hello there.
i realized something interesting today. and this part is gonna make me sound like a complete homo. like, complete. but.
today, i realized, that its been such a long time since i visited your tumblr acc. so long indeed..
wait. if i don't make much sense at some parts, pardon me. i'm sick and its 5.30 am.
it made me think of a few things within a short time.
to me, i still feel awkward moments whereby we get eye contact in school.
but, seems like thats all. true, i'll always miss the friend i had in you. i remembered that there were times in the past that i told myself i'd never let go of the 2 of you. i bared my heart to you two. especially you two. one told me he'd be a 'persistent cockroach', be always there for me. i guess i've learnt that things won't work out that way. times change, people change.
but i'm not saying i'm going to be bitter. because now, i believe i'll have others i can depend on, some the same since the past, some old friends, some new, you know?
the funny part is how i know, that there will always be a part of me that misses you two dearly.
well, on the night of the new year, countdown.
i remember drinking, just faizal and me. first i was high. lol.
then before i knew it, i was down. so, very down. upset, crying to him. about how things change, about how i never meant for so many things to turn out the way they did, about the 2 whom i loved dearly as friends, and others who currently seem to despise my gut. (wah, i call your name also cannot. i want to try talking to you, you ignore. other people tell me you find it awkward to talk to me, but you act like i killed your dogs! =_= really? i never wanted this.)
yeap, i found out i'm a dweeb who gets bothered enough about the people whom i know hate me that i see them in my dreams. god knows why though, but they all seem find with me in them. sigh. i like friends, i may get irritated with friends, but i'm not one who can easily forget friends. i'm just sad it seemed like you two, after knowing each other, were in your own world. but after that i tried having girlie talks with you during storyboarding class. but then work related crap happens. then now its just depressing to know that i sorta lost a friend there. and i'm still not sure why. Faizal tells me my facial expressions fail. like, FAIL. like, i often seem pissed. =_= sigh.
BUT, i digress.
basically, i realized that i've not snooped around your tumblr in so long.
its nice knowing that. because maybe, just maybe, i'm moving forward, instead of moping in one spot about you two. so yea. maybe one day, i'll be able to look back at everything, and laugh about it.
but now, i have other people to treasure. i admit, it hurts when i think about how i may not have mattered to them as much as they mattered to me. (esp the dude. you. bleghh. i have no idea what happened. i was gone for awhile, you had newer friends to hang around. i felt damn ignored. lol. sigh. but i still like watching you perform on stage a lot. hahaha)
random, but, I love you Faizal. thanks for being the one who knocks sense into me when i mope. lolXD
thats all then.
today, i realized, that its been such a long time since i visited your tumblr acc. so long indeed..
wait. if i don't make much sense at some parts, pardon me. i'm sick and its 5.30 am.
it made me think of a few things within a short time.
to me, i still feel awkward moments whereby we get eye contact in school.
but, seems like thats all. true, i'll always miss the friend i had in you. i remembered that there were times in the past that i told myself i'd never let go of the 2 of you. i bared my heart to you two. especially you two. one told me he'd be a 'persistent cockroach', be always there for me. i guess i've learnt that things won't work out that way. times change, people change.
but i'm not saying i'm going to be bitter. because now, i believe i'll have others i can depend on, some the same since the past, some old friends, some new, you know?
the funny part is how i know, that there will always be a part of me that misses you two dearly.
well, on the night of the new year, countdown.
i remember drinking, just faizal and me. first i was high. lol.
then before i knew it, i was down. so, very down. upset, crying to him. about how things change, about how i never meant for so many things to turn out the way they did, about the 2 whom i loved dearly as friends, and others who currently seem to despise my gut. (wah, i call your name also cannot. i want to try talking to you, you ignore. other people tell me you find it awkward to talk to me, but you act like i killed your dogs! =_= really? i never wanted this.)
yeap, i found out i'm a dweeb who gets bothered enough about the people whom i know hate me that i see them in my dreams. god knows why though, but they all seem find with me in them. sigh. i like friends, i may get irritated with friends, but i'm not one who can easily forget friends. i'm just sad it seemed like you two, after knowing each other, were in your own world. but after that i tried having girlie talks with you during storyboarding class. but then work related crap happens. then now its just depressing to know that i sorta lost a friend there. and i'm still not sure why. Faizal tells me my facial expressions fail. like, FAIL. like, i often seem pissed. =_= sigh.
BUT, i digress.
basically, i realized that i've not snooped around your tumblr in so long.
its nice knowing that. because maybe, just maybe, i'm moving forward, instead of moping in one spot about you two. so yea. maybe one day, i'll be able to look back at everything, and laugh about it.
but now, i have other people to treasure. i admit, it hurts when i think about how i may not have mattered to them as much as they mattered to me. (esp the dude. you. bleghh. i have no idea what happened. i was gone for awhile, you had newer friends to hang around. i felt damn ignored. lol. sigh. but i still like watching you perform on stage a lot. hahaha)
random, but, I love you Faizal. thanks for being the one who knocks sense into me when i mope. lolXD
thats all then.