Mini Breakdown
I experienced a very mini nervous breakdown earlier today. I couldn't stop shaking, and a couldn't talk in complete sentences. It was kinda scary, but I had my mom with me.
The breakdown started because lately I've been feeling different. I know I am short, and I've come to accept that. it's just been really hard to accept the rest of my body. Such as my breast. They are huge. They would be big on a normal sized person, but on me, they are just in the way. I am a bridesmaid in Steph's wedding, and I went to pick up my dress today at Irini's (NEVER GO THERE, THEY GIVE HORRIBLE SERVICE AND ONLY TAKE CASH!) The dress is gorgeous, and I love it. Problem is that my boobs are too big for it.
I'm so glad that I had taken my mother there with me because I wouldn't of known what to do. She calmed me down, and I didn't cry which was a plus. But then her and Irini got into this big fight, and my mom was telling her that she should've guided me to the better size, and that she's had her business for so long that she should know which companies have smaller cup sizes. So basically my mother was in the right, and Irini was just being a bitch.
To order a new dress it would take three months, so I couldn't do that. Then she said we could add the straps, but I don't want to be different from everyone else! I don't want to stand out as the girl with the huge boobs. All of the other bridesmaids are skinny, and small. I hate being different and big. But it does fit better with the straps, so my mom is going to sow them on. I called Steph and she said that she didn't mind if I had straps and everyone else didn't. I just feel like I'm ruining her wedding. I feel like its my fault that the dress doesn't fit.
After we left the shop, we went and got something to eat, and I just couldn't stop shaking. My mom kept on trying to comfort me, but I was just so upset. I really wish that I could say five hours later I felt better, but I really, I'm still upset.
We went and got some bras that make my boobs a little smaller, so it helped even more. But still I feel horrible about everything.
Hopefully I feel better tomorrow.
The breakdown started because lately I've been feeling different. I know I am short, and I've come to accept that. it's just been really hard to accept the rest of my body. Such as my breast. They are huge. They would be big on a normal sized person, but on me, they are just in the way. I am a bridesmaid in Steph's wedding, and I went to pick up my dress today at Irini's (NEVER GO THERE, THEY GIVE HORRIBLE SERVICE AND ONLY TAKE CASH!) The dress is gorgeous, and I love it. Problem is that my boobs are too big for it.
I'm so glad that I had taken my mother there with me because I wouldn't of known what to do. She calmed me down, and I didn't cry which was a plus. But then her and Irini got into this big fight, and my mom was telling her that she should've guided me to the better size, and that she's had her business for so long that she should know which companies have smaller cup sizes. So basically my mother was in the right, and Irini was just being a bitch.
To order a new dress it would take three months, so I couldn't do that. Then she said we could add the straps, but I don't want to be different from everyone else! I don't want to stand out as the girl with the huge boobs. All of the other bridesmaids are skinny, and small. I hate being different and big. But it does fit better with the straps, so my mom is going to sow them on. I called Steph and she said that she didn't mind if I had straps and everyone else didn't. I just feel like I'm ruining her wedding. I feel like its my fault that the dress doesn't fit.
After we left the shop, we went and got something to eat, and I just couldn't stop shaking. My mom kept on trying to comfort me, but I was just so upset. I really wish that I could say five hours later I felt better, but I really, I'm still upset.
We went and got some bras that make my boobs a little smaller, so it helped even more. But still I feel horrible about everything.
Hopefully I feel better tomorrow.