fuck fuck fuck im pissed
My mom and I just got into another fight. This one was bad. I'm so pissed, I just don't know what to do. She just left. She gets to go out and spend our *keyword OUR* money and go gamble. That is such bull shit. I got mad at her about that and we fought about it. I don't understand how she can take 10$ and go to a casino and spend fucking 4-5 hours there. And spend no more than 10$. That is so fucking fucked up. Christ I hate her like no other. She's mad at me cuz I want a certain pair of jeans!!! shit I'm not gonna wear jeans that ..wow get this 'DON'T FUCKING FIT ME!' she is so upset about money it makes me want to puke. She's never happy. A lot of people get by with less than what we have and they get by with just their family and love for eachother and all that. My mom can't get by with just me and be happy. I guess I'm just not good enough for her or something. We fought about so much stuff...and none of it is going to change. She's never going to change. She's always going to be unhappy. I don't know how it's affecting me so badly though. I hate her. I hate coming home in the afternoon to see her. I hate everything that she does. I hate her lying to me about money, and I hate the fact that she bought this house and is blaming me that we don't have anymore money. My mom talks to me about money and then when I question what she's doing it she gets all fucking pissed off at me and says "I'M DONE TALKING ABOUT IT!" and walks out of the room and slams the door. Well fucking excuse me for questioning what the hell you're doing with all this god damn money that we supposidly DON'T HAVE. I hate her. I hate this whole thing. I hate my life. I seriously can't take this anymore. I'm only 14 I shouldn't have to deal with this kind of thing. I can't take it anymore. I just can't. Please just take me from this place now before I kill myself trying. My god damn mom on top of everything else in my life makes it unbearable. She gets to go out and gamble when she's upset. I get to stay home while my soul rots. She gets a bunch of people to be on her side about everything, and gets comforted by people, while no one wants to accept the way I feel and I have no one to comfort me. No one. God I can't take it anymore I'm sick of crying about it. I'm crying right now. I just want to run away and stay away and make her worry about me. Fuck her. Fuck everything.