What does our Generation have to show the world at this point?
My personal history?
The van blowing up in the world trade center- Age 8. I remember being in school that day, and Daniel Nugent worrying about his dad, who worked there.
Oklahoma City Bombing- Age 10, it was April and g-dammit even though we were staying in my uncle's loft in upstate new york, it was officially april and I was going to wear my black bike shorts whether mom liked it or not. It then proceeded to hail that day. I remember eating breakfast in the kitchen as Mom explained what the Oklahoma City building was. I remember injured babies being carried out of the rubble. I remember wondering why someone would attack such an unimportant building in the first place and hurt so many people.
Columbine- Age 14, we were living in Totten Place when I got home from school and heard the news. I remember sitting on the couch and seeing students getting hauled from the building. I remember the black trench coat mafia and the video games and the pipe bombs being made in their rooms. I remember wondering what kind of parents wouldn't question their kids if all their silverware went missing. I remember feeling terrible that these kids were so isolated and lonely that they felt that they couldn't talk to anyone about it and chose to hurt their classmates instead.
September 11th- I remember going to school and the look on Mr. Ryan's face third period when I walked to class and cheerfully said good morning to him. I could tell that something was terribly wrong. I remember wearing my birkenstocks and my favorite yellow tee shirt and khaki shorts. That night I remember calling all the hospitals in NYC trying to track down Louis Arena. I remember refusing to give up hope. I remember Vanessa Tripp wearing her old FDNY tee shirts for months after it happened. I remember visiting the firehouse and taking pictures of ground zero for photo class, with mom. I remember the smell of the subway, that acrid burning plastic smell, and how it makes me nervous and edgy to this day. I still have my greatest pride in photography that day, a wilted flyer advocating world peace, wet with rain.
April 16th, 2007- Mom and Dad's anniversary. I heard about the Tech shooting in the news then I got an email from Matt right away saying that one kid had been killed. I tried to get him to hang in there at work as the number of fatalies kept jumping. I'm sure all he could think about were his friends and classmates there at VTech and what they were going through. He mentioned how all of his friends were Engineers and that made the situation worse. I held him yesterday as he mourned for his fallen classmates, victims in senseless act of violence. When we first met he showed me pictures of the school and stadium, full of pride for his school and its accomplishments, its powerful sports teams. I felt a pang of jealousy as I realized that AU never had that sense of community, and would never have that sense of community. Everyone was too fractured into their cliques, their groups, their sororities, their political agendas. We could never come together as a whole. I'm wearing maroon and orange today realizing I'd never worn AU's colors unless I was on the rugby pitch. I'm glad that I got to get acquainted with Vtech then, so I wouldn't have to learn about his school now, in the news, as they haplessly dragged the injured from the buildings.
I look back on this event now with a sense of irony because my parents were very stressed upon sending me off to college in Washington. They feared for my safety and couldn't understand why I'd move from one potential terrorist target to another. I explained that we cannot let fear dictate our life choices. To this day I refuse to give in to fear. And yesterday we all learned that it really doesn't matter where you go to school, violence of this nature can spring up anywhere. Even in a safe, unassuming college town.
What does our generation have to show for the world? It's been 15 years of this and the pattern is now emerging. We attack ourselves as easily as we attack other nations.
We've been fighting this war on terror and war on poverty and war on drugs so much that we're blinded to what's actually happening to children of America. They have become so invisible in the day to day that the only way they are remembered is through newspaper headlines proclaiming massacre. These people withdraw so far into their own heads that they cannot see past their own hate and frustration and they dehumanize the rest with guns. This kid shot over 60 people - did the reality or gravity of his actions even set in at any time during this?
That being said, as a generation we need to do something about the conditions that exist to breed such anti-socialization and wanton violence. Several people I have spoken with today used the words "homicidal tendencies" when describing America and its attitude towards violence. I so clearly want to disagree with that classification.
The events of yesterday make it very clear that we all need to do something about this systemic violence that rules our sociey. Teach, volunteer, give, ask a stranger how their day is doing. People need to be shown the world is not as inhuman and cruel as they think it is, otherwise we've lost ourselves again to senseless tragedy. I pray that the next 15 years is more peaceful than the last.
The van blowing up in the world trade center- Age 8. I remember being in school that day, and Daniel Nugent worrying about his dad, who worked there.
Oklahoma City Bombing- Age 10, it was April and g-dammit even though we were staying in my uncle's loft in upstate new york, it was officially april and I was going to wear my black bike shorts whether mom liked it or not. It then proceeded to hail that day. I remember eating breakfast in the kitchen as Mom explained what the Oklahoma City building was. I remember injured babies being carried out of the rubble. I remember wondering why someone would attack such an unimportant building in the first place and hurt so many people.
Columbine- Age 14, we were living in Totten Place when I got home from school and heard the news. I remember sitting on the couch and seeing students getting hauled from the building. I remember the black trench coat mafia and the video games and the pipe bombs being made in their rooms. I remember wondering what kind of parents wouldn't question their kids if all their silverware went missing. I remember feeling terrible that these kids were so isolated and lonely that they felt that they couldn't talk to anyone about it and chose to hurt their classmates instead.
September 11th- I remember going to school and the look on Mr. Ryan's face third period when I walked to class and cheerfully said good morning to him. I could tell that something was terribly wrong. I remember wearing my birkenstocks and my favorite yellow tee shirt and khaki shorts. That night I remember calling all the hospitals in NYC trying to track down Louis Arena. I remember refusing to give up hope. I remember Vanessa Tripp wearing her old FDNY tee shirts for months after it happened. I remember visiting the firehouse and taking pictures of ground zero for photo class, with mom. I remember the smell of the subway, that acrid burning plastic smell, and how it makes me nervous and edgy to this day. I still have my greatest pride in photography that day, a wilted flyer advocating world peace, wet with rain.
April 16th, 2007- Mom and Dad's anniversary. I heard about the Tech shooting in the news then I got an email from Matt right away saying that one kid had been killed. I tried to get him to hang in there at work as the number of fatalies kept jumping. I'm sure all he could think about were his friends and classmates there at VTech and what they were going through. He mentioned how all of his friends were Engineers and that made the situation worse. I held him yesterday as he mourned for his fallen classmates, victims in senseless act of violence. When we first met he showed me pictures of the school and stadium, full of pride for his school and its accomplishments, its powerful sports teams. I felt a pang of jealousy as I realized that AU never had that sense of community, and would never have that sense of community. Everyone was too fractured into their cliques, their groups, their sororities, their political agendas. We could never come together as a whole. I'm wearing maroon and orange today realizing I'd never worn AU's colors unless I was on the rugby pitch. I'm glad that I got to get acquainted with Vtech then, so I wouldn't have to learn about his school now, in the news, as they haplessly dragged the injured from the buildings.
I look back on this event now with a sense of irony because my parents were very stressed upon sending me off to college in Washington. They feared for my safety and couldn't understand why I'd move from one potential terrorist target to another. I explained that we cannot let fear dictate our life choices. To this day I refuse to give in to fear. And yesterday we all learned that it really doesn't matter where you go to school, violence of this nature can spring up anywhere. Even in a safe, unassuming college town.
What does our generation have to show for the world? It's been 15 years of this and the pattern is now emerging. We attack ourselves as easily as we attack other nations.
We've been fighting this war on terror and war on poverty and war on drugs so much that we're blinded to what's actually happening to children of America. They have become so invisible in the day to day that the only way they are remembered is through newspaper headlines proclaiming massacre. These people withdraw so far into their own heads that they cannot see past their own hate and frustration and they dehumanize the rest with guns. This kid shot over 60 people - did the reality or gravity of his actions even set in at any time during this?
That being said, as a generation we need to do something about the conditions that exist to breed such anti-socialization and wanton violence. Several people I have spoken with today used the words "homicidal tendencies" when describing America and its attitude towards violence. I so clearly want to disagree with that classification.
The events of yesterday make it very clear that we all need to do something about this systemic violence that rules our sociey. Teach, volunteer, give, ask a stranger how their day is doing. People need to be shown the world is not as inhuman and cruel as they think it is, otherwise we've lost ourselves again to senseless tragedy. I pray that the next 15 years is more peaceful than the last.