I need a "Ask Dr. Stupid" icon
I'm constantly feeling too tired to type lately. To do anything. And it's not even that i've been busy. Cuz i'm only going to school 8hrs a week, then work 12hrs a week. Oh well.
House: I felt brain cells dying.
--STORY ONE:
Patient: I'm totally spazzing and having heart attacks when my female firefighter coworker comes in the room.
Female Firefighter Coworker (FFC): I am extremely meek, always need saving on the job, and i weigh 90lbs.
Smart Audience Members: WTF?
Cameron (aka Dumb, nosy, hypocritial, bleeding-heart, got-her-degree-cuz-she-cried-for-it Bitch): Maybe you're suddenly allergic to FFC. [test] Nope.
Patient: I love FFC. But i can't tell her cuz she's engaged to my brother. Woe.
Cameron: OMG you're totally suffering from a broken heart! This explains EVERYTHING!
Smart Audience Members: WTF? People with broken hearts give up on living and eventually die from stress/neglect. It does not cause heart-attacks, sporadic temperature changes, and sudden aggression.
Me: Also? Stupid as hell. Slap Patient's face, tell him to grow a pair and move out of the state if it bothers him so much.
Cameron: So we're going to shock his brain until he has no memories for his whole entire life. No childhood, no family, no friends, no nothing. For the rest of his life he will struggle with not knowing his past when everyone around him does. So he can get over ONE chick. We cool?
Everyone: [takes stupid pills] Sounds totally ethical to me.
Patient: [ZAP] I remember nothing. This is really depressing.
Cameron: He'll need his brother's support a lot. I know this is bad timing with the wedding and all, but...
FFC: What wedding?
Cameron: You're engaged to his brother, right?
FFC: Engaged? We don't even date.
So something ELSE was wrong with the patient and one of the effects was false memories. Which means Cameron ZAPPED this guy's whole life away forever for NOTHING! And will she get sued? Get reprimanded for malpractice? A shake of the finger? NO!!!!! I HATE LIFE!
STORY TWO:
House: I'm going to rehab. No more Vicodin.
Everyone: LOL
House: I'm serious.
Everyone: LMAO
House: [in rehab]
Scary Rehab Nurse: [grunt]
Everyone: [shat bricks]
House: Wilson, you didn't rat me out. You did what you did to help me.
Wilson: Wait, are you apologizing?
House: You want me to stop?
Wilson: Nono, go on.
Cameron: You apologized to Wilson? [hugs House long and inappropriately]
House: [coughs and makes her let go]
Me: WTFx100
House: [in court] I'm totally acting like my bastard self because apologizing and getting into rehab isn't what the Cop wanted.
Cop: I have issues with someone from my past who was an addict. And Daddy never hugged me.
Cuddy: [totally lies on the stand]
Judge: Dr. House you are a horrible person. But i hate Cop more! Cop, you seriously need to stop bringing "mean" people to my courtroom because they stuck something up your ass. Maybe if you relaxed your colon once in a while. House, you're free to go.
Cop: House, good luck.
Wilson: I brought you your rehab pills.
House: They from my scary rehab nurse or the pharmacy?
Wilson: Scary rehab nurse. Why?
House: [downs them]
Wilson: THAT'S VICODIN! So all this was for nothing?!
Audience: This whole long, drawn-out, boring, aggravating, emo plotline was for nothing??!
House: Yep.
Audience: DX
I hadn't gone to Youtube for the whole month of December, but i caught up on what i missed a couple nights ago. Wow. I missed nothing. Sad.
I have to pack up most of my room this weekend. This means my shrine is coming down, yo. A moment of silence.
Hey Amy, i've been up since 9am. Booooooored.
House: I felt brain cells dying.
--STORY ONE:
Patient: I'm totally spazzing and having heart attacks when my female firefighter coworker comes in the room.
Female Firefighter Coworker (FFC): I am extremely meek, always need saving on the job, and i weigh 90lbs.
Smart Audience Members: WTF?
Cameron (aka Dumb, nosy, hypocritial, bleeding-heart, got-her-degree-cuz-she-cried-for-it Bitch): Maybe you're suddenly allergic to FFC. [test] Nope.
Patient: I love FFC. But i can't tell her cuz she's engaged to my brother. Woe.
Cameron: OMG you're totally suffering from a broken heart! This explains EVERYTHING!
Smart Audience Members: WTF? People with broken hearts give up on living and eventually die from stress/neglect. It does not cause heart-attacks, sporadic temperature changes, and sudden aggression.
Me: Also? Stupid as hell. Slap Patient's face, tell him to grow a pair and move out of the state if it bothers him so much.
Cameron: So we're going to shock his brain until he has no memories for his whole entire life. No childhood, no family, no friends, no nothing. For the rest of his life he will struggle with not knowing his past when everyone around him does. So he can get over ONE chick. We cool?
Everyone: [takes stupid pills] Sounds totally ethical to me.
Patient: [ZAP] I remember nothing. This is really depressing.
Cameron: He'll need his brother's support a lot. I know this is bad timing with the wedding and all, but...
FFC: What wedding?
Cameron: You're engaged to his brother, right?
FFC: Engaged? We don't even date.
So something ELSE was wrong with the patient and one of the effects was false memories. Which means Cameron ZAPPED this guy's whole life away forever for NOTHING! And will she get sued? Get reprimanded for malpractice? A shake of the finger? NO!!!!! I HATE LIFE!
STORY TWO:
House: I'm going to rehab. No more Vicodin.
Everyone: LOL
House: I'm serious.
Everyone: LMAO
House: [in rehab]
Scary Rehab Nurse: [grunt]
Everyone: [shat bricks]
House: Wilson, you didn't rat me out. You did what you did to help me.
Wilson: Wait, are you apologizing?
House: You want me to stop?
Wilson: Nono, go on.
Cameron: You apologized to Wilson? [hugs House long and inappropriately]
House: [coughs and makes her let go]
Me: WTFx100
House: [in court] I'm totally acting like my bastard self because apologizing and getting into rehab isn't what the Cop wanted.
Cop: I have issues with someone from my past who was an addict. And Daddy never hugged me.
Cuddy: [totally lies on the stand]
Judge: Dr. House you are a horrible person. But i hate Cop more! Cop, you seriously need to stop bringing "mean" people to my courtroom because they stuck something up your ass. Maybe if you relaxed your colon once in a while. House, you're free to go.
Cop: House, good luck.
Wilson: I brought you your rehab pills.
House: They from my scary rehab nurse or the pharmacy?
Wilson: Scary rehab nurse. Why?
House: [downs them]
Wilson: THAT'S VICODIN! So all this was for nothing?!
Audience: This whole long, drawn-out, boring, aggravating, emo plotline was for nothing??!
House: Yep.
Audience: DX
I hadn't gone to Youtube for the whole month of December, but i caught up on what i missed a couple nights ago. Wow. I missed nothing. Sad.
I have to pack up most of my room this weekend. This means my shrine is coming down, yo. A moment of silence.
Hey Amy, i've been up since 9am. Booooooored.