random mutterings
I spend hours upon hours of my life bored and alone. I'm thinking of joining a commune.
I feel like my life so far has just been killing time, and will continue that way until... I don't know what. Something. Some big revelation that will hurl me up, dust me off and nudge me in the right direction. I think the reason I stay up so late is that I'm just waiting for something to happen. Of course it never does; I mean what's going to happen to someone stuck in a house with three annoying sleeping people at four in the morning?
I can't keep my mind on anything for more than an hour, maximum. It makes it hard to do anything.
I spend all day doing nothing and just thinking, so why won't my brain shut up when I want to go to bed? And why does it take me four hours to get to sleep, and another four to wake up?
Why am I so smart when it comes to crap like chemistry and maths, but so stupid when it comes to everything else?
When I'm lying in bed trying to sleep I sometimes like to plan my day. I'll get up at 11 or 12. I'll do a bit of exercise (I really need to get fitter), then have a shower. I'll do a bit of work for uni. Have a bit of a go on the drums before it's too late (terrace houses aren't the bst place for drum kits). Maybe I'll look for a job, I really need one. I should cancel my old phone plan too, so I can get a new phone. Then I'll go to bed at a decent time, and I'll sleep well, knowing I've had a fulfilling day that hopefully moved me someway to getting out of this holding pattern I'm stuck in.
The reality is I'll sleep in until 5, get up, then watch TV and go online for hours, until crashing. Then I'll feel guilty and promise myself tomorrow will be different.
I feel like my life so far has just been killing time, and will continue that way until... I don't know what. Something. Some big revelation that will hurl me up, dust me off and nudge me in the right direction. I think the reason I stay up so late is that I'm just waiting for something to happen. Of course it never does; I mean what's going to happen to someone stuck in a house with three annoying sleeping people at four in the morning?
I can't keep my mind on anything for more than an hour, maximum. It makes it hard to do anything.
I spend all day doing nothing and just thinking, so why won't my brain shut up when I want to go to bed? And why does it take me four hours to get to sleep, and another four to wake up?
Why am I so smart when it comes to crap like chemistry and maths, but so stupid when it comes to everything else?
When I'm lying in bed trying to sleep I sometimes like to plan my day. I'll get up at 11 or 12. I'll do a bit of exercise (I really need to get fitter), then have a shower. I'll do a bit of work for uni. Have a bit of a go on the drums before it's too late (terrace houses aren't the bst place for drum kits). Maybe I'll look for a job, I really need one. I should cancel my old phone plan too, so I can get a new phone. Then I'll go to bed at a decent time, and I'll sleep well, knowing I've had a fulfilling day that hopefully moved me someway to getting out of this holding pattern I'm stuck in.
The reality is I'll sleep in until 5, get up, then watch TV and go online for hours, until crashing. Then I'll feel guilty and promise myself tomorrow will be different.