Updateosity
It's the first of May, first of May.... (Jonathan Coulton fans can fill in the rest. Not that I'm likely to be doing any of that anytime soon, at least not outdoors.)
I know that I posted in January when my father-in-law had a stroke. He was in ICU for three weeks, unconscious or barely conscious for most of that time. But he came out of it and went to a well-known Manhattan rehab center for six weeks, where he worked incredibly hard and regained a lot of his mental and physical function. Then he "graduated" from rehab to "sub-acute" care, which means, basically, a nursing home. He went to a place near his home on Long Island. It seemed like a really nice place. I don't know what went wrong, but he never did well there; he fell out of bed the first night. Over the three weeks he was there, he became increasingly confused to the point of dementia -- but the staff failed to recognize there was anything wrong with him. My mother-in-law basically had to have a hissy fit to have him admitted to the hospital.
At that point (the beginning of April), I asked my mother-in-law if she'd like me to come out and stay with her for a week or so and help out. She said yes, please. So I went, and three days later, he died. Which was awful -- but I'm glad I was there; I can't imagine how much worse it would have been if she'd been alone.
Everyone came out for the memorial service, which was beautiful and PACKED. I wasn't surprised, but it was still nice to see what an impact my father-in-law had on so many people. Four of his five children, including my spouse, spoke about him, as did my mother-in-law and three of his closest friends. Two topics that came up in every speech were his love of the Mets and his disdain for organized religion -- and everyone but my spouse used that word, "disdain." And the only reason my spouse didn't use it was that I edited it out of his eulogy, thinking it was a little harsh.
So now we have a memorial drinking game, where every time we hear the word "disdain," we take a gulp of whatever we're drinking in my father-in-law's honor. We all miss him so much -- I probably far less than any of the rest of the family; it's really hard on my spouse, whose impulse is to give him a call during every Mets game, as they'd done during almost every game for years and years.
Still, I'm awfully lucky to have known him for as long as I did.
The worst part is knowing that eventually I'll have to face this with my own parents. Pulling protective bubble of denial tightly over self now.
Anyway, on the way home from Long Island, we all got the flu -- I thought I'd escaped it because I'd gotten the flu shot last fall, but I wound up coming down with it last week -- and I had signed up months ago to give the sermon in church this past Sunday. I got it done, though. And what did I choose to talk about? "Buffy and the Heroine's Journey." I got to show off my Buffy action figures in church!
And that's enough of a brain dump for this morning. If you've read this far, please know that although I post rarely these days and comment only occasionally, I do read my flist almost every day, and I so appreciate seeing everyone's posts. This community continues to mean a lot to me.
Happy May, everyone!
I know that I posted in January when my father-in-law had a stroke. He was in ICU for three weeks, unconscious or barely conscious for most of that time. But he came out of it and went to a well-known Manhattan rehab center for six weeks, where he worked incredibly hard and regained a lot of his mental and physical function. Then he "graduated" from rehab to "sub-acute" care, which means, basically, a nursing home. He went to a place near his home on Long Island. It seemed like a really nice place. I don't know what went wrong, but he never did well there; he fell out of bed the first night. Over the three weeks he was there, he became increasingly confused to the point of dementia -- but the staff failed to recognize there was anything wrong with him. My mother-in-law basically had to have a hissy fit to have him admitted to the hospital.
At that point (the beginning of April), I asked my mother-in-law if she'd like me to come out and stay with her for a week or so and help out. She said yes, please. So I went, and three days later, he died. Which was awful -- but I'm glad I was there; I can't imagine how much worse it would have been if she'd been alone.
Everyone came out for the memorial service, which was beautiful and PACKED. I wasn't surprised, but it was still nice to see what an impact my father-in-law had on so many people. Four of his five children, including my spouse, spoke about him, as did my mother-in-law and three of his closest friends. Two topics that came up in every speech were his love of the Mets and his disdain for organized religion -- and everyone but my spouse used that word, "disdain." And the only reason my spouse didn't use it was that I edited it out of his eulogy, thinking it was a little harsh.
So now we have a memorial drinking game, where every time we hear the word "disdain," we take a gulp of whatever we're drinking in my father-in-law's honor. We all miss him so much -- I probably far less than any of the rest of the family; it's really hard on my spouse, whose impulse is to give him a call during every Mets game, as they'd done during almost every game for years and years.
Still, I'm awfully lucky to have known him for as long as I did.
The worst part is knowing that eventually I'll have to face this with my own parents. Pulling protective bubble of denial tightly over self now.
Anyway, on the way home from Long Island, we all got the flu -- I thought I'd escaped it because I'd gotten the flu shot last fall, but I wound up coming down with it last week -- and I had signed up months ago to give the sermon in church this past Sunday. I got it done, though. And what did I choose to talk about? "Buffy and the Heroine's Journey." I got to show off my Buffy action figures in church!
And that's enough of a brain dump for this morning. If you've read this far, please know that although I post rarely these days and comment only occasionally, I do read my flist almost every day, and I so appreciate seeing everyone's posts. This community continues to mean a lot to me.
Happy May, everyone!