Grief, 5/5 Acceptance
Title: Grief, 5/5- Acceptance
Author: wingsss
Rating: K+
Summary: On her way back from Jacob's in chapter 8 of Eclipse, Bella's motorcycle is hit by a truck. She never makes it back to the Cullen's house. The following one shots highlight the reactions of Bella's closest friends and family.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I just move them around for my own amusement, and hopefully yours also. Hope you enjoy!
Author's note: This fan fiction is written as a series of one shots from the perspectives of characters in the 5 different stages of grief as described by psychologist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her book "On Death and Dying." They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
Acceptance- Carlisle Cullen
This was, unquestioningly, the very worst possible outcome of the unique situation Edward had gotten himself into. I feared that one day, she would die. But not one of us, even Alice with her exceptional foresight, thought it would be this soon. It was, and continues to be, devastating for all involved. Bella, such small and sweet girl, could never have anticipated the magnitude of consequences her death caused. There was no one in Forks who did not mourn the loss of her.
There was not one of my family-a family who made a point of avoiding ties with mortals-who was not shaken by this loss, including myself.
And yet, I knew it would happen one day. Perhaps it was because I surround myself with death on a daily basis, that I more fully understood the reality of this possibility. I knew that if Edward continued to drag his feet about changing her, this would happen someday. Especially given Bella's aptitude for getting herself into precarious situations.
But this had come on so fast. Blinded as he was by his own immortality and his feelings for her, he didn't prepare for this. He wasn't prepared for this. I realized too late that none of them were. If death is an inevitability, why not just accept it's certainty?
Or else ward against it. We had the tools to take the option of dying from her. There was no doubt in my mind that it's what she wanted. I often wonder if, in her last moments, she was hoping she had been changed. Or that she would be changed. If she hadn't been with Jacob just moments before, Alice could have saved her… from the truck, or from death itself. As it stands, she was just on the wrong side of the treaty line at the wrong time. Alice was blinded.
I'm sure she feels guilty. Incredibly so. And Jacob must be distraught.
And Edward… he felt so personally responsible for her death. It was always his nature to take tragedy in this way.
We decided to leave Forks, as part of the healing process. I thought it would help everyone if we weren't constantly reminded of her in time and place. No one came to say goodbye, not even Charlie, though I don't blame him. It was a further reminder that there was nothing left for us in Washington anymore. It was time to go.
We bought a house in Cold Bay, Alaska. There are less that 80 people in the town. Just outside is a huge wildlife refuge, a draw for those that enjoy the taste of large predators. It's biggest claim to fame is an airport that boasts the fifth largest runway in Alaska. It's not a permanent place-most people leave the little town in a year. They come to work, then go home. Or they get sick of the cold and the clouds and the wet, and head for the hills.
But a year was starting to seem like a long time to me. I, who had lived over six hundred of them. I came on as the town's only doctor after their last resident physician passed away. Esme worked at the Izembek National Wildlife Refuge as a wildlife biologist. The story with Jasper, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Edward was that they were completing correspondence school while we were here. In their spare time, they tutored the school aged kids.
We lived in a cabin, because that was the only structure available in the town of Cold Bay. It was not as open and airy as the beautiful house that now stood empty in Forks. It was… rustic. Of course, Esme had decorated it impeccably, but it was different. Like a classic log cabin, decorated in rich, warm reads and browns, yellows and oranges, with comfortable couches and thick woven blankets.
Everything got back to normal. Or it seemed back to normal.
It was a Saturday in September when Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and I got back from a hunting trip. Esme was cataloging the wildlife, and reported that there were too many brown bears, and they were disrupting the salmon populations. We returned to find Alice lying still as a stone on the couch.
"Alice?" Jasper questioned, taking her hand. She could be having a vision, but she was almost too still for that.
She blinked, and whispered almost hoarsely, "sorry," she closed her nearly black eyes. "So sorry,"
"What?" Rosalie asked, impatient.
"Where's Edward?" Esme asked.
"Gone," Alice replied. Her tone sounded ashamed. Her eyes dropped.
"Where, Alice?" I asked her calmly.
"I don't know!" She said, raising her voice. She pinched the bridge of her ashen nose between her thumb and forefinger. "He left! I was in my room, shopping online, and the next thing I know he's out the door. I couldn't trace the sent farther than the airport."
He'd made a split second decision, that much was clear. And obviously, he didn't know where he was headed yet, because neither did Alice.
It was a tense week at the Cullen camp in Cold Bay. Edward changed his mind so fast, Alice couldn't even get fair glimpses at his plans. One moment he was in Antarctica, one moment he was hunting something in Bolivia. The next moment, he was in Russia. I couldn't even think of what he was planning. Alice never saw him in Italy, so we weren't preparing for the call I received the following Friday morning.
It was an impossibly high, shrill sounding voice. The person-or vampire-on the other end of the line sounded haughty.
"Hello, this is Jane," the voice prompted. The line crackled. The cell phone signal we paid far too much for still barely worked in the isolated outpost.
"Yes?" I asked through my teeth.
"I'm calling you about Edward," she said, no hint of remorse in her tone. If my heart had still been beating, it would have stopped cold at that moment. "We were in Seattle, dealing with the little problem with those murders in the city. New born vampires out of control. He was near your former home. In Forks, lying out in the cemetery. In full sunlight."
I was silent.
"There were more than a few humans present. And-" but I knew what would come after. I nearly dropped the phone. I was finding it very hard to keep my marble features composed at the moment.
"It was fast, Carlisle. I'm sure he didn't even know it was coming. And the humans… well, they won't be talking about what they saw."
"Thank you, for the call, Jane," I crushed the phone in my hand. I must have broken it because the line went dead. I had no grounds on which to protest. I was sure he'd broken the law. And regardless, if he was dead there was no reason to get up in arms. There was no way to fix this. I had known it all along.
Alice gasped before I had a chance to say anything. She'd been blinded, once again, by the nature of her gift. The Volturi had been in Washington, but not for Edward. It was, once again, a situation for being in the wrong place in the wrong time. And now, we had another death in the family.
I refused to believe this was happening again.