting matches for the rescue
Some are candles, some are fuses
Acting on my best behavior
Switching over every breaker
As we're plowing through these laws of nature
Disregarding every acre
I'm lying in my Sunday best
Assuming this was not a test, and
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
And I am ready to come down
And see us both somehow
On the beautiful side of somewhere, someday
Somewhere, someday
Beautiful side of somewhere.
Last evening I was playing Shaiya with Vorashal. Lights were out, as always, and the room was lit with nothing but the soft glow from my monitor. We had been talking about Chimae (Shee-may), my friend who I just found out had passed away. I was trying to think up a memorial for her. Well.. no.. actually I was putting it off because my mind was, and still is, reeling over the fact that she is really gone. I had found her online memorial and that just.. almost sealed it for me. I couldnt deny it anymore. It was there, right in front of my face. The conversation turned eventually, and soon was put to the back of my mind.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw this 'orb'. It wasn't bright at all. Just a circular lumpy looking ball. Kinda fuzzy. I tried to look at it, but it dissolved. I mentioned it to Vorashal and he said it was Chimae.. and I should talk to her. I continued playing my game in silence, while I searched for something to say..
Then I got dizzy. And it got cold. Despite the fact that it was 85 degrees, I had chill bumps. I couldn't breathe. There was this weight on my shoulders that was intense and painful. I tried to tell Vorashal what was happening but then the power went out, causing the room to fall into total darkness. I fumbled for my lighter and made my way to my shrine, all the while talking, and crying. Lit some candles and incense, though I was shaking so bad I was amazed I was able to do this, and sat on the floor trying to overcome the dizziness and the chills.
I don't know what happened after that. I woke up this morning, laying in front of my shrine with a small bottle of holy water in my hand. I don't even remember grabbing it.
So I guess, in a sense, this entry is a memorial to her. She always had a way of capturing my attention and even in her passing, managed to do so. Her time here was much too short..
May you rest in peace, love. You will most certainly be missed.
Dayna Tchao
September 02, 1990 - May 26, 2010
Obituary
Tomorrow is gonna make you cry
It's gonna make you kneel
Before it breaks you from inside
Still pressing on
Arm over arm
Still trying to get both feet back on to the ground
They are harvesting these fields in autumn
We're different now than when we started
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
There on the pavement, underneath the yellow moon
I think of you and just how easily we bruise
A folded address in my pocket, I have stopped
Trying to believe for you that the bottom didn't drop
I am on the platform, covered with dust
I pray they take the both of us, and
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
And I am ready to come down
And see us both somehow
On the beautiful side of somewhere, someday
Somewhere, someday
I am lighting matches for the rescue
Some are candles, some are fuses
Acting on my best behavior
Switching over every breaker
As we're plowing through these laws of nature
Disregarding every acre
I'm lying in my Sunday best
Assuming this was not a test, and
I am ready to wake up
There in the exodus
On the beautiful side of somewhere, baby
And I am ready to come down
And see us both somehow
On the beautiful side of somewhere, someday
Somewhere, someday
Beautiful side of somewhere.