Wow 10 weeks have gone by...
Where to begin is an interesting thought because so much has happened to me this past summer that it is mind-boggling.
Orientation has come and gone and I am officially a campus celebrity. I love it, to put it in the least way noted. I finally have friends on campus that I hang out with now and it feels great. We party, tailgate, football game it, did I mention party yet? Yes I think I did and I absolutely love walking on campus and having people know my name and recognize me (especially when I don't know their name, it makes me on the popular list and I love it! lol).
Also the boy realm has been rather interesting. Army guy is gone and that's that. It would be lying to say that I didn't get hurt but I learned and matured a lot with him and I would not undo anything that happened.
Popularity again...very popular male specimen at school that is gorgeous asked me out and I agreed to it but we are not going to go out because he has a sorostitute girlfriend and I'm not going to be "that girl," the one who fools around with taken men no matter how attractive he is. However I will admit that I almost did and then some. Oh well.
My next round of student teaching hours starts tomorrow and I am pumped. I cannot wait to be in the classroom again and teaching people. I definitely know that is my calling, well one of my callings. I have recently been really questioning a lot of things such as what my calling is. I asked myself the question, "If I could be doing anything I wanted as my career what it would be, the world is open to me so I need to take it and grab it, what are you going to do if you could have it all?" The first thought that came to mind was going to Italy and teaching about art history and culture. The very first thought. It wasn't helping kids learn math or teaching humanities to high school kids. It was discussing art and culture, something that I love a lot and know a great deal about. So I ask myself why am I not doing this? I came to the conclusion that I would not know where to begin nor would I want to have to start all over again when I am so close to being done with my current degrees.
As kids we are always told we can do whatever we want because the world is ours, we are all capable of becoming anything and being the best. Well when you go to college and people tell you to work and work, make sure you go into a career that will get you a job, pick something that you are good at and know about already, take a risk but always have a backup copy saved...how does this fit into the little kid phrase "you can be anything you put your mind to, the world is yours to take?"
I presented to over 1000 people during Orientation and it was amazing. I got on the stage with a microphone and powerpoint clicker in hand and I talked to new EMU families and students. The room was packed and it was standing room only and the audience applauded and laughed when they were supposed to and it was absolutely amazing. My public fear of speaking went way down hill when prestiged faculty congratulated me and told me how amazing I was earlier in the day, I was even better than the person with the doctorate that spoke before me and that felt so good. The hidden point that I am getting to is that one of these people spoke on another day during Orientation that I watched (well I had to be there to run the program, but I actually listened to this guy) and he said something that really got me thinking. He had a slide with a range of years listed. Mine would like: 9-1-04 to 12-20-08
He said to consider what those dates mean. I started on the first set of numbers at Eastern and roughly graduated on the second set of numbers. He elaborated to say that what is important is not what those end dates are but what happens in between those that make me who I am. I have been rushing to finish school and for what reason? I work all the time and for what reason? I don't go out and make friends for what reason? To get done early so I can have bragging rights for graduating in under 4 years? Whoopdedo. Seriously. What he said really hit home for me and I realized that the happiest two weeks of my life for the past year were the weeks that I was currently living during Orientation. I was having fun, making friendships, shaping myself into the person I was growing into, the woman that I was meant to be. Yes I realize this sounds all philosophical research paper like but having an experience like I encountered while being a leader and having people listening to you really makes you think about things.
People know me now and I love it. I requested Saturday's off of work so I can hang out with friens at school, go to football games, and party. I have not had a set of friends like this since high school and I told one of my friends, "I never meet guys or have any luck with them, nor do I make new friends" and she replied to me, "What, that makes no sense. You are cute and you had guys all around you tonight." It got me thinking. I hang out with applebee's people. The same people all the time. I never meet anybody new. School has new people. I am now well-known on campus. My face is seen everywhere. People know me and I am really proud of it because I am known as somebody good and for good things. Not because I slept with the most popular guy who has a sorostitute girlfriend (which I could have done and people thought I was going to do but I didn't) and I am proud of that.
I finally feel like I am growing towards a purpose. It is hard not living at school but at the same time I am getting by with not living there and making friends. Yes it is harder to form friendships and keep them because I don't like feeling like a moocher, but it is worth it. I am finally happy.
Yes, I am happy now.
Orientation has come and gone and I am officially a campus celebrity. I love it, to put it in the least way noted. I finally have friends on campus that I hang out with now and it feels great. We party, tailgate, football game it, did I mention party yet? Yes I think I did and I absolutely love walking on campus and having people know my name and recognize me (especially when I don't know their name, it makes me on the popular list and I love it! lol).
Also the boy realm has been rather interesting. Army guy is gone and that's that. It would be lying to say that I didn't get hurt but I learned and matured a lot with him and I would not undo anything that happened.
Popularity again...very popular male specimen at school that is gorgeous asked me out and I agreed to it but we are not going to go out because he has a sorostitute girlfriend and I'm not going to be "that girl," the one who fools around with taken men no matter how attractive he is. However I will admit that I almost did and then some. Oh well.
My next round of student teaching hours starts tomorrow and I am pumped. I cannot wait to be in the classroom again and teaching people. I definitely know that is my calling, well one of my callings. I have recently been really questioning a lot of things such as what my calling is. I asked myself the question, "If I could be doing anything I wanted as my career what it would be, the world is open to me so I need to take it and grab it, what are you going to do if you could have it all?" The first thought that came to mind was going to Italy and teaching about art history and culture. The very first thought. It wasn't helping kids learn math or teaching humanities to high school kids. It was discussing art and culture, something that I love a lot and know a great deal about. So I ask myself why am I not doing this? I came to the conclusion that I would not know where to begin nor would I want to have to start all over again when I am so close to being done with my current degrees.
As kids we are always told we can do whatever we want because the world is ours, we are all capable of becoming anything and being the best. Well when you go to college and people tell you to work and work, make sure you go into a career that will get you a job, pick something that you are good at and know about already, take a risk but always have a backup copy saved...how does this fit into the little kid phrase "you can be anything you put your mind to, the world is yours to take?"
I presented to over 1000 people during Orientation and it was amazing. I got on the stage with a microphone and powerpoint clicker in hand and I talked to new EMU families and students. The room was packed and it was standing room only and the audience applauded and laughed when they were supposed to and it was absolutely amazing. My public fear of speaking went way down hill when prestiged faculty congratulated me and told me how amazing I was earlier in the day, I was even better than the person with the doctorate that spoke before me and that felt so good. The hidden point that I am getting to is that one of these people spoke on another day during Orientation that I watched (well I had to be there to run the program, but I actually listened to this guy) and he said something that really got me thinking. He had a slide with a range of years listed. Mine would like: 9-1-04 to 12-20-08
He said to consider what those dates mean. I started on the first set of numbers at Eastern and roughly graduated on the second set of numbers. He elaborated to say that what is important is not what those end dates are but what happens in between those that make me who I am. I have been rushing to finish school and for what reason? I work all the time and for what reason? I don't go out and make friends for what reason? To get done early so I can have bragging rights for graduating in under 4 years? Whoopdedo. Seriously. What he said really hit home for me and I realized that the happiest two weeks of my life for the past year were the weeks that I was currently living during Orientation. I was having fun, making friendships, shaping myself into the person I was growing into, the woman that I was meant to be. Yes I realize this sounds all philosophical research paper like but having an experience like I encountered while being a leader and having people listening to you really makes you think about things.
People know me now and I love it. I requested Saturday's off of work so I can hang out with friens at school, go to football games, and party. I have not had a set of friends like this since high school and I told one of my friends, "I never meet guys or have any luck with them, nor do I make new friends" and she replied to me, "What, that makes no sense. You are cute and you had guys all around you tonight." It got me thinking. I hang out with applebee's people. The same people all the time. I never meet anybody new. School has new people. I am now well-known on campus. My face is seen everywhere. People know me and I am really proud of it because I am known as somebody good and for good things. Not because I slept with the most popular guy who has a sorostitute girlfriend (which I could have done and people thought I was going to do but I didn't) and I am proud of that.
I finally feel like I am growing towards a purpose. It is hard not living at school but at the same time I am getting by with not living there and making friends. Yes it is harder to form friendships and keep them because I don't like feeling like a moocher, but it is worth it. I am finally happy.
Yes, I am happy now.