Fic: Incessantly Red, Almost Never Blue

Aug 19, 2012 20:10

Title: Incessantly Red, Almost Never Blue 
Author: winters_empire
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters/Pairings: Narcissa Malfoy, James Potter, Lily Evans, Severus Snape (brief appearance), Narcissa/James, James/Lily
Summary: His favorite color was red. So she painted her lips red. But it could never be the right shade. One-Shot. AU. 
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.






**

Narcissa Black had been four the first time she met James Potter. He had looked at her oddly as she smoothed out her favorite light, blue dress, with the utmost care.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” she asked him.

“I don’t know,” he responded. “I suppose it’s ok.”

“Mother, tells me it brings out the color of my eyes,” she told him, and looked up at him expectantly, her blue eyes wide for him to see.

He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t really fancy blue. I prefer red.”

She drew away, startled, before she narrowed her eyes at him. Scrunching up her nose, she walked away.

James blinked and stared after her.

**

She was on her way back from the loo when his compartment door opened. Her cousin had been the one to open the door, but her eyes had been immediately drawn to the boy over his shoulder.

James was lying back in his seat. He was wearing a red, knit, sweater, and red and gold scarf that hanged loosely around his neck.

“Cissy,” her cousin greeted her, causing James to lift up his head.

Their eyes met briefly before Narcissa looked away. “Sirius,” she replied just as civilly.

James rose from he seat and took a few steps toward them. “Cissy?”

Narcissa shifted her gaze back to James. He was grinning at her, and she felt as if he was mocking her.

“Narcissa,” she corrected him, rather indignantly. “And that’s a rather horrid jumper you’re wearing. Hoping to be sorted into Gryffindor, are you Potter?”

“Where dwell the brave at heart,” James said confidently. “Just like my dad. I wouldn’t want to be sorted anywhere else. ”

“I’ll be Slytherin,” she told him with as much certainty as he had.

Sirius scoffed at her answer but Narcissa ignored him. She was looking at James, who was looking right back. Neither one of them was smiling.

**

“Evans, Lily.”

Narcissa should have known then, as she watched the girl take her place upon the stool. The girl, who upon turning to face the Great Hall, dazzled every one of them with her green eyes, a pair lustrous emerald jewels. But the thought didn’t occur to her. She simply assumed James was taken by her eyes like the rest of them, and not by her dark, red locks.

**

Their eyes would meet. He would grin, and she would turn up her nose. When he looked away, her lips would twitch into a small, secretive smile.

It was their routine.

But things never stay the same.

Their eyes would meet by chance. He would smile cheekily, and she would turn up her nose. When he looked away, his gaze would be drawn to redhead sitting in front of him, where it would remain until the end of the lesson. She would frown, and the grip on her quill would tighten.

The seed of change had been planted, and it was blooming rapidly.

**

The summer before her fourth year, her sister Andromeda left. She had watched her sister waved her wand frantically about her room, packing.

“Dromeda, what are you doing?” she asked in alarm.

Dromeda didn’t even turn to look at her as she continued with her task. “I’m sorry, Cissy. But I can’t stay here. You heard what they said.”

“You don’t have to leave!”

Dromeda lowered her wand, and turned to face her. “I do…I want to.”

“Don’t be an idiot,” Cissy hissed, “That mudblood is not worth choosing over your own family.”

Her sister’s eyes narrowed, and Cissy could feel her anger as she came towards her that for a brief moment she thought Dromeda might strike her. However, Dromeda firmly took hold of her chin, and glared at her briefly before her gaze softened.

“I’m going to marry Ted Tonks,” she told her. “I love him. I know I’ll be happy with him.”

And as Dromeda continued to stare into her eyes, Cissy squirmed uncomfortably, fearing her sister could see through her.

“This is my chance,” Dromeda continued. “It’s my chance at happiness, and I’m taking it. You should take yours, dear Cissy.”

Hours after she had gone, Narcissa had laid wide-awake in her bed. “My chance?” she whispered to herself.

**

“You look lovely,” her roommates had told her.

However, as she stared at her reflection, her blue eyes looking back at her, she felt unsatisfied with her appearance. Her elegant robes, though hugging her body nicely, were the same color as her eyes. She wished they were different, but they could never be the color she wanted them to be.

Turning away from the mirror, Narcissa noticed the red rouge left on the nightstand. She almost walked away from it, but she picked it up and stood before the mirror again. She gently, but heavily, applied it to her lips.

Red was James’ favorite color.

**

It became a habit, applying the rouge. His eyes were continuously drawn to her lips. She would smirk any time she caught him. It was a habit she was happy to keep.

**

She hadn’t noticed him as she walked briskly down the hall, whispering, “Men are such cowards.”

Perhaps, for the first time, she might have walked passed him without notice, if he hadn’t suddenly pulled her into small space behind one of the statues, pressing her against the wall, his hand covering her mouth.

Startled, she stared at him wide-eyed for a few moments, not believing she was seeing him. Yet, the feel of his messy strands prickling her forehead and his warmth breath against the ridge of her nose told her otherwise. His face was so close to her own that she could see the mirth in his eyes shining through his glasses.

Once out of her daze, she glared at him and protested against his hand on her mouth. He shushed her and pointed towards the opening of their hiding place, where she saw two individuals walk pass the statue. Prefects.

She kept still, and masked her face with a scowl as she kept her gaze on him. He in turn, also kept his eyes on her, grinning at her.

After the prefects had gone, she shoved his hand away, her red lips, un-smudged, there for him to see. And stare he did.

She smirked. “Do you dare, Potter?”

His grin fell off his face, startled at her words, and he simply gaped at her.

His silence suddenly made her afraid, afraid of rejection, and Narcissa blurted the first thing that came to mind, “As if, Potter. Not in this lifetime!”

She pushed him off, and walked back out of into the hall.

**

Their eyes rarely met anymore.

She would watch him follow Evans like a lovesick dog, and the sight would make her stomach turn, that she didn’t stare for long.

She wouldn’t notice that when he watched her, he no longer grinned, but instead had an odd look in his face, unknown even to himself, with a hint of longing.

***

Seventh year came. James and Lily were made Head Boy and Head Girl.

It was only a matter of time now, Narcissa thought bitter, as she watched the show from the sidelines.

***

It wasn’t until March that they countered each other alone. It was in that same hallway, near that same statue, but neither was aware of this.

They simply stared at each other, unsure of what to say.

Narcissa wanted to tell him that he looked better, and that she was glad of it. She wanted to tell him she was sorry for the loss of his parents, and that she genuinely meant it. She wanted to tell him that she wished she had been there for him, instead of Evans, because she…she…

“It’s my chance at happiness, and I’m taking it. You should take yours, dear Cissy.” Her sister’s words echoed in her head.

“I’m engaged,” she blurted.

James blinked at her in surprise.

“To Lucius Malfoy,” she elaborated, “After I graduate.”

“Oh. Congratulations.”

Narcissa should have expected as much. She had missed her chance. However, she couldn’t help but be angry, angry with herself and with James. Why hadn’t James taken the chance? Unthinkably, she drew her hand back and brought it forward, strongly against his cheek.

James stumbled back, stunned by the slap. He then glared at her, and was about to demand an explanation when he noticed the tears at the corner of eyes. Those eyes, blue as the sky, big and innocent as he had first seen them, rendered him silent.

He had once told her he preferred red to blue, but for the first time, her red lips went unnoticed by him. Even when he reached for her, and pulled her in, her eyes drew his attention. He kissed her then, gently and chastely, relishing the soft feel of her lips, caring less about their color.

**

Narcissa rushed into the girl’s lavatory and stopped before the sink, staring at the red, red lips in her reflection. She rubbed them clean but her exertion left them swollen, and stained in residue.

**

They didn’t kiss again. Their first had been their last.

But they met again. Just them.

“I’m going to ask Lily to marry me,” James told her.

“Oh. Congratulations.”

Seventh year was at its end.

**

Dark, heavy clouds covered the sky, emitting the promise of rain. Narcissa held her cloak tightly around her, concealing her face. Next to her was Severus Snape, dressed just as covertly. They stood in silence without acknowledgement.

He was the first to apparate away, and she soon followed.

Amongst the abundance of flowers already placed over the graves of James and Lily Potter, a singular red rose, and a lone lily flower materialized.

**

Narcissa sat at her vanity applying the red rouge to her lips. When she finished, she stared at her reflection. She noted for the first time, her lips were the color of blood. Bloody red. She would wear it always.

The End.

character: lily evans, character: narcissa malfoy, harry potter, character: james potter, fic

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