Misunderstandings
Title: Misunderstandings
Rating: PG
Pairing/Characters: Levi/Cath (from the novel Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell)
Genre: Drama
Word Count: 586
Summary: Sometimes, learning how you screwed up just makes things a lot worse.
A/N: A Fangirl Missing Moment. Levi POV. Spoilers abound.
For May,a great friend and the closest thing to a real-life muse I'll ever have.
After Cath followed the nurse back down the corridor to see her father, Levi sat looking at the closed door for a good minute. It’s not that he expected her to walk back out, he just couldn’t seem to get his limbs to cooperate.
You didn’t read me wrong.
Levi ran his hand through his hair, gripping it until it was almost painful before pushing himself to his feet and sliding on his jacket. Numbly, he picked up his and Cath’s half-eaten sandwiches and almost-full cups of coffee and dumped them into a trashcan. Then he gave a halfhearted wave to Jeff, the guy at the registration desk, and walked out the front door of the hospital, the cold December air stinging his cheeks immediately. Levi stopped at the bottom of the front steps and turned back toward the door. He was halfway up the steps again when he stopped himself. He couldn’t think of anything to say that would make the situation better. He turned away once more and walked back to his truck.
You didn’t read me wrong.
He climbed into the driver’s seat, but he didn’t start the ignition. Instead, he gripped the steering wheel and leaned his head forward until it touched the top. It had been two weeks since that night in her room. He’d been amazed when Cath had picked up The Outsiders and started reading. He didn’t think there was another person on Earth who would have done that for him. He remembered the huskiness of her voice as it grew hoarse from overuse. He remembered how soft and warm she’d been curled up against him. And then kissing her…
You didn’t read me wrong.
He groaned and sat up. It was an hour to Lincoln and he had a huge final the next morning. He buckled his seat belt and started the ignition. Within minutes, he was on the road back to Lincoln. All this time, he thought he’d misunderstood. When Cath hadn’t texted him back, when she had avoided being in the same room as him, he’d just assumed she’d felt embarrassed about that night. Then he wondered if she was angry with him, that he’d gone too far and taken advantage of her when she was sleepy and vulnerable. That maybe she really had felt exploited.
God, he was a fool. He had really screwed this up. That kiss had meant everything. Jesus. How could she have not known that? How could she have ignored months of him trying desperately to spend time with her? He shook his head. He had done this. But how could he explain the truth to her? How could he convince her of how he felt when she’d seen him kissing another girl just one day later? And how could he convince her that when he said kissing her had meant nothing, he’d been lying? A stupid foolish attempt at self-preservation.
You didn’t read me wrong.
It hadn’t been just a kiss for her either. And it was that thought that gave him hope. Levi resolved right then to try to set things right between them again, to tell her the night he kissed her was one of the greatest nights of his life. He didn’t know if Cath would ever forgive him, but he was determined to try.
Levi pulled his digital recorder out of his pocket and placed it on the dashboard. His professor’s words washed over him as he proceeded down the dark, lonely road back to Lincoln.
Rating: PG
Pairing/Characters: Levi/Cath (from the novel Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell)
Genre: Drama
Word Count: 586
Summary: Sometimes, learning how you screwed up just makes things a lot worse.
A/N: A Fangirl Missing Moment. Levi POV. Spoilers abound.
For May,a great friend and the closest thing to a real-life muse I'll ever have.
After Cath followed the nurse back down the corridor to see her father, Levi sat looking at the closed door for a good minute. It’s not that he expected her to walk back out, he just couldn’t seem to get his limbs to cooperate.
You didn’t read me wrong.
Levi ran his hand through his hair, gripping it until it was almost painful before pushing himself to his feet and sliding on his jacket. Numbly, he picked up his and Cath’s half-eaten sandwiches and almost-full cups of coffee and dumped them into a trashcan. Then he gave a halfhearted wave to Jeff, the guy at the registration desk, and walked out the front door of the hospital, the cold December air stinging his cheeks immediately. Levi stopped at the bottom of the front steps and turned back toward the door. He was halfway up the steps again when he stopped himself. He couldn’t think of anything to say that would make the situation better. He turned away once more and walked back to his truck.
You didn’t read me wrong.
He climbed into the driver’s seat, but he didn’t start the ignition. Instead, he gripped the steering wheel and leaned his head forward until it touched the top. It had been two weeks since that night in her room. He’d been amazed when Cath had picked up The Outsiders and started reading. He didn’t think there was another person on Earth who would have done that for him. He remembered the huskiness of her voice as it grew hoarse from overuse. He remembered how soft and warm she’d been curled up against him. And then kissing her…
You didn’t read me wrong.
He groaned and sat up. It was an hour to Lincoln and he had a huge final the next morning. He buckled his seat belt and started the ignition. Within minutes, he was on the road back to Lincoln. All this time, he thought he’d misunderstood. When Cath hadn’t texted him back, when she had avoided being in the same room as him, he’d just assumed she’d felt embarrassed about that night. Then he wondered if she was angry with him, that he’d gone too far and taken advantage of her when she was sleepy and vulnerable. That maybe she really had felt exploited.
God, he was a fool. He had really screwed this up. That kiss had meant everything. Jesus. How could she have not known that? How could she have ignored months of him trying desperately to spend time with her? He shook his head. He had done this. But how could he explain the truth to her? How could he convince her of how he felt when she’d seen him kissing another girl just one day later? And how could he convince her that when he said kissing her had meant nothing, he’d been lying? A stupid foolish attempt at self-preservation.
You didn’t read me wrong.
It hadn’t been just a kiss for her either. And it was that thought that gave him hope. Levi resolved right then to try to set things right between them again, to tell her the night he kissed her was one of the greatest nights of his life. He didn’t know if Cath would ever forgive him, but he was determined to try.
Levi pulled his digital recorder out of his pocket and placed it on the dashboard. His professor’s words washed over him as he proceeded down the dark, lonely road back to Lincoln.