The Importance of Real Names (DC Universe)
Title: The Importance of Real Names
Author: Wisiaden
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the DC universe.
Rating: T
Summary: Tim needs to work on his plans in rejecting one love sick Superboy because they aren’t working at all. Robin Reversal AU! Worship Universe!
Characters/Pairings: Tim/Kon, one-sided
Secondary Characters: Bruce, Damian, Jason, Dick, Alfred
Warnings: Mild cursing.
Author’s Note: For Meeya. Because she asked for more in this universe, and I don’t know how else to thank her for helping me. Oh, there’s a sort of drabble third piece to this detailing Superman’s reaction to this. That’ll be posted later this week.
-------
Tim knew he should have accepted the mission to Siberia, but he didn’t fancy going to another country so soon after returning from another. Not to mention, it was about time for Tim Wayne to make an appearance. However, right now, all Tim could think was, “I’m an idiot!” Bruce looked at him expectantly.
“Tim?”
There was no way Tim was going to train the Titans if he could help it. Not while Superboy was still there. The boy kept accosting Tim with his affections at every turn. Even Batman’s no meta rule didn’t deter him (“he’ll be my in-law one day, I might as well learn how to deal with him now” was Superboy’s attitude on that).
“Sorry,” Tim replied, flashing a smile. “I’m busy that day. Why don’t you ask Damian?”
Damian snorted from under the car he was repairing for Bruce. Bruce merely raised a curious eyebrow at Tim’s rejection.
“I suppose-“
“Tt,” Damian cut him off and rolled out from beneath the car. His face was sweaty and one side was smeared with grease.
“I’m not helping you out of your mess,” Damian informed Tim with a slight sneer as he wiped his hands with a towel.
“It’s not my mess or a mess,” Tim replied back. Damian tossed his towel into Tim’s face making him splutter.
“It is whatever you want to call it,” Damian said. He took a seat in front of the computer, leaning back, an amused look in his eyes. Bruce frowned.
“Did you get into trouble somewhere?”
“No,” Tim denied. He flushed. “It’s just-“
“He has garnered the affection of a Titan,” Damian explained. Bruce stared. “Does this have to do with Superboy deliberately ignoring my no meta rule?”
“I just don’t want to train the Titans,” Tim gritted out. He totally saw that twitch on Bruce’s lips. There was no way the man didn’t know about Superboy. He was sure Bruce was messing with him.
“I’m sure your boyfriend would love to see you,” Damian piped in.
“Shut up,” Tim said. He threw the towel back at Damian. Damian dodged it and smirked, “he was so happy about your date last week.”
“It wasn’t a date!” Tim groaned.
“Tt.”
“It wasn’t! He just-“
“Saved you from death at five thousand feet and gave you flowers? We know,” Jason added as he ambled into the cave. Tim gaped, “how do you know about that?”
Jason shrugged. “It’s not exactly news. All over the Superhero grape vine.”
Tim got the feeling Superman would be visiting him pretty soon to grill him over a non-existent relationship.
“Bruce!” Tim pleaded. Bruce had a look in his eye, and Tim knew he wasn’t going to like the answer.
“It’s a training opportunity,” Bruce said poker-faced. “You’re going.”
Tim choked. He just knew Bruce was in on it too.
“B-but I don’t want to.”
“Don’t want to what?”
Dick peered at them from his headstand. He had cart-wheeled into the room already dressed in his Robin costume. Jason looked at Dick slyly. Then he winked at Tim.
“Oh,” Jason said solemnly, “Tim can’t go train your team on Saturday. He has other things to do.”
Dick fell out of his handstand. “What? But Tim!”
Tim winced as Dick flung himself into Tim’s stomach. The kid was getting to be a heavy bundle of energy.
“Tim. Tim. Timmy. Tim! You promised! You said you’ll train us, remember?”
Dick pouted, pulling at Tim’s shirt. Tim sighed. He hated Jason. Hardly anyone could resist giving into Dick’s demands.
“I’ll go. I said I promised, right?”
Tim smoothed a hand over Dick’s hair, ruffling it gently.
“Yes!” Dick squeezed Tim hard. Then, he bounced off Tim’s lap and hopped excitedly in front of Bruce. “Can we go? Now?”
Bruce nodded. With that Batman and Robin went out to prowl Gotham. It left Tim free to glare as Jason.
“Do you want me to be a pedophile?”
Jason whistled.
“No,” Damian answered. “We trust you have enough sense to wait till he’s of age.”
Tim clenched his teeth. Those two…
“I’ll have your uniform pressed,” Alfred announced. He had a tray of sandwiches in his hands, having just caught the tail end of the conversation. Tim looked at him, puzzled.
“You must look presentable while being courted,” Alfred clarified. Tim dropped his face into his hands. His entire family, aside from Dick, was set on torturing him.
Tim was wary and skitterish on Saturday. But only Damian or Bruce might have picked up on it. They weren’t there. Tim kept himself as alert as possible. He arrived mid-morning, assisting with the Tower’s system maintenance. He’d be damned if anything happen to the place Dick spent his weekends. There was no Superboy in sight. That both relieved Tim and worried him. He wasn’t sure how to handle Superboy at all. How did he plan for this? An overtly affectionate meta? At four on the dot, Tim headed for the training room. He bumped into Superboy.
“Red!” Superboy greeted him enthusiastically. “You’re training us today!”
“Yes, I am,” Tim confirmed stiffly and was bowled into a super hug. He cursed inwardly. He had no kryptonite at all thanks to Damian (Tt-I will not have a family member ruin our established protocol of maintaining life). He patted the boy awkwardly.
“Can’t breathe,” he said gently.
“Sorry!” Superboy released him. “You know you can call me, Kon!”
“I’m aware of that, Superboy,” Tim replied. He strolled off into the training room without a backwards glance at the meta. He didn’t have kryptonite, but Tim was sure he had some creative exercises. He cackled to himself, planning out the gruesome drills that would make Superboy hate him. He was the all fearing Red Robin for god’s sakes!
Several horrifying hours later, Tim was pleased. Everyone was groaning in pain and tired to the bones. Only Dick was still tumbling about-Tim really didn’t know where the kid got his energy from.
“Good job,” Tim commented. “Take a shower. I’ll clean up here.”
Dick flipped over to Tim and hugged him. “that was awesome! I’m so glad you came!”
Tim smiled at him. “Go take a shower, Robin. I’ll talk to you after.”
Dick yelped in glee, hugged Tim again and skipped out. Tim heard Beast Boy grumble to Dick, “your brother is crazy. You’re crazy! Why?”
Then Tim surveyed the room and started picking up the equipment he had used. Tim sighed as he felt a presence behind his back. Superboy…
“Yes, Superboy?”
“That was whoa!” Superboy said.
“Hm,” Tim agreed. “That happens. You did pretty well. I’ll give you a harder exercise next time.”
He turned to Superboy who lighted up in a goofy grin. That was the wrong thing to say after Tim thoroughly ran Superboy through drills to make him hate him.
“Awesome!”
“Yeah,” Tim muttered quietly. He cleared his throat. “You can go clean up.”
“Uh…I’ll help you!” Superboy offered.
“I’m good,” Tim said curtly. “Thanks.”
Superboy didn’t move. Tim waited. He counted. One…two…three…
“Cashweonate?”
“What?”
“Can we go on a date after this?” Superboy repeated more slowly.
“No,” Tim refused. “I’m going to talk to Robin after this.”
“Tomorrow?” Superboy tried. “It’s Sunday.”
He looked at Tim, imploringly.
“We’re not even dating,” Tim replied.
“Aw-come on,” Superboy wheedled. He hovered in the air around Tim. Tim could see Superboy fidget, wanting to move closer into Tim’s personal space.
“You don’t want to date me.”
Tim resumed cleaning up.
“Why not?” Superboy circled him. Tim closed his eyes. That looked dizzying. He breathed in and out slowly.
“You don’t know anything about me,” Tim answered neutrally. Superboy just shrugged. “That’s okay. You’re a bat. I can live with that. Superman explained.”
And Superman was seriously going to kill Tim. He rubbed his temples.
“I’m a very bad man.”
“You’re Red Robin. You can’t be bad,” Superboy disagreed.
“I’m seeing someone,” Tim lied. All his plans were shitty. What happened to his brain? He needed to get out of here. Quick. Where was Dick? How long could a shower take?”
“Who?”
Superboy deflated. Yes, Tim cheered.
“Starfire.”
“Liar!” Superboy responded. “Robin said Nightwing’s with Starfire.”
Damn! Caught. Why would Dick tell the boy that? Tim supposed he needed to shock Superboy for a getaway. He hoped he didn’t regret this.
“I’m still not going out with you, Kon.”
Superboy froze in the air, shell shocked. Tim hurried. He was going to leave before Superboy’s came to and pulled him into an embrace he wouldn’t be able to get out of.
~Few days later~
Jason laughed, clutching his sides. Even Damian had a few chuckles in.
“It’s not funny,” Tim muttered. “I didn’t think calling him by his name would mean anything.”
“Oh, but it does,” Jason grinned. “Don’t you know only really close superheroes call and know each other by their real names?”
“Shut up,” Damian ordered. Tim didn’t dare think Damian was helping him. He was right as Damian continued, “It would be inconceivable for familial relations to be uninvited to the wedding.”
Tim hated them. He really did. Except Dick. Dick was sitting quietly at the table, doing his homework. Tim’s eyes narrowed. “Dick.”
“Yes?” Dick looked up sheepishly.
“You shouldn’t be texting while doing your homework,” Tim chided lightly. Dick sighed. “I know. I was just talking to Kon.”
“Really now?” Jason said, sensing an opportunity here for more teasing. “About what?”
“He wanted Tim’s email.”
Dick stowed his cell away and frowned at his homework. It was so boring. Tim, however, felt his heart stop.
“Did you give it to him?” He asked, horrified.
“No,” Dick answered. “I know I’m not supposed to give away our identities.”
Tim was relieved for a few seconds but Dick had to add, “I gave him the Alvin Draper email. Duh!”
Jason and Damian collapsed into laughter while Dick watched, confused. Tim slammed his forehead against the table. Plan. He needed a plan. To get rid of his admirer. A plan.
Superhero Worship A Blue Sky