Resurrection...with gift baskets!
Golly, it's sure nice to be missed.
You should have seen the faces of the Sunnydale City Council when I walked into the room a couple of weeks ago. Priceless. I honestly think one of them had an accident, from the grimace on his face.
Though I can't blame them. Sunnydale's prodigal son returns, literally from the dead? They couldn't have known the dead part, but the rest would probably be a little shocking to the system.
I'd say about half the council had been held over from my first term in office, as it were. The other half were bright, fresh, shining new faces. I remember, there used to be a D'byeh demon on the council, years and years ago. Nice fellow. Made a scrumptious bacon and onion dip. Got eaten by a Klyntohn demon later on. Very sad.
I'd thought about claiming I was my own son...again...like I usually do. I'm pretty sure I could have rustled up some Richard Wilkins IV identification on the spur of the moment. But heck, the surprise was half the fun!
And after my "coming back in" party during the council meeting, I was put up in a pretty swanky hotel on the city dime. After all, I couldn't well go straight back into the mayor's office, now, could I? Only till my assets caught up with me, I told them...no sense leeching off the taxpayers unless you really need the blood, I used to say.
So after a day or so of relaxing at the Sunnydale Hilton and a couple of completely unintuitive interviews -- and going through a few absolutely scrumptious gift baskets from various well-wishers -- I managed to access my nest egg. That's what I called my emergency reserves that I'd been saving for years before my untimely demise. A few days later, voila! My own private penthouse, and now I'm a private citizen again.
I hear the last tenant really trashed the place a few years ago. Some crazy blonde woman with a fetish for midgets. Sorry I missed that.
Now, do I have some choices to ponder here. Must get back in the swing of things...otherwise, I'll go positively bananas up here, all alone, with nothing to do. And I'm sure the Slayer and her little band of hooligans have noticed I'm back by now...I'm sure they'll come a-calling any day. Must be ready for that.
Not that I don't want to see what kind of lovely young harlot Miss Summers has grown into after all these years. But there's a time and a place for everything, and right now, I'm simply not ready to entertain company like that.
Speaking of Slayers, though...
...I must say, I'm reminded of my Faith as I walk around my new quarters. I remember her face when I presented her with her own first apartment downtown, how she put up a tough facade as I could tell she was taken with all the shine on the walls.
I do so miss my Faith. But like I said, there'll be time enough for everything later.
Besides, I wouldn't be much of a role model if I wasn't able to get my priorities straight myself, now, would I?
Time to make a couple of calls...
You should have seen the faces of the Sunnydale City Council when I walked into the room a couple of weeks ago. Priceless. I honestly think one of them had an accident, from the grimace on his face.
Though I can't blame them. Sunnydale's prodigal son returns, literally from the dead? They couldn't have known the dead part, but the rest would probably be a little shocking to the system.
I'd say about half the council had been held over from my first term in office, as it were. The other half were bright, fresh, shining new faces. I remember, there used to be a D'byeh demon on the council, years and years ago. Nice fellow. Made a scrumptious bacon and onion dip. Got eaten by a Klyntohn demon later on. Very sad.
I'd thought about claiming I was my own son...again...like I usually do. I'm pretty sure I could have rustled up some Richard Wilkins IV identification on the spur of the moment. But heck, the surprise was half the fun!
And after my "coming back in" party during the council meeting, I was put up in a pretty swanky hotel on the city dime. After all, I couldn't well go straight back into the mayor's office, now, could I? Only till my assets caught up with me, I told them...no sense leeching off the taxpayers unless you really need the blood, I used to say.
So after a day or so of relaxing at the Sunnydale Hilton and a couple of completely unintuitive interviews -- and going through a few absolutely scrumptious gift baskets from various well-wishers -- I managed to access my nest egg. That's what I called my emergency reserves that I'd been saving for years before my untimely demise. A few days later, voila! My own private penthouse, and now I'm a private citizen again.
I hear the last tenant really trashed the place a few years ago. Some crazy blonde woman with a fetish for midgets. Sorry I missed that.
Now, do I have some choices to ponder here. Must get back in the swing of things...otherwise, I'll go positively bananas up here, all alone, with nothing to do. And I'm sure the Slayer and her little band of hooligans have noticed I'm back by now...I'm sure they'll come a-calling any day. Must be ready for that.
Not that I don't want to see what kind of lovely young harlot Miss Summers has grown into after all these years. But there's a time and a place for everything, and right now, I'm simply not ready to entertain company like that.
Speaking of Slayers, though...
...I must say, I'm reminded of my Faith as I walk around my new quarters. I remember her face when I presented her with her own first apartment downtown, how she put up a tough facade as I could tell she was taken with all the shine on the walls.
I do so miss my Faith. But like I said, there'll be time enough for everything later.
Besides, I wouldn't be much of a role model if I wasn't able to get my priorities straight myself, now, would I?
Time to make a couple of calls...