024 [Video]

[wingsandwill]

[Castiel is back to video, recovered enough from his death to return to spamming the network.]The past few weeks have been particularly tumultuous, even by the standards of this dimension. I have some details regarding the incidents occurring in the middle of the month, between the events, for those that are still uninformed. In return, it would be

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[feel_nevermore]

[She simply nods at his question.] Yes.

Where shall we meet?

[He needs to give her back that poetry book she lent him while he was at the clinic after all... But more seriously, she's missed him, their conversations and just his company. She's still hurt, yet she'd like to have him back in her life like... before. And maybe if they talk, they can work things out.]

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[wingsandwill]

[Indeed, and he's read the entire thing a few times by now.]

Can you meet me on the Temple grounds?

[He's still worn out in general and doesn't want to walk much. He's barely been leaving the Temple at all, really.]

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[feel_nevermore]

[Raven feels a bit uneasy with his request at first. The Temple is a 'crowded' place by Raven's standards. But although Castiel's said he had recovered enough to meet with her, she doesn't know if he's feeling well enough for her to ask him to come to her place. Even if her house is located in the same quarter of the city as the Temple...]

Alright. I'll be there in five minutes.

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[wingsandwill]

[He nods slightly, and cuts the feed before heading out onto the grounds. He wanders some distance from the Temple, but not so far that he's off the grounds, holding the book he owes her back and quietly waiting for her to arrive.]

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[feel_nevermore]

[Raven flies quickly to the Temple grounds. As usual, she senses Castiel's presence shortly before she actually sees him. She lands softly a few feet away from him, wondering whether or not she should come closer to him. And then she notices the book and decides to walk the remaining distance.]

Hey.

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[wingsandwill]

[He steps toward her as well, nodding slightly in greeting. When close enough, he hands her the book, glancing down awkwardly instead of looking at her.

What is supposed to say? Their fight had been terrible. Neither of them had been truly responsible, yet they both had their own fault in it nonetheless. He's quiet another moment, before just broaching the subject in his usual blunt way.]

I'm sorry.

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[feel_nevermore]

[Raven takes the book, noticing that he's avoiding her gaze. She caresses the book cover absentmindedly about to ask if Castiel had liked the poems.

So when he speaks, her eyes widen a bit in surprise. She hadn't expected this so soon. But that's something they have in common, they're both blunt. And it's probably better that way.]

What part of it are you sorry for exactly?

[Her voice is quiet, soft.]

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[wingsandwill]

All of it.

[Normally, the answer might be an avoidance of naming specific things, or a hallmark of an insincere apology, but in this case Castiel is simply telling the truth. Everything that occurred he wish hadn't happened, from what he'd said to what he'd done.]

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[feel_nevermore]

[Raven looks away, thoughtfully.] You weren't being yourself. [That's why she's here. She wouldn't be if she thought otherwise.] You were under the influence of Sonja. As I was.

Why did you never tell me about this exorcism ritual? [Had he actually considered using it against her since the day he met her?]

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[wingsandwill]

[He finally looks at her, when she looks away. They had indeed been both affected, and it wasn't truly their faults, but then again it wasn't like it had been an event. There was more responsibility here than there would've been.

At he question, he sighs quietly.]

I never had reason to. I saw no reason I might have to use it, as I wasn't certain it would have any effect here, and other than Sonja I had no conflicts with anyone who might be susceptible to it.

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[feel_nevermore]

I told you about my abilities even when I wasn't planning to use them against you. [The retort is matter-of-fact.] When you chanted it, the words of the ritual felt very personal. ...I felt betrayed.

[She turns to meet his gaze again.] I'm sorry for the things I said. I didn't mean them. Any of them.

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[wingsandwill]

I can't list every individual ritual or method of dealing with any sort of supernatural being that I know of. There would never be enough time. [He response is also, though maybe a bit defensive.] The Rituale Romanum is a standardized ritual. As most demons are similar in regards to Hell and Lucifer it's simply general. I didn't choose it based on what you have told me, rather on what I thought might work. [He has to try to explain; he hadn't chosen it because of her, but because she's partially a demon and therefore there was a chance it would work.

His eyes flicker slightly at her apology; it isn't that he's outright doubting her, just... He's heard what she'd said before. He knows it's true, so it's difficult to believe she doesn't mean it.] It would be understood if you did. [In other words, she can admit it.]

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[feel_nevermore]

[His explanation soothed her somehow. It sounded perfectly logical but maybe it's just something she needed to hear from him.] I'm not used to you seeing me as a demon. Even if that's part of what I am. [Lucifer told her once that there was no such thing as being 'half-human'. Either you were or you weren't. And she wasn't. It hard hurt to hear it from Lucifer, although she despised him with every fiber of her being. Hearing Castiel calling her an abomination had been a thousand times worse.]

[She shook her head.] If I did I wouldn't have waited to be possessed by Anger to tell you. You're my... ally, I owe you at least that much honesty and respect. [The word she had meant to say was friend of course, not ally, but what they're doing here is not easy for any of them. Because they're both so full of insecurities. But it's worth it.] When we fought, you told me that with or without your Grace, you were still an angel. I don't care much about angels really. But for me, with or without your Grace, you're still Castiel.

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[wingsandwill]

I have learned not to look at species as a factor in social interaction, but in terms of effectiveness in a fight, it's of import. [In other words, just as if he were fighting an angel, or a vampire, or anything else he saw her demonic nature in terms of strategy and nothing more. And as he himself is some weird combination of beings now, and he has close friends that are similarly unclear in what they are, he knows better than to judge.

He's quiet while she talks, and her words are reassuring to him, despite his complex about this issue in particular.] I lied when I said I was still an angel, but that may not ultimately be of import. [He's finally beginning to make his own identity outside of that, and hearing her saying it in such a way is greatly helpful.] I'm... Thank you.

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[feel_nevermore]

[Effectiveness in a fight. Usefulness. That's the way she's used to looking at her powers. The only way that makes it bearable for her to be what she is. She nods.] That's good, then.

[Raven gives him a small smile.] You're welcome... Cas. [On a whim, she walks to him and gives him an awkward but warm hug, a bit similar to the one she gave him when they were underwater.] All I ask is that you won't stop calling out for me when you need help. Okay?

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[wingsandwill]

[Though he's become pretty used to hugs in general, this one is unexpected. She's forgiving him already?

He can't say he'll agree to that last part, though. He'd begun to feel guilty even before the conflict had happened, about how often he needed her healing and how often he ended up getting himself into something like an idiot. So he doesn't answer, but does return the hug, just glad for the moment that it seems like this incident hasn't destroyed the friendship they'd been forming.]