Jan 25, 2004 21:54
i keep thinking that i could have done something different to keep my friends..and to keep my life the way it was a few months ago. even though its the past i cant seem to let go of the fact that i pretty much gave up a best friend, gained one at the expense of another, and ended up with no one in the end...if i could just go back to the summer...i was so happy when i went to alaska, i mean i went there, it's beautiful, i love visiting my aunt and uncle and cousins, i met a wonderful friend while there, then i came home to my friends here and everything was fine, but it slowly crumbled beneath me. there are so many things that i regret..so many things i wish i could change...and for some reason, im standing here in the background of everyone else, watching as they slowly drift from me, and i still stay close in hopes that our friendship will return and everything will be happy again. but reality is that that wont happen. ive just got to face the fact that that's the way things are now. sarah's left in the shadows of everyone else, unable to move forward, unable to let go..unable to feel anything..numb in pain and lost in regrets
not that you would care anyways