... Yah! Life is good ^__~
|XxX| Silent Tears |XxX|
Crystaline tears
Slipping down
A pale face
Dark lips
Pulled apart
In a silent
Scream...
Crimson liquid
Rolling down
Pale flesh
A broken sob
Caught in her throat
Broken dreams
Violent promises
Dark whispers
Red Desire
Black pain
Control lost
You pushed me to this edge
And now you will be the one
To suffer...
What a lovely day today is finally being!! After about two day of complete and utter hell and being yelled at, at almost every turn its a nice change of pace to finally be smiling and laughing. It was however my own fault, I pushed my parents to far and I deserved everything I got. Appartently though I didn't learn from my own mistake because... if I was given the chance I would do it again in a heartbeat except I would just come home early and do my job. Which would have proven to my father that I am adult enough to be able to go out and still do my job. But.. I was afraid true fear shouldn't have ruled me but... I couldn't really face him not after the fight we got in. I was afraid that if I went home he would throw me out and then where would I be? Nowhere that's were... I have no place to go, and I couldn't leave all this behind. My life, my heart, everything is here in this little town where I grew up. I would be loosing to much, and gaining so very little if I were to leave, and so I do not want to leave. I do not wish to leave... I know there are those who would allow me to stay with them. And I thank you with every last ounce of my heart and soul!! But... I cannot leave this place... it is my home... Life will get better I mean after all isn't that what you always told me? I- I am not strong enough nor grown up enough to be on my own now.. and I would hate loosing my family and my beautiful neices. And soo... I shall continue on no matter how hard it may get in the end.. Thank you all for everything... You will always be in my heart and soul....
I know you will probably never read this Alex.. but I want you to know..
I know... you lost the most important thing in you life. I know it was hard when I came and then just as quickly went, but no matter how small you changed me. You opened up my eyes to not only the good but the evil of the world and so I thank you... You showed me wonderful and yet terrible things... those times I almost lost you and then the day you left again... If I've ever had a brother in this lifetime... Alex you were it though you were as complex and simple as a lone wolf searching for a lifelong mate. I'm glad you got to be with her again... even if in the end it meant me loosing the only brother I've ever had. My love for you has always been brotherly this I know. I watched you change before my eyes... mature become the man I know you are today. You made me who I am.. and so I thank you without you... there are those chances I wouldn't be here today. I miss you with all of my heart and soul... and hope that one day we will meet again.. I will look for the wolf brother... I will find you again... one day.
Thank you for your time and reading my journal... I hope you enjoyed it I know this entry was long.. and so I appologize...