What the fuck do you mean it's Thursday already?
So I came to this horrible realization as the clock passed midnight that it was Thursday. As in I move into my dorm tomorrow and have to leave my mother to take care of herself. Basically, my father got diagnosed with MRSA today and can't do too much to help her out. Not that he really does anyway.
He basically just sits there and tells her she can't do stuff, says he'll do it for her and then if he ever does do it, he does it like 30 minutes later. He's finally letting her drive, even though the doctor said she could, not that he could really stop her but mom can't get into a fight with him right now cause it would just be bad for her.
Now, he in all his genius, has finally realized that my mother intents to go back to work. I don't know why he didn't think she would, since she's been saying all along that she intends to.
I'm really excited to go back to school. New school, more friends, all around I think I'll fit in well at UC. I'm just terrified that my mother will need me and I won't even have a car to get to her.
They're not doing the chemo down at University Hospital either, they're doing it in West Chester. Which is great for gas, but sucks cause it means I won't get to see her that much. I know it bothered her that I came home every weekend when I was at WSU, because she knew that I wasn't really happy being there. So I told her I'd try to come home every other weekend or on weekends where there wasn't a football game, but I don't know if I'll be able to stand knowing that she's sick and such.
I'm just glad that _kyri , lighttomoyo , and melodious_me will all be there. Not to mention all my friends from High School and the other rennies in the area. It's just so stressful. The worst part- The worst part is that I can't even tell my mother that I'm super stressed out because that will just make her feel guilty. And it's not ALL her that's stressing me out. There's the normal stuff that goes with starting at somewhere new. I'm nervous about meeting people, I'm nervous about NOT meeting people. I'm terrified that my one roommate is an anti-social monster, I'm terrified the room itself will be a monster. (because i've never actually seen a room in that hall) One of my best friends commutes and won't be there, one of my friends lives down the street and parties A LOT. (not always a bad thing, a girl needs to unwind.) But all of this on top of having to keep how Ridiculously stressed out I am down just makes me all panicky. Which hasn't happened in a while. The panicky thing.
I am now running my self a hot bath and will soak in bubbles then go to sleep. I'll get up and be a crazy person in the morning right?
P.S. melodious_me : I have a sweet ass tv. We will have to have tv time together...like say Tuesday nights. :D and btw do you like grey's anatomy? (It's so girly but I loves it)
P.S.S. Why are stressed and rushed both the little mad face? I am both stressed and rushed but the little mad face does not appropriatly depict what my face looks like. It's more like a blank stare, then the begining of worry lines. Get it right LJ, get it right.
He basically just sits there and tells her she can't do stuff, says he'll do it for her and then if he ever does do it, he does it like 30 minutes later. He's finally letting her drive, even though the doctor said she could, not that he could really stop her but mom can't get into a fight with him right now cause it would just be bad for her.
Now, he in all his genius, has finally realized that my mother intents to go back to work. I don't know why he didn't think she would, since she's been saying all along that she intends to.
I'm really excited to go back to school. New school, more friends, all around I think I'll fit in well at UC. I'm just terrified that my mother will need me and I won't even have a car to get to her.
They're not doing the chemo down at University Hospital either, they're doing it in West Chester. Which is great for gas, but sucks cause it means I won't get to see her that much. I know it bothered her that I came home every weekend when I was at WSU, because she knew that I wasn't really happy being there. So I told her I'd try to come home every other weekend or on weekends where there wasn't a football game, but I don't know if I'll be able to stand knowing that she's sick and such.
I'm just glad that _kyri , lighttomoyo , and melodious_me will all be there. Not to mention all my friends from High School and the other rennies in the area. It's just so stressful. The worst part- The worst part is that I can't even tell my mother that I'm super stressed out because that will just make her feel guilty. And it's not ALL her that's stressing me out. There's the normal stuff that goes with starting at somewhere new. I'm nervous about meeting people, I'm nervous about NOT meeting people. I'm terrified that my one roommate is an anti-social monster, I'm terrified the room itself will be a monster. (because i've never actually seen a room in that hall) One of my best friends commutes and won't be there, one of my friends lives down the street and parties A LOT. (not always a bad thing, a girl needs to unwind.) But all of this on top of having to keep how Ridiculously stressed out I am down just makes me all panicky. Which hasn't happened in a while. The panicky thing.
I am now running my self a hot bath and will soak in bubbles then go to sleep. I'll get up and be a crazy person in the morning right?
P.S. melodious_me : I have a sweet ass tv. We will have to have tv time together...like say Tuesday nights. :D and btw do you like grey's anatomy? (It's so girly but I loves it)
P.S.S. Why are stressed and rushed both the little mad face? I am both stressed and rushed but the little mad face does not appropriatly depict what my face looks like. It's more like a blank stare, then the begining of worry lines. Get it right LJ, get it right.