[Arashi] Utaban 2009.11.17
T/N: I fully admit that I've only looked over this once. ^^; If you spot any grammar mistakes, let me know! I'll look over it again after work tomorrow for the final product. o> Done!
Nakai: Please welcome Arashi!
Narrator: Arashi has hit their 10th Anniversary! Tonight, we'll reveal treasured video clips, as well as old clips of Arashi on Utaban!
[Arashi has hit their 10th Anniversary
We'll show treasured video clips and go through the usual routine tonight]
Nakai: Someone just touched my [beep] just now!
Nakai: Okay, we're calling in our next guest for the show...
Taka: Oh!
Nakai: I want to introduce them, but the atmosphere here is kind of different...
Taka: It kind of feels like we're the away team. People have been saying, "Die, Nakai!" "Get out of the way, Ishibashi!" They're really attacking us, you know.
Nakai: Do you like them? Do you like them?
Nakai: In that case, let's call them out. They've hit their 10th Anniversary! Please welcome Arashi~!
[Congrats Arashi 10th Anniversary]
[Arashi]
Nino: Thank you!
Sho: Thank you!
Sho: Thanks for having us~
Nino: Thanks for having us~
Nakai: Your 10th Anniversary, huh?
Girls: So cute~
Nakai: You can't reach them even if you keep squealing, "You're so cool~!" They're people who stand above the clouds. You don't get it, do you? You really need a wake-up call. Sorry, but I stand above the clouds too, okay.
Nino: What are you talking about?
Aiba: Wow...
Nakai: Anyway, did the five of you have a celebration or anything?
Sho: Well... we did today, didn't we?
Nino: Indeed.
Sho: Today is the day we had our debut.
Taka: At Hawaii?
[Video provider: Fuji TV]
Sho: Right, right.
Taka: You went out on a boat.
Nino: (overlap) After that we went to Tokyo, too.
Jun: After that, we had a handshake event in Tokyo. In Yoyogi.
Nakai: You had a handshake event?
Jun: We did.
Nakai: Who went to that handshake event?
Jun: Cool!
Taka: Who did you shake hands with? All of them?
Girl: Yes.
Nakai: You shook hands with all of them?
Taka: Whose touch was the best for you?
Nakai: The feel of it!
Taka: The feel of it.
Girl: Sho-kun's.
Taka: Sho!
Sho: (overlap) Mine was the best?
Taka: Go shake her hand!
Sho: What?
[So shocked by the sudden turn of events,
the Arashi fan doesn't know what to do]
Girl: NO~!!!
Sho: Bro...
Nakai: She actually said "NO~!!!" "NO~!!!" I hardly ever get that reaction, you know!
Sho: (overlap) That's true, but given the situation...
Nakai: "NOOOO~!!"
[A handshake after 10 years...]
Sho: I was surprised, too!
Taka: Her soul just left.
Nakai: What?
Taka: Her soul left.
Ohno: [mumble]
Taka: What? What did you say?
Ohno: Don't do that.
Jun: Our Ohno-san just asked you to stop.
Nakai: That's rare, that's very rare.
Nino: (overlap) He's right, you shouldn't do that.
Ohno: (mouth; can't hear his voice XD) Don't do that.
Nakai: Okay, for the show tonight!
Arashi: Yes!
Nakai: We've sent out a survey asking Arashi fans to pick the old Arashi videos they would like to watch again, and here are the results. Please have a look!
[Arashi 10th Anniversary SP
Using the results from a survey, we've collected treasured, memorable moments of the Arashi members from various genres such as dramas, variety shows, songs, etc, and we will now show all these clips on their 10th Anniversary!]
Narrator: Here are the five most treasured Arashi moments everyone has chosen to see again!
[5th place
Arashi's first appearance on Utaban]
Narrator: First up, here's number 5! Arashi's first appearance on Utaban!
[A treasured Arashi moment we want to see again
5th - First appearance on Utaban]
Nakai: Let's welcome Arashi! Come in!
[The special feature for this week
Arashi]
Narrator: Please take a look at this valuable clip of Arashi's first Utaban talk from five years ago!
Nakai: Okay, this is Arashi~!
Arashi: Hello~!
[Sakurai Sho (18-years-old)]
Sho: Um, I'm Sakurai Sho, 18-years-old.
[Ninomiya Kazunari (16-years-old)]
Nino: I'm Ninomiya Kazunari, 16-years-old.
[Matsumoto Jun (16-years-old)]
Jun: I'm Matsumoto Jun, 16-years-old.
Nakai: 16-years-old!
Jun: Yes.
[Aiba Masaki (17-years-old)]
Aiba: I'm Aiba Masaki, 17-years-old.
Aiba: I have the most fun... when I'm taking a bath.
Aiba: (overlap) That's so pathetic.
[Ohno Satoshi (18-years-old)]
Nakai: Okay, let's move on to the last person. Here's the last person, go ahead!
Ohno: I'm Ohno Satoshi. I enjoy... the bicycle ride I take to go home after work.
Narrator: Next is number 4! Ninomiya and Matsumoto's first drama appearances!
[A treasured Arashi moment we want to see again
4th - Ninomiya & Matsumoto's first drama appearances]
Narrator: The drama "Amagigoe" was aired on New Year's Day in 1998.
[Special New Year's Day Segment
Produced by Matsumoto Seichou]
Narrator: Ninomiya was 14-years-old at the time.
[Ninomiya Kazunari
(14-years-old)]
Taka: You're so cute~
Nino: Cute... I haven't--
Nakai: You haven't changed at all.
Nino: Yeah, I haven't changed.
Nino: Some guy who looked like a labourer said he had something to tell me... and that's what he did.
Narrator: And here's a clip of Matsumoto's first drama appearance
Jun: (overlap) Oh crap.
Narrator: when he was 13-years-old!
Jun: (overlap) It came on so suddenly.
[Insurance investigator
Shigarami Tarou's Case Notes 3]
Jun: You should just ignore that guy!
[Matsumoto Jun (13-years-old)]
Sho: Whaaaat? This is amazing!!
Jun: (overlap) --punched his own mother...
Guy: The only thing he never missed was soccer practice with Shuichi-kun.
Narrator: Number 3! Examinations Squad, Arashi!
Aiba: (overlap) Wow, this brings back memories!
Narrator: It's a segment where Arashi cosplay as the Examinations Squad and help children to pass their examinations!
[A treasured Arashi moment we want to see again
3rd - Examinations Squad, Arashi]
Jun: We are The Examinations Squad...
Arashi: Arashi!
Sho: Aiba-chan!
Host: So! With that...
Sho: Hey!
Host: It's sliding down, it's sliding down.
Host: For the last question, please give a word that ends with "n".
[Q. What is a word that ends with "n"?]
Host: Here we go!
Boy: Poop!
Host: The "n" was in the middle! In the middle! (*note: "Poop" in Japanese is "u-N-chi"]
Narrator: And here's number 2! Arashi forms collaborations with popular comedians!
[A treasured Arashi moment we want to see again
2nd - Arashi x popular comedians collaboration]
Narrator: Arashi and popular comedians had an unbelievably special collaboration!
Yuttei & Aiba: Inte~nse! Don't sweat the small things, that's important, important.
Muscle: BETTER NOT PEE YOUR PANTS.
Sho: NOT PEE YOUR PANTS.
Glasses: What the hell is it?
Muscle: LET'S GO.
Muscle & Sho: LOOK AT THESE MUSCLES. THEY'RE ROCK HARD, YOU KNOW. ROCK HARD, YOU KNOW. CHILLS YOU TO THE BONE, DON'T THEY.
Glasses: Like hell they do, what are you doing!?
Muscle & Sho: WE'RE SO FRUSTRATED.
Nino: He went to visit a museum with a girl~
Nino: And when she stared at the goblin's kimono~
Nino: Somehow he feels like he can score a hit today~ (*note: double entendre for an orgasm)
Kimura & Nino: We think he can!
Narrator: That's all of the clips from 2nd to 5th place!
[Treasured Arashi clips from 2nd to 5th place]
Nakai: Matsumoto-kun, how old were you, 13-years-old?
Jun: Thirteen.
[Matsumoto Jun at 13-years-old]
Nakai: That really was about two, three years before you had your debut.
Jun: About... two years, I think.
Nakai: Wow... you started acting at such a young age. Ninomiya-kun, you haven't changed much.
Nino: Yeah...
Nakai: You pretty much don't change.
Nino: You're right.
[After the break,
We'll show you the clip that took 1st place and Arashi's hit tunes]
Narrator: After the break, find out which clip got 1st place! We'll also air Arashi's hit tunes!
Taka: Your album was a million seller, wasn't it?
Jun: "All the Best".
Taka: It was a million seller, right?
Nakai: It's your first one?
Arashi: That's right.
Taka: "Tears leak".
Sho: It's not "leak".
Aiba: It's not "leak".
Nakai: This person always gets the lyrics wrong!
Jun: I was reading a magazine,
Nakai: (overlap) He always gets it wrong!
[Provided by the main company of duet editing section]
Jun: and at the subtitle part, the part that they write in large font, they actually wrote "tears leak".
[A selection of Arashi's hit tunes we want to hear]
[A.RA.SHI
November, 2005]
Nakai: See, you're doing it properly here!
Nakai: See, see? Look at that!
Sho: You're right.
[Sakura sake
March, 2005]
[Love so sweet
February, 2007]
Nakai: I feel like I've heard this before.
Sho: It's the theme song for a drama...
Nakai: Oh, right!
[Happiness
September, 2007]
[One Love
June, 2008]
[Beautiful Days
November, 2008]
Taka: The entire way home, I can't stop my tears~
Taka: Memories trickle from the sky, tears leak, overflowing~
Nakai: And all these songs got 1st place, didn't they?
Nakai: Which songs did you like best?
Taka: Let's see... "Tears leak" and their debut song.
Nakai: Your debut song. Right. But just by watching the video, you can tell It's kind of different now, can't you?
Jun: I think we're doing our best in our own way right now...
Nakai: But you've clearly forgotten. Have you forgotten?
Nino: We haven't forgotten.
Jun: We're not trying to forget.
Nino: (overlap) We're not trying to, but it's possible that--
Nakai: Have you become like this? (*note: The masks displayed are tengu masks. It's said that tengu fell onto the demon side because of their overflowing pride or ambition. Hence, Nakai is asking if Arashi has become too proud to dance like they did in the old days.)
Jun: No, we haven't.
Nino: We haven't. We haven't become like that at all.
Nakai: Are you sure?
Nino: We haven't.
Nakai: Then you better give us a cheerful performance!
Nakai: You have a lot of responsibility, you know!
Aiba: Yes.
Nakai: That girl has been following you for ten years since that handshake event!
Nino: You're right, you're right.
Nakai: You better skip! Use your whole body.
Arashi: Okay!
Sho: Five, six, seven!
[They must not forget their old selves even after ten years]
Nakai: Okay, stop stop stop stop. It's different.
Jun: What is?
Nakai: What? I... what was that? You all had fake smiles. Like this.
Nino: That's not true.
Sho: They weren't fake.
Nakai: Smile till we can see your lower gums!!
[Lower gums??]
Nakai: Your smiles are fake!
Nino: Sorry!
Sho: Sorry!
Nakai: Let's go!
Sho: (overlap) Starting from five, okay?
Arashi: Okay!
Sho: Five, six, seven!
[They must not forget their lower gums even after ten years]
Nakai: Smile! Smile!! Okay, okay!
Jun: Thank you very much.
Nino: Thank you very much.
[After the break,
Nakai flies into a rage after the winning video clip]
Narrator: Arashi's treasured clips! Coming in splendidly at 1st place is Utaban's speciality: Nakai vs Ohno, a history of a junior dominating his senior!
[1st place
Utaban's speciality: Nakai vs Ohno
A history of a junior dominating his senior]
Narrator: The war broke out on 17 October, 2002.
[[A treasured Arashi moment we want to see again
1st - Nakai vs Ohno, a history of a junior dominating his senior]
Nakai: I'm going to air an old video of SMAP!
Ohno: You're so immature, Nakai.
Nino: Come, come, it's okay...
Sho: Sorry, we're sorry!
Nino: It's okay, it's okay~
Ohno: You're usually uncool anyway.
Ohno: You're not bald so it doesn't matter, right!?
Nino: Stop him! Stop him!!
Nakai: Someone's not listening to our conversation at all.
Nino: He's not listening at all.
Nakai: Hey Ohno, are you listening to our conversation at all!?
Ohno: Hell no.
Nino: Stop him, stop him!
Jun: Stop, stop!! Nakai-san, Nakai-san, Nakai-san! Nakai-san!!
Nakai: Throw me. Throw me.
Jun: Nakai-san!
Ohno: So you finally get it, do you?
[Will someone please stop this man]
Narrator: The war that began in October, 2002, has been aired a shocking number of 46 times! Nakai and Ohno's battle will never end.
Narrator: After the break, Ohno and even Ninomiya get into a fight!
[After the break,
there's a new development in their 10th year...!!]
[Since both have matured over the ten years...]
Nino: We owe you our gratitude for a lot of things, too.
[Protecting the conducting wires]
Nakai: You were still young at the time, so it was all right.
Jun: Yes.
Nakai: But all of you are adults now!
Arashi: Yes! Yes!
Nakai: Stay steadfast, okay? You got it, Ohno?
Ohno: You're the most petty kid here.
Nakai: He just shot it back at me--!
Nakai: Who the hell touched me? You touched me, didn't you?
Nino: I didn't touch you, I didn't touch you. I didn't touch you. Look, people are watching!
Nakai: You touched my penis just now!
Nino: No I didn't.
Nakai: You grabbed it and shook, didn't you?
Nino: I didn't.
Nakai: You totally shook it, didn't you?
Nino: I swear I didn't touch it!