I Don't tell many people this.
The day after Rachel's birthday.
Sadness.....
My biggest fear in life:
The thought that wakes me up at night is my biggest fear. It is not of dragons, or demons or death, for none of these thoughts frighten me. My fear is simply growing up to fast. I am not like most 12 year olds. I have done many things that other kids my age don't even know to think about. Some of the things that i have done i am not so proud of, others i am. But all the same it sends a chill down my spine to think of what comes next for me in life. If i have done thees things already at this point in age, what will come next? What will happen when i am 14.....15? ware will i be when i'm 17 and 18? What is the next step in life, ware do i go from here? Sadly for me it looks as the direction i am heading in life is not one that has a happy ending. Its scares me to think that i am only going to git older, and more advanced for my age. In my life, its like every year i grow 2 years older. And i can never go back, i can only grow up, i can't go back to the simple times in life.
My name is Rachel Burns, and i am 12 years old.
But i act 14.............
When a little kid draws a picture
it is all a big face
and some arms stuck on.
That's their life.
Well, then:
You get older
and your life is a whole mess of things,
new thoughts, sorry feelings,
big plans, enormous doubts,
going along hoping and getting disappointed,
over and over again,
no wonder i don't recognize
my little crayon picture.
It appears to be me,
and it is,
but its not........
There is only one person in the world that i feel understands what i feel about my age.
He is one of my best friends..............well............i don't know, he might even be my best friend, but i haven't known him for that long. He might be my best friend, or me might be just one of my best friends........i don't know.
Anywho......................
He called me last night so i was like
"Yay, finely i get to talk to someone that understands me"
So we talked for about 45 seconds when he says
"hold on a sec. o.K?
And i was like
"sure"
1 minute passed. He gets back on the phone
"O, that was (his girl friend) on the other line.
He said.
"So i have to go, bye"
Says he.
*click*
He hangs up the phone.
I understand he needed to talk to her. Girl friends comes before friends. He can't help it that she called. He had to talk to her. I'm not mad at him. But i just really needed someone to talk to, and it had to be him.
As the days grow longer,
Life grows shorter,
But it sits,
And watches life go by,
One wilted rose stands alone in a shadow.
-Wiltedrose.
Sadness.....
My biggest fear in life:
The thought that wakes me up at night is my biggest fear. It is not of dragons, or demons or death, for none of these thoughts frighten me. My fear is simply growing up to fast. I am not like most 12 year olds. I have done many things that other kids my age don't even know to think about. Some of the things that i have done i am not so proud of, others i am. But all the same it sends a chill down my spine to think of what comes next for me in life. If i have done thees things already at this point in age, what will come next? What will happen when i am 14.....15? ware will i be when i'm 17 and 18? What is the next step in life, ware do i go from here? Sadly for me it looks as the direction i am heading in life is not one that has a happy ending. Its scares me to think that i am only going to git older, and more advanced for my age. In my life, its like every year i grow 2 years older. And i can never go back, i can only grow up, i can't go back to the simple times in life.
My name is Rachel Burns, and i am 12 years old.
But i act 14.............
When a little kid draws a picture
it is all a big face
and some arms stuck on.
That's their life.
Well, then:
You get older
and your life is a whole mess of things,
new thoughts, sorry feelings,
big plans, enormous doubts,
going along hoping and getting disappointed,
over and over again,
no wonder i don't recognize
my little crayon picture.
It appears to be me,
and it is,
but its not........
There is only one person in the world that i feel understands what i feel about my age.
He is one of my best friends..............well............i don't know, he might even be my best friend, but i haven't known him for that long. He might be my best friend, or me might be just one of my best friends........i don't know.
Anywho......................
He called me last night so i was like
"Yay, finely i get to talk to someone that understands me"
So we talked for about 45 seconds when he says
"hold on a sec. o.K?
And i was like
"sure"
1 minute passed. He gets back on the phone
"O, that was (his girl friend) on the other line.
He said.
"So i have to go, bye"
Says he.
*click*
He hangs up the phone.
I understand he needed to talk to her. Girl friends comes before friends. He can't help it that she called. He had to talk to her. I'm not mad at him. But i just really needed someone to talk to, and it had to be him.
As the days grow longer,
Life grows shorter,
But it sits,
And watches life go by,
One wilted rose stands alone in a shadow.
-Wiltedrose.