Shit six weeks...
Oh my god, where has the six weeks gone? Things went by in such a blur I can't remember seeing it fly past me.. but of course parts reach out and touch my heart with its stabbing sweetness. Forgive me journal, for I have neglected you.
I can't believe it is nearly Christmas. When I was a child, Christmas was a time of magic and wonderful smells. That was before I figured out Santa Claus was a fake - then all that remained was the rich aroma of roasting turkey, the noxious fumes of the mulled wine, the fresh resinous scent of the Christmas tree. But of course it was never the same.
When I grew older Christmas meant nothing to me; it was just another day in the hazy cycle of needing drugs, getting a hit, and lying drugged out until it wore off, then the cycle began again.
Now, I just want to feel warm again. I don't need it to be like it used to be when I was a kid; I just want to be happy.
But first of all - I need to re-register.
I can't believe it is nearly Christmas. When I was a child, Christmas was a time of magic and wonderful smells. That was before I figured out Santa Claus was a fake - then all that remained was the rich aroma of roasting turkey, the noxious fumes of the mulled wine, the fresh resinous scent of the Christmas tree. But of course it was never the same.
When I grew older Christmas meant nothing to me; it was just another day in the hazy cycle of needing drugs, getting a hit, and lying drugged out until it wore off, then the cycle began again.
Now, I just want to feel warm again. I don't need it to be like it used to be when I was a kid; I just want to be happy.
But first of all - I need to re-register.