(no subject)
Ahhhhh, I am saddened by the fact that it's so late in the night, or so early in the morning, and everything reminds me that I want to be up and doing what I might want to do later. That I have all the options in the world right now, and perhaps all the time, but I have nothing to do! And nothing but hope for things I could not have. That's words to describe what I am right now, that's time for tomorrow, time to create things, a way to feel satisfied. I want to go crazy and participate in all that singing but I can't sing!
And I have a powerful laptop here, with access to the internet and all that nice stuff. I know eventually I will fall, and fall hard. RIght now I feel the fringes of the darkness creeping. But the night is misleading. This morning and the whole day I felt fine. I feel perfectly all right and so content, and I was trying to remember the last time I felt I couldn't be normal even in the day, and that was maybe 2 months ago. The circle has not turned yet, and I hope it never does.
And I have a powerful laptop here, with access to the internet and all that nice stuff. I know eventually I will fall, and fall hard. RIght now I feel the fringes of the darkness creeping. But the night is misleading. This morning and the whole day I felt fine. I feel perfectly all right and so content, and I was trying to remember the last time I felt I couldn't be normal even in the day, and that was maybe 2 months ago. The circle has not turned yet, and I hope it never does.