"...You'll Never Know What It Could Have Been..."

[will_is_lost]

Wow... There are so many things I want to say. That I feel like need to be said. That i think I need to say... but I also feel like I can't. 180o! Tonight was awesome because my car is incapacitated, which means I require a ride from someone, namely, Andrew. I forgot how awesome the rides had been, all the talking that gets done. Its amazing how much better you can feel at the end of the night after just talking to someone. Throw Ryan in the mix and you have a car full of emo and plenty of conversation to go around. Watchtower study was a little better this week... a little. It was nice to have Laura (Mum) there, she always has really good comments. Always nice to see Rolando, rare tho it may be. Haven't seen Cail in a while either. Emily seemed to be in a bad mood, think I know why but oh well. Can't control what people do, just have to deal with them. Put on a fake smile, be nice, be as friendly as tolerable. Peanut butter cookies.. mmm... (Thanx Chels) The ride home was just as good as the ride there if not even better, haha, I'm almost kinda glad my car is messed up. Mt. Dew, walk down to the park... freezing... walk back to the car. More awesome conversation. Now thats all over and I am here. I have to work tomorrow so I should be sleeping, but the thought of you keeps me waiting... waiting for what? I don't even know, and eventhough you're not going to hear this, for some reason I feel the need to say it... I miss you. I don't want to "go down that road to emotional overdose", but I can't help the way I think I'm feeling. Whats worse, or could be better is that I'm not sure, one things for sure... It'll keep me from taking action on it. Is that a good thing? Or a bad thing? Who knows... all I know is that I want to be happy, but we can't always get what we want, so I have nights like tonight to remind me of how good of friends I have and that it is possible to be happy and not to be "with" someone. I think one person that is going to read this will know who it's about... I kinda like it that way.

"These petals decide what's next for you and I..." -There's No Penguins In Alaska, Chiodos