Oct 01, 2005 20:47
"This isnt the end my dear
Of rainy days, of worried faces
Of lies and failed attemps
I died the day you left
And reminded everday
when you hang around here
in this sideways town
These drugs dont help
to curb my anxiety
Escpecially when your right here
sleeping next to him
All I can do is stare
Through the blackness
across the bodies on the floor
Im sorry If I stare
But he doesn't love you like I do
No one loves you like I do
Everyday a smile
like you never knew
how much I cared
But how the feeling changes
when you feel me getting close
Fiegned breath and heavy sighs
I'll never understand you
but thats alright
cause Im in love with your mysteries
Wouldnt you like a way out
of my affection
All I can do is stare
Through the blackness
across the bodies on the floor
Im sorry If I stare
But he doesn't love you like I do
No one loves you like I do
All you do is hurt
but I like the feeling
of broken hearts and backstabs
I know you hurt inside
cause he doesnt love you
maybe if you saw
me for someone else
You'd love me like I love you
my blood's' on your hands
but how much more
should I give in?
All I can do is stare
Through the blackness
across the bodies on the floor
Im sorry If I stare
But he doesn't love you like I do
No one loves you like I do
I need to run, I need to heal
thanks for killing me
and as you steal my breath
All I can do is stare..." (I called it kevin's song, now I dont know what to call it)
Thats something new I've been playing around with on guitar. Yeah, it's been awhile. I've been writing a play, although people keep telling me it isn't going to cut it and its not my ideas, I like it. Football is football, coach will never play me. But to tell you the truth I dont give a fuck, I get to play again. Thats what i wanted and I got it. I cant help but feel theses "attacks" are my fault. They(ergo the money mongering doctors) dont know whats wrong with me. I bet I could tell them. Homecomming is comming up. I dont want to go... but I going to. I hate that, the feeling that you have to do something you dont even want to do. No one wants to go with me anyways, and I cant think of anyone that I should put through the awful experience of going with me. I mean, considering... last years date ditched me half way through for a fag(no offense intended, he likes penis), the year before that decided to go out with me and then dumped me a few weeks later cause she found out how much of a crappy person I am, and lastly we come to the one that went crazy, I MEAN SHE WENT NUTS. So homecomming and me dont mix. But whatever, I need a good trip. Im tired of everyday.
drink a bottle or two of tequila, hit yourself on the head with a hammer, stand on a pool stick, then Watch fear and loathing in las vegas...
welcome to my life