well here it is
my first published attempt at some "creative" writing. Hope you enjoy it... and i will try my best to not make it my last.
(feed back Definatly welcome, and appreicated)
She had been here before; teetering on this proverbial edge. Staring out at the valley they shared together what felt like lifetimes ago. In her hand a photo worn and tattered from her constant nervous wringing. Love was so young back then it felt invincable, and it felt so damn real. Was it just that realness that she was holding onto now, as tightly as that photo was clutched in her hand? She hadn't even noticed but the tears were coming down as hard as rain, storms of anger and confusion boiling in her eyes. Why couldn't she keep a hold of those few beautiful moments in time. Breathing life into them when she felt the lights flickering dead. Why couldn't she have all in life that made her happy? Have all those peices fit together with little effort.
Even after all this time she remembered how it was he smelt. The aftershave scent that tickled her nostrils as she used to nuzzle up against his neck. More poinantly she remembered the shivers it sent down her spine, and the butterflies it disturbed in her youthful loin. He had done things to her without even knowing it. His mere presence changed her entire life as it was laid out before her; here, in that exact moment they had shared on this cliffside. Why dammit. Why wouldn't things fall into place as she so dreamed they should be? Back then when it was all about the dark clothes, dark music, dark lifestyle, she invisioned a beautiful dark future for him and her.
As an adult she had to think of the reality, and given the circumstances she didn't feel she had made the wrong choice. Between a man who loves her, and she loves him back. Who had never done her wrong and always went out of his way to do her rightly. Or a man who hurt her most in her life, treaded and left his painful mark on her soul as many times as she had let him. A man whom knew no stabilty, whom swore to try his hand at feidlity for her, rather then pledging it out right. Was she so mad to decide what she did? Yet here she sat, legs out over the edge, dangling as her mind did over the endless pit she had such a hard time staring into.
"WHY!" she cried out over the vast expanse before her. The tone of her voice startling even herself as it spewed forth from her lips. Expelled with the angry propulsion of her pent up rage. Though before the winds, and empty winter sky could answer her she filled the silence with her emotional sobbing. She wasnt entirly sure why she was crying, what it was that caused her pain. All she knew was the feeling of loss again. The feeling of her heart breaking once more as it had so many times in the past. Just the image of his face enough to send her into shoulder racking sobs again. Making something that felt so right, be so incrediblly wrong was the cruelest part of it all. Desire for a dream that was never meant to be in the first place.
(feed back Definatly welcome, and appreicated)
She had been here before; teetering on this proverbial edge. Staring out at the valley they shared together what felt like lifetimes ago. In her hand a photo worn and tattered from her constant nervous wringing. Love was so young back then it felt invincable, and it felt so damn real. Was it just that realness that she was holding onto now, as tightly as that photo was clutched in her hand? She hadn't even noticed but the tears were coming down as hard as rain, storms of anger and confusion boiling in her eyes. Why couldn't she keep a hold of those few beautiful moments in time. Breathing life into them when she felt the lights flickering dead. Why couldn't she have all in life that made her happy? Have all those peices fit together with little effort.
Even after all this time she remembered how it was he smelt. The aftershave scent that tickled her nostrils as she used to nuzzle up against his neck. More poinantly she remembered the shivers it sent down her spine, and the butterflies it disturbed in her youthful loin. He had done things to her without even knowing it. His mere presence changed her entire life as it was laid out before her; here, in that exact moment they had shared on this cliffside. Why dammit. Why wouldn't things fall into place as she so dreamed they should be? Back then when it was all about the dark clothes, dark music, dark lifestyle, she invisioned a beautiful dark future for him and her.
As an adult she had to think of the reality, and given the circumstances she didn't feel she had made the wrong choice. Between a man who loves her, and she loves him back. Who had never done her wrong and always went out of his way to do her rightly. Or a man who hurt her most in her life, treaded and left his painful mark on her soul as many times as she had let him. A man whom knew no stabilty, whom swore to try his hand at feidlity for her, rather then pledging it out right. Was she so mad to decide what she did? Yet here she sat, legs out over the edge, dangling as her mind did over the endless pit she had such a hard time staring into.
"WHY!" she cried out over the vast expanse before her. The tone of her voice startling even herself as it spewed forth from her lips. Expelled with the angry propulsion of her pent up rage. Though before the winds, and empty winter sky could answer her she filled the silence with her emotional sobbing. She wasnt entirly sure why she was crying, what it was that caused her pain. All she knew was the feeling of loss again. The feeling of her heart breaking once more as it had so many times in the past. Just the image of his face enough to send her into shoulder racking sobs again. Making something that felt so right, be so incrediblly wrong was the cruelest part of it all. Desire for a dream that was never meant to be in the first place.