and so today begins...
I left for work this morning, like I always do, and shut and locked the door behind me.
I went to the truck and unlocked it with the remote.
I put all my crap on the seat.
I switched out yesterday’s soda can with today’s one.
I shut the door and went around to the drivers side.
The door was locked.
My keys were on the seat inside.
My phone was on the seat inside.
My Nextel was in my bag, on the seat inside.
My hoodie was on the seat inside.
And it was raining.
So, I had to laugh, cuz come on, seriously? I’m locked out of my house AND my truck, it’s raining, and none of my neighbors are home.
Excellent.
I go back to the porch (where I had left all but the window next to the door open for the kitties), and Olivia comes to the window like OH HAI!!!
She’s rubbing her face on the screen, loving the attention.
I, on the other hand, am trying to figure out a way inside so I can (hopefully) find the spare truck key. I haven’t seen this thing in years, mind you, but I am pretty sure it’s in my blue Happy Bunny wallet smooshed into a bookcase in my living room.
I remember everything. J
So now, I need to get inside. So I shimmy the screen up, which Olivia thought was just great, and came over for pets.
I lean in to try to reach the lock on the window next to the door, cuz then I can open that window and then the door.
Yeah, I couldn’t reach it. I was short by about an inch.
So I try going in face up, thinking that might afford me that extra inch.
Yeah, no dice.
Olivia came for more pets.
So I sat there and contemplated. I could drag my fat arse through the window, but I was 100% positive I would hurt the hell out of myself. So I made that my last resort option.
I snagged a piece of the shopvac that I use to keep the one locked window open (cuz I broke the rope thingy with the weight on the end of it that should keep it open… stupid old houses).
So, the shop vac piece doesn’t reach. Natch.
So I pet Olivia a bit more. Then I think “o hey, I have a beach umbrella in my truck,” and go and look at it (after shutting the screen).
It has one of those screw-into-the-sand-thingies to keep it anchored. So I take that off, and it’s a metal coil on the end.
Back to the window.
Open the window.
Pet Olivia.
Shove Olivia away.
And lo and behold! My macguyvering worked! Unlocked window, opened other window, opened door, went inside, yelled at cats for not having thumbs.
And the key was where I thought it was! Winnah winnah chicken dinnah!!
Of course, I missed my 9:00 meeting, cuz I didn’t actually leave my house till 8:55.
And that’s how my day began.
i still have to write about texas, and work, but not here, and not now. here and now was time for a funny.
:)