Done with it all...
Im starting to find myself growing more & more paranoid to what I do... And who Im with, especially guys. Im a HUGE flirt, but latley I find myself panicing ever since that gay incident... I don't know about anything anymore.... Its been along time since I've talked to so many people, and when I think one of them is ALWAYS there for me, I find that really, they aren't.
Devin. [My ex] Started talking to me again :/ kinda scary.... I still love him, But I've slept with how many guys since him?? And done how much stupid shit? Damn it. I hate life.
My mom is driving me nuts, I can't have a lock on my door, when I have my gf over, I can't close the door, even though she has no knowledge that were together.... but Idk what her fuckin problem is anymore. Im SO not a virgin, but I kinda wish I was....
Two miscarriages and I don't think I can get pregnant. Kinda sucks to know. Considering I absolutly love kids...
On top of all that... Im fructouse in tollerent.... Basically. I can't eat or drink.
Oh man. Life. Love. HATRED. Gay as hell...
Im practically giving up and giving in on everything....
I recently O.d'd on Vicodin. But good news... I havn't smoked ANYTHING in two weeks moreor less.... Plus after getting kidnapped and raped and getting vodka struck down my nose && throught.... Im done with drinking....
My parents are seriously butt hurt cuz I won't go to church.... How gay. They know I don't wanna meet any new people.... And they Know Im not a churchy gurl.... So why do they insist on even trying? I'd rather choke myself to tell you the truth. Lame lame lame.
Atleast I got my gf, and my best friends... I love them.
But. Im loosing faith more & more each day. Someone needs to help keep me occupied before I do anything stupid, and regretful.... seriously.... soon.
:'(
Devin. [My ex] Started talking to me again :/ kinda scary.... I still love him, But I've slept with how many guys since him?? And done how much stupid shit? Damn it. I hate life.
My mom is driving me nuts, I can't have a lock on my door, when I have my gf over, I can't close the door, even though she has no knowledge that were together.... but Idk what her fuckin problem is anymore. Im SO not a virgin, but I kinda wish I was....
Two miscarriages and I don't think I can get pregnant. Kinda sucks to know. Considering I absolutly love kids...
On top of all that... Im fructouse in tollerent.... Basically. I can't eat or drink.
Oh man. Life. Love. HATRED. Gay as hell...
Im practically giving up and giving in on everything....
I recently O.d'd on Vicodin. But good news... I havn't smoked ANYTHING in two weeks moreor less.... Plus after getting kidnapped and raped and getting vodka struck down my nose && throught.... Im done with drinking....
My parents are seriously butt hurt cuz I won't go to church.... How gay. They know I don't wanna meet any new people.... And they Know Im not a churchy gurl.... So why do they insist on even trying? I'd rather choke myself to tell you the truth. Lame lame lame.
Atleast I got my gf, and my best friends... I love them.
But. Im loosing faith more & more each day. Someone needs to help keep me occupied before I do anything stupid, and regretful.... seriously.... soon.
:'(