Time To Write About The Inevitable....

[winterrose]

Oh, you, my beloved fans.... If only you could see me now. I'm sitting at home, my eyes are all red and puffy, my chest hurts, and I feel nauseous. It's been 4 days since I found out about J.C. I can't help but think it's my fault he's dead. I mean, I'm the one he wanted, I'm the one who could have made everything so much better for him. Maybe he would have kept all the promises to me, maybe he wouldn't have hit me anymore. But something inside me said that he would, so I wouldn't go back to him. But I don't have another chance to make everything right, now. He's dead now. He killed himself. I can't stop thinking that it's my fault. If only I had done something differently. I found out that he was the one saying all those nasty things in Robi's guestbook. I wish he hadn't been so demented towards the end. I wish he had never done that. It puot such a horrible strain on Robi's and my relationship. Thank God we're friends again, now. Even thought we both said such horrible things to each other, I'm always going to love Robi. I know that. He was the first guy to treat me like such a princess, even if he didn't mean it. Yeah, Robi could be a dick sometimes, I'm not trying to defend him from that, but there were times when he could be really sweet. Like at Ed's house that one night when he was pleading for me to stay with him there. No one ever did that for me before. But back to the subject at hand... Justin Charles McKlosky is dead, and I feel as though it's all my fault. What a horrible feeling, to feel responcible for the end of another human life. Well, I have to go. TTYL. LYLs, bye byes.
<3
WinterRose