(Untitled)
2010 Winter Games Kink Meme
Part 2
I never really expected this to take off so well, let alone end up with 4000+ comments. Now it's time for part 2!
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1. We are all here to have a little fun. Am I right?
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He tries to watch TV, but he can't concentrate. The problem is that even though he's alone now, he doesn't feel like he's alone, because he has Evan Lysacek's long rangy tanned body with him. He tries to avoid Lysacek as much as possible in his life, and it's jarring and unpleasant to see him every time he accidentally glimpses the hotel mirror.
He turns off the TV and occupies his time by making a list of everything he can remember doing yesterday, trying to figure out what on earth went wrong enough that this happened. It's distracting for a while, but he doesn't come up with anything and he still feels restless and anxious so he decides to risk going for a jog, in a hat pulled down and sunglasses. He still feels self-conscious from the way he towers above people in the street, and every time someone looks at him twice he panics that they're going to ask him if he's famous gold medalist Evan Lysacek, but when the time finally comes to meet Lysacek for skating practice he feels much looser and more relaxed.
And it's a good thing, because as soon as he sees Evan outside the ice rink his stress level rises again. He could maybe just about get used to having Evan's body with him all the time, but seeing Evan in his is just weird and creepy, like having an evil clone. Plus his ass looks enormous in Evan's clothes.
Evan waves.
"Hi," Johnny says, trying to smile. Hikaru the rink employee comes up to them, all full of excitement, and Johnny touches his cheek just to watch Evan try not to flinch.
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Johnny pauses in the middle of lacing up his skates. Well, Evan's skates.
"Please enlighten me," he says.
"Okay, but don't get mad," Evan says, and Johnny is instantly mad, just like that. He continues lacing and doesn't say anything.
"Alright," Evan says. "Uh. So yesterday, I was taking a lunch break. So I went out, like, to buy some food. And the lady who was at this counter at the store, she was, well, she was really hot."
Johnny can't help but snort a little, but he doesn't look up.
"Right, so... I was trying to talk to her, you know, and I found some way to work my name in, but she didn't know who I was. So then I was trying to tell her about my gold medal, but like, she was making all these skeptical faces so I pulled it out."
"Oh my God," Johnny says, unable to stay silent. "You carry it around with you? Still?"
"I like it a lot," Evan says defensively.
"Wait, wait," Johnny says. "Do you have it with you now?"
The flush in Evan's face shows up much better on Johnny's pale skin. "Um," he says. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a section of ribbon.
"You keep it in your pocket? What if it gets stolen?"
"I'm really careful," Evan says, a little sheepishly. "Look, if you'd won one, you'd be-"
"Okay, shut up," Johnny snaps. Leave it to Lysacek to take all the fun out of this. "So you showed the girl your medal."
"Yeah," Evan says, sounding relieved to be back to the story. "I showed it to her, and usually that gets girls pretty interested, but she just looked kind of disgusted."
Johnny feels a pang of empathy.
"So I was like, what's wrong, and she said something really-okay, it was weird because her English wasn't that good, but all of a sudden it got really good and she said something about pride going before a fall and how it was time someone taught me a lesson about the true meaning of winning or something like that. And then there was this moment where, like, the sun was in my eyes so I couldn't see that well, but for a second I was looking at her and she looked like the girl but also at the same time like an old woman? And like, really angry? But then I blinked and she was back to normal and just smiling at me, so I forgot about it until today."
"Let me get this straight," Johnny says. He's going for a tone of quiet danger, but Evan's voice won't quite do it. "You got me put into your Paul Bunyan body because the girl you decided to whip out your medal for turned out to be some kind of crazy magical old woman?"
"I think," Evan says. "Maybe."
"Jesus, Evan," Johnny says, straightening up and giving him a look of disgust. "Why couldn't you just keep it in your pants for once? Your medal, I mean."
"I said not to be mad," Evan says glumly.
"And I didn't agree to that," Johnny says. "You had better do something absolutely incredible to make this up to me when this gets fixed. To start with, you get on the ice first."
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(Fuck you LJ, let me post anon! >:O)
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“I thought you were an Olympic fucking Champion,” Johnny says, leaning his elbows on the boards.
Evan skates over, face red from exertion and the cold air. “I am,” he says, gritting his teeth. “This is really hard. I’m not used to being you.”
“Not as easy as it looks, huh?” Johnny says.
Evan hesitates. “You know how hard it is when your weight’s off-”
“Yeah, I know,” Johnny says. “But this is your chance to practice. Come on, Lysacek.”
“Fine. Show me how you go into the first combination, then.”
“Fine,” Johnny says, and steps onto the ice.
Instantly, he knows he’s about to make an idiot of himself. It just feels wrong, he’s too high above the ice and he doesn’t know how to make these legs work right. He loops around, testing it out. He can see Evan watching him in his peripheral vision. Fuck it, he might as well just go for it.
He curves around, imagining his short program music swelling out, and jumps. A moment later, his ass hits the ice. Of course. He gets up again and skates over to Evan.
“Don’t say it,” he hisses. “You got me into this by trying to trade your gold medal for sex.”
“I didn’t say anything,” Evan says, crossing his arms.
“You could have,” Johnny bites.
“I’m just saying, it’s hard,” Evan says. “And by the way, I wasn’t going to trade my medal for sex. I would never do that.”
“Right, because it would mean your medal leaving your side,” Johnny says. “God forbid. Are we going to practice, or what?”
“I didn’t stop us,” Evan says, pushing away from the wall. “Show me again, just the lead-up, and then I’ll practice the jumping.”
Johnny has to hand it to him. All the articles he’s read and rolled his eyes at about Evan Lysacek’s famous work ethic, and it turns out he lives up to it. Evan tries the jumps over and over again, not seeming to care how many times he’s fallen, and after an hour or so he’s starting to look good. Not like Johnny-he’s never been graceful enough-and not even like Evan, because Evan’s jumps are smooth and effortless and these look forced. But he’s at least starting to look like maybe Johnny on a really bad day, when he’s tired and sick and unmotivated, so hopefully that will be enough for Galina. After all, Johnny’s not going to be there to hear her.
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"Okay," Evan says. "Your turn."
Maybe having Evan go first wasn't such a great idea. Because now he's actually gotten somewhere, and Johnny's still trying to figure out where his knees are. He skates out slowly, trying to get a feel for it, and Evan skates up behind him.
"Maybe you should just try some footwork and stuff before we get down to the specific choreography," Evan says, and there's a weird note in his voice, something cautious and almost... protective. Johnny turns to face him, wary.
"Why would you say that?"
"I just, I'm a lot taller than you are and a lot bonier and falling really hurts, that's all."
Johnny actually jerks away from him. "Excuse me?"
"I'm just saying-"
"You think it hurts more when you fall than when I fall? You think I can't handle that? You think I'm more padded than you are?" Bad enough to have Evan touting himself as the pain tolerance king of figure skating, with his manly endurance and everything, but calling Johnny fat is seriously the last straw.
"No, that's not-I mean, yeah, but only because I'm taller, it's not like I'm judging you-"
"Get off the ice," Johnny says viciously. He's not a violent person, but he kind of really wants to hit Evan right now and it's unsettling to feel the urge to punch his own face and he needs Evan to go away.
"I just mean, I wouldn't have said anything but I was just skating as you and I thought-"
"Get off," Johnny says, and Evan kind of shrugs and skates away. Johnny glides over the ice, willing himself to get used to this right now. It's not that bad. It's just like normal skating, only on stilts or something. He grits his teeth and launches into a double lutz.
And, okay. Maybe it does actually hurt a little more than he's used to, but not enough for Evan to mention it, like he's some super special unique person who has to go through so much more and work so much harder because he was cursed with being twelve feet tall and having the natural grace of a cave troll, like a normal person wouldn't just take the hint and not go into fucking figure skating.
Johnny pushes himself up as fast as possible, not letting himself so much as wince, skates around a little to build up speed and then tries an axel. Just a double, but he falls on his side and pushes himself back up before he can even feel it. Tomorrow there'll be a bruise, but for now he loops back around and tries the lutz again.
There. He has to single it, but he lands it, wobbling only a little on Evan's big feet. He hopes Evan is watching.
He practices a few more jumps, just to make it clear that he is going to work just as hard at this as Evan did, maybe even more because Evan's body sucks, and then looks over and gives him a nod. Evan steps back onto the ice and skates over to him.
"Okay, ready to learn my short program?"
Johnny wants to snap at him, but he hasn't really said anything offensive this time, so he just says "Yes" with as much force as he can manage and gets ready to learn.
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a-MAZ-ing, probably my favorite line yet! i love this so much.
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