[ooc] FIC, WORK IN PROGRESS, NOT DONE ETC
Taken HEAVILY from IM roleplays with hagyjbeken.
-
...Well this was new.
Austria had had Italy as an underling, but Italy was a child. Clearly needed to be disciplined; the thing was just incorrigible. But Hungary was around his age. And honestly looking... a bit shaken up. He showed her to her room, opening the door for her to allow her in first.
“These are your quarters. This is where you'll be sleeping; it's equipped with a bath and you will have chambermaids to help. I'll be needing you to help the maids and cooks with housework, but you'll still be tended to as well.”
He watched her as she sat on the edge of the bed, smiling awkwardly. “Thank you,” she said, a bit wary. “That shouldn’t be a problem.”
He allowed himself to enter the room to open a window, briefly muttering that it could get a little stuffy. Catching sight of her again, he noticed that she was looking at him rather expectantly. He frowned. “Is there something you needed?”
She hesitated before replying: “...Is that all you needed of me?”
Roderich frowned even further, bewildered. “I can’t think of anything at the moment... I will let you get settled for a few days before I start assigning chores.” His eyes lit up when the thought occurred to him. “Oh - Italy is also living here. If you could help me in looking after her, I’d appreciate it. She is a bit a handful, I’m warning you...”
She still stared, as if that wasn’t the answer she’d expected, or wanted.
“...Am I bothering you?” He finally asked.
She flopped herself back onto the bed, eyeing him. “You’re just going to leave me be?”
He tilted his head just slightly. “Of course, why wouldn’t I...?” He studied her a bit, trying to figure out what exactly...
Oh.
“U-Ungarn, please, you don’t need - please do not feel obligated to provide any other sort of service to me.” He averted his eyes, blushing wildly. There was something about her posture, or complete lack thereof - her body language, lying there on the bed expectantly. Her legs dangling haphazardly, so incongruous to look at when covered completely by that pretty little green dress of hers. It mortified him. “...Frankly, I’d advise against such thoughts. It’s unbecoming.” Really, how dare she; the thought hadn’t crossed his mind at all until she’d suggested it herself. “Now. Is there anything else you need before I leave?”
He heard the rustling of fabric and looked over again to find her sitting up, decent posture restored. “...You’re strange, you know.” But it was said with a smile. Almost grateful.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Elizaveta lowered her eyes, half-smiling. “Sadik... wouldn’t have hesitated to do as he wished. You looked away.” She looked up, blushing slightly, shaking the thought. “It’s just weird, is all.”
Roderich’s confused, almost offended expression fell, turning to one of pity, whether she would have wanted any or not. His eyes were soft, finally understanding, and he stepped closer to stand next to the bed, maintaining a respectful distance but still wanting to reassure. “...Your presence here will not be tied to that sort of thing, I assure you. I would think that doing so would distract from productivity in this household. I am only interested in your help around the house so that things run smoothly and profitably.”
The half-smile from before became genuine. “I think I can manage that, then. As long as I have no worries about being thrown to the jackals.”
He suppressed a smile of his own. “Nothing of the sort. Dinner will be at five; would you like some coffee or tea sent to your room before then?”
Hungary was relieved, he could tell, and it made him a bit proud of himself for being honorable in this situation. “Coffee sounds rather nice right now,” she sighed, reclining on the bed again - normally, this time. “Cream and sugar, please, but only a bit.”
She was quite pretty, he admitted silently.
He could have.
But it wouldn’t have been right. Not to mention he wouldn’t quite know where to start - as much as his empire was strengthened by marriages, it was restricted mostly to his royalty, and he himself wasn’t very experienced at all. Aside from mild experimentation with Spain and a few favors here and there to quell any accusations from his allies of being a tease, he kept mostly to himself. He’d never made love to anyone, and he’d be damned if the first time was out of some sort of obligation. Prudish as he was, he did indeed contemplate these things, and it was firmly decided that it needed to mean something. And god, he barely knew her. Not since childhood, not since she teased and beat him. Not since he’d finally realized she was a girl and taken it upon himself to climb his mountains to bring her the prettiest Edelweiss he could find, only to be met with a blank stare and more teasing.
As much as he didn’t regret his decision to be respectful, he vaguely wondered how it was that now she was the one offering herself, and he was the one refusing.
He’d grown up, was all. He’d learned to be more reserved, and he’d learned that stoicism is best and that it’s not smart to go risking your life simply to pick a flower for a girl.
“Thank you,” she added, breaking his reverie. “Sincerely, thank you.”
And he lost any lingering second thoughts. This was how it should be. “No need to thank me, really. I’ll have your coffee sent up; it should arrive shortly.” He smiled at her before heading out the door, feeling a bit of relief himself. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
“Until dinner, then,” she replied, her voice sweet to his ear.
-
Time passed; Elizaveta had fought for him, fought for his queen. Maria Theresa had been like a mother to him, and she had come and gone faster than Roderich could bear. Haydn had made him laugh, and so had Mozart - oh, Mozart; he and Constanze were just the most beautiful, beautiful stunning couple, he’d muse, and Elizaveta would sometimes wonder just what the fixation was all about. His Marie Antoinette was killed in France, and it was one of the most unsettling losses he’d lived through. Especially when later, Napoleon furthered the threat to his royalty, imposing himself on half of Europe with this new attitude which Roderich didn’t like very much at all.
But he still gave him Marie Louise. It was best to keep on good terms, after all. And why not, if it would drill in the fact that his royalty did have that kind of power?
Elizaveta was with him through all of this, all of the turmoil, the joy, and the sorrow. He found himself growing quite fond of her, beyond simply finding her attractive. She respected him, and though he made it a point to remain reserved, he felt that she understood him. She’d even dote on him, occasionally, and he’d have to stop himself from believing she was flirting with him. He’d grown quite used to her cheerfully peeking her head in while he practiced the piano - something that irritated him at first, as it was a distraction. But not anymore. She was a constant.
But the damage had already been done. Revolutions were appearing all over the continent; it seemed everyone followed suit after France. And within the same week, both Italy and Hungary had decided to rebel against him.
Hungary presented Austria with twelve points, all of which seemed rather typical. Except the last.
“Union?” Roderich asked. “Exactly what is that supposed to mean?” He wouldn’t allow himself to think what he wanted it to mean, but he still needed an answer.
“With Transylvania,” she said. Bluntly.
“...What.”
“I said. I want freedom from you, and I want Transylvania back.” Her gaze was stern - calm, for the moment, but unyielding.
Roderich took a deep breath. “I do not wish to hear that from you.”
“Roderich, I’m trying to make a point. My conditions are horrible. You’re refusing to take me seriously.”
“What’s wrong with the way I treat you? God, your title as servant in this house is practically laughable. I appreciate the help you do give, but I don’t ask much. Are you not comfortable here?”
“I’m talking about my people, Roderich. You’re not listening to me. I feel their discontent. I can’t exactly ignore it simply because you’re kind to me personally.” She placed her hands on her hips. “And since you generally are kind to me, I would think that you would be a little more sympathetic to my needs as a nation.”
His palm fell to the surface of his desk, his paperwork forgotten by now. “And just as you cannot ignore the concerns of your people, I cannot ignore the needs of my empire. I cannot afford for you to be doing this. Please try to understand that.”
“Great. Just great. We’re going to be going in circles with this, you know.”
“What do you mean?” He leaned forward, giving her a glare. “Would you lower your voice?”
“I will not lower my voice, thank you very much! My intent is to be heard, and heard well. I demand that you take these points into consideration.”
He got up from his desk, the chair scuttling back from the force of his hand pushing it out of the way. He approached her, his patience wearing thin. “Listen to me. I’ve had enough. You’ve been pestering me for the past several months about your conditions, and I’ve told you that I’ll try my best to make it better. And what do you do? You go and declare that you’re suddenly on your own now. You haven’t even given me any time, Elizaveta.”
“You’ve had plenty of time!” She was truly shouting by now, throwing her arms in the air, challenging him quite literally to his face. She was small in stature compared to him, but she knew how to press a point. “At least to start considering, at least one of my concerns. But no. You’ve addressed none of them whatsoever. None! So, you know, whether you like it or not, I’m making my concerns official.”
“I would strongly advise you to be quiet,” he spat. “I have told you time and again that I cannot afford this, and that is final. I cannot allow you to just leave. If you give me time I will try my best to address your concerns but I cannot simply let you go on your merry way. It doesn’t work that way. And especially not if you expect to join up with him.” He gave her a stern glare; she flinched slightly, and he supposed that she had never seen that kind of cold determination in his eyes before. “You came to this household under certain expectations and I expect you to stick to them.”
She paid no heed to his warning, speaking even more loudly. “What is it with you? Especially these past few years you’ve been... you’ve been clinging to me. What is it? Why? Why do you obsess over me as you do?” She laughed bitterly. “Good lord, if this is about my body, then you could have had that from the very start, but you refused. And it’s caused you to hover over me so I cannot do a single thing without your eye on me. If you wished for me to be nothing other than obedient, you could have done so.”
Roderich’s heart nearly stopped at that remark. Was he that obvious? How could he be obvious to her, when he wouldn’t even admit it to himself?
...But it would all make sense, wouldn’t it? If she was expecting him to take her body from the beginning, it would have given her reason to stay. She even said, just now, that it would have made her obedient.
His eyes widened, drunk on delusion. Oh god; she wanted him.
He walked towards her. “Is that what you want, then.” God, it’s actually happening; he’d dreamed that she’d do this, that she’d just drop everything one day and throw herself at him and beg for him. And he’d indulge her. He’d envelop her and he’d shower her with love. Physically, he was a young man of around seventeen; he was certainly allowed his idealistic fantasies. But he truly believed that this one was coming true, and so he advanced further, cornering her against the wall, giving a small smirk. “...If I had known you’d be so rambunctious because I chose not to have my way with you, I would have.”
“That’s - that’s not what I meant, you idiot!”
“Don’t deny it, darling...”
“Don’t you dare call me darling. Gentleman or not, it seems you’re the same as any other man at the core. You’re no different than Sadik was. Desperate for power over me and doing whatever you can in order to keep it. Just an instinctive creature, wanting nothing more than someplace to stick your-”
“Don’t act as if I don’t respect you. Really, Elizaveta, your first night here I didn’t even think to touch you or anything of the sort until you brought it up. That was all you. I should have taken the hint; if anything I was too respectful. I have you figured out; don’t think that your little hissy fit can let you run away from it. You wanted this from the beginning, and this is some roundabout way of getting it.” He let out a small laugh. “You’re impossible, really, but I can give you what you’re after.” Having her cornered, he began to press himself against her. It was perfect, it was just like he’d imagined, and any moment now she’d stop being coy and plead for him. He moved his lips to her neck, softly breathing on the skin there. “I fully intend to keep you.”
She whimpered at the feel of his breath, only fueling the delusion. “You’ll... you’ll never get to keep me. I am not something you will ever get the pleasure of keeping.”
But he knew, he thought he knew, and he pressed further, being so bold as to let her feel exactly what that whimper had done to him physically. It was taking a lot of courage on his part, really, but he couldn’t back down. She was already showing signs of wanting him, and if he backed out now, it would only be an embarrassment. He wanted this to end well. And so he didn’t mind, especially consumed with lust as he was, that she could probably feel his arousal prominently against her hip. “I didn’t set the precedents, Ungarn,” he breathed. “Your loyalty to me had nothing to do with your body and I was perfectly content to remain that way. If this is how you define loyalty, however, I’m willing to go on your terms...” It was his turn to be coy with her, now. Sensual, even. He didn’t want to simply conquer her. He wanted to win her desire.
“You didn’t listen to a damn word I said! I have no reason to be loyal to you. Not now, not then, not ever.”
“You gave me your loyalty from the beginning! Don’t you see? If you had a problem with being loyal to me, you could have left right when you came here. But you didn’t. You offered yourself to me, and I was an idiot not to take it. You’re just upset, Eliza. It will pass.” His hand wandered from her cheek to her neck, long, wiry, strong fingers just gently ghosting over her breast before resting on her waist, grasping her. He leaned over to whisper softly in her ear. “Stop all this nonsense, all these complaints; we both know what we really want.”
Suddenly, there was a sharp pain on his face, centered on his nose, which was bleeding. She’d struck him. He backed off, mortified. “Eliza...”
“Fuck off. I want nothing to do with you, you perverted sack of shit. You don’t know what I want, and you never will. If you think trying to force me into sex is going to keep me here, then you’re more delusional than I thought!”
Roderich was too shocked to even retaliate. He backed away further, holding his face where she struck him, unfortunately unable to contain the blood with just his hand. “I... I wasn’t forcing anything, I was taking your offer! Make up your goddamn mind!”
“You make up yours! First you act like I’m nothing but a damned servant, and then you turn around and become possessive and do this. What the fuck, Roderich! You act like you don’t care and then you do shit like that. Either admit you do have feelings for me or fuck off. But I am not becoming your obedient little sex doll.”
Why he would have done anything like that if he didn’t have feelings for her was beyond him. He hadn’t gone back on his original intent; he truly did want for it to have meant something. But, hell; she’d given him the opportunity to deny the feelings again, and it allowed him to pretend it never happened. “I see how it is, then,” He retorted. “I should have just done it back then; I was too loose with you. I’ve spoiled you, and you think that just because I didn’t take your little offer means that you’re free to leave. A contract is still a contract, Elizaveta. You are still obligated to remain living here with me. And I’ll back the hell off, if you can possibly manage the presence of mind to quit making these little offers.” Really, it was driving him insane. And she should know better than to tease him like that... unless she simply wanted to take advantage of his kindness to her. And how dare she. “Either give yourself to me or don’t; I don’t care as long as you stay. I would rather either of those than to have a hussy in this household.”
And he was met with another punch. “Until I’m given good reason or there’s a ring on this finger, there will be absolutely no touching of my body. None. At all.” Her voice was trembling. God, he hadn’t wanted to hurt her, that was the last thing...
...Until what?
“...What the hell do you want?? Are you trying to get me to propose to you? You’re not doing a very good job. You honestly expect that this is the way to win my affections, breaking my nose and giving me painfully mixed signals. Is that a suggestion? The ring? Or are you just talking nonsense again? If it’s an honest suggestion then you should have put it on your list of complaints. Otherwise don’t bother. Throwing something like marriage on the table as if it’s some mundane, everyday issue is not making your intentions any clearer. What the hell do you want??” The whites of his eyes were tinged red from holding back his rage.
Elizaveta looked at him flatly. “It was meant to imply that you’re never going to touch me. Not a sincere suggestion of marriage. Disgusting.” She shrugged, turning to leave. “I’d like for you to leave me the hell alone for a few days or so, so I can get my thoughts together and perhaps purge myself of the nastiness of your having touched me. If that’s not too hard for you.”
He panicked, running after her, going to grasp her by the wrist but holding back. “Elizaveta, don’t. I’m begging you. I’ll leave you alone but don’t leave.”
She rolled her eyes back at him in exasperation, stomping her foot as she reluctantly turned to face him again. “This is exactly what I meant. What the hell do you want from me, and why do you want me to stay??”
He raised his hands to his face, helplessly frustrated, raking his fingers through his hair and being sure to avoid contact with his nose. “We’re back at the start, Ungarn... I literally cannot afford to have you gone. I didn’t bring anything else into this until you brought it up. So can we please just forget that? Just - I honestly thought you meant that you wanted -” It was the honest truth. He had no other experience to compare this against, and with the combination of her coy personality and the fact that it all matched up perfectly with his fantasy of feigned resistance, he truly thought that this was how it should be. He didn’t want this. “Just forget it. Forget it happened. The fact remains, as a strictly political issue, that my very existence cannot afford threats to the monarchy. I cannot. Let. You. Leave.”
“I don’t care about your monarchy, I care about the freedom of my people. I’m still my own person, Roderich; I’m not going to suddenly adopt your needs and whims as my own simply because I’m living here. I appreciate you getting me away from Sadik, I truly do, but I see nothing else that obligates me to remain here.” Any gentleness in telling him this was gone as she scoffed at him, shaking her head. “And I am a risk being here, am I not? Corrupting you and such.”
Roderich’s eyes widened angrily, inwardly cowering back into denial. “Don’t flatter yourself. It’s not about corrupting me. It’s that if my subjects are unreliable, it’s an embarrassment. Do you understand?”
She smirked at him. “You see me as nothing other than an object. Lovely, really.”
For a moment, she studied him, though the scowl remained on her face.
“...Would you have actually done it? Would you have had the gall to go through with what you were doing?”
Roderich closed his eyes, quietly spitting his words between deep, focused breaths. “I sincerely thought... that it was what you wanted. Do you see why? You flat out told me I could have. At a time like this when I’m looking for reasons to make you want to stay, for the sake of my own survival, I thought that might have been a reason you were looking for.” His lips contorted, partly trying to control his anger, partly disgusted. “You’re just a tease.”
“You didn’t answer my question. I want to know if you’d have had it in you. Just nothing more than base animal instinct. No love or feeling involved. Would you have been able to do it?”
His eyes were even redder than before, and glassy, wide and looking at her helplessly. “... I would not have so much as started to give in to temptation if there wasn’t...” ...Why the ever-living hell was she asking him this. It was humiliating. “I do not wish to discuss this. If it is not your intent, it is therefore none of your concern.”
Another smirk, this time more amused than anything. With a small snort, she continued speaking. “Right. Love you too. Now, will I be allowed to return to my own home, or are you still wanting to talk to me?”
Roderich’s blood ran cold. Any last efforts to keep his tone focused were lost, and his voice trembled as he whispered frigidly. “...Get out. I refuse to stand here and be mocked. Get. Out.”
She took her cue to leave, storming out the door, blowing a kiss at him in jest.
Not seconds later did Roderich realize how irresponsible it was to have let those words slip from his lips. He’d needed her to stay; that was the whole point. He’d allowed his emotions to get the better of him in such a dire situation, and it disgusted him on top of everything else. Wincing, the pain from her strikes finally setting in after all the chaos, he wondered how on earth she managed to do this to him.
-
...Well this was new.
Austria had had Italy as an underling, but Italy was a child. Clearly needed to be disciplined; the thing was just incorrigible. But Hungary was around his age. And honestly looking... a bit shaken up. He showed her to her room, opening the door for her to allow her in first.
“These are your quarters. This is where you'll be sleeping; it's equipped with a bath and you will have chambermaids to help. I'll be needing you to help the maids and cooks with housework, but you'll still be tended to as well.”
He watched her as she sat on the edge of the bed, smiling awkwardly. “Thank you,” she said, a bit wary. “That shouldn’t be a problem.”
He allowed himself to enter the room to open a window, briefly muttering that it could get a little stuffy. Catching sight of her again, he noticed that she was looking at him rather expectantly. He frowned. “Is there something you needed?”
She hesitated before replying: “...Is that all you needed of me?”
Roderich frowned even further, bewildered. “I can’t think of anything at the moment... I will let you get settled for a few days before I start assigning chores.” His eyes lit up when the thought occurred to him. “Oh - Italy is also living here. If you could help me in looking after her, I’d appreciate it. She is a bit a handful, I’m warning you...”
She still stared, as if that wasn’t the answer she’d expected, or wanted.
“...Am I bothering you?” He finally asked.
She flopped herself back onto the bed, eyeing him. “You’re just going to leave me be?”
He tilted his head just slightly. “Of course, why wouldn’t I...?” He studied her a bit, trying to figure out what exactly...
Oh.
“U-Ungarn, please, you don’t need - please do not feel obligated to provide any other sort of service to me.” He averted his eyes, blushing wildly. There was something about her posture, or complete lack thereof - her body language, lying there on the bed expectantly. Her legs dangling haphazardly, so incongruous to look at when covered completely by that pretty little green dress of hers. It mortified him. “...Frankly, I’d advise against such thoughts. It’s unbecoming.” Really, how dare she; the thought hadn’t crossed his mind at all until she’d suggested it herself. “Now. Is there anything else you need before I leave?”
He heard the rustling of fabric and looked over again to find her sitting up, decent posture restored. “...You’re strange, you know.” But it was said with a smile. Almost grateful.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Elizaveta lowered her eyes, half-smiling. “Sadik... wouldn’t have hesitated to do as he wished. You looked away.” She looked up, blushing slightly, shaking the thought. “It’s just weird, is all.”
Roderich’s confused, almost offended expression fell, turning to one of pity, whether she would have wanted any or not. His eyes were soft, finally understanding, and he stepped closer to stand next to the bed, maintaining a respectful distance but still wanting to reassure. “...Your presence here will not be tied to that sort of thing, I assure you. I would think that doing so would distract from productivity in this household. I am only interested in your help around the house so that things run smoothly and profitably.”
The half-smile from before became genuine. “I think I can manage that, then. As long as I have no worries about being thrown to the jackals.”
He suppressed a smile of his own. “Nothing of the sort. Dinner will be at five; would you like some coffee or tea sent to your room before then?”
Hungary was relieved, he could tell, and it made him a bit proud of himself for being honorable in this situation. “Coffee sounds rather nice right now,” she sighed, reclining on the bed again - normally, this time. “Cream and sugar, please, but only a bit.”
She was quite pretty, he admitted silently.
He could have.
But it wouldn’t have been right. Not to mention he wouldn’t quite know where to start - as much as his empire was strengthened by marriages, it was restricted mostly to his royalty, and he himself wasn’t very experienced at all. Aside from mild experimentation with Spain and a few favors here and there to quell any accusations from his allies of being a tease, he kept mostly to himself. He’d never made love to anyone, and he’d be damned if the first time was out of some sort of obligation. Prudish as he was, he did indeed contemplate these things, and it was firmly decided that it needed to mean something. And god, he barely knew her. Not since childhood, not since she teased and beat him. Not since he’d finally realized she was a girl and taken it upon himself to climb his mountains to bring her the prettiest Edelweiss he could find, only to be met with a blank stare and more teasing.
As much as he didn’t regret his decision to be respectful, he vaguely wondered how it was that now she was the one offering herself, and he was the one refusing.
He’d grown up, was all. He’d learned to be more reserved, and he’d learned that stoicism is best and that it’s not smart to go risking your life simply to pick a flower for a girl.
“Thank you,” she added, breaking his reverie. “Sincerely, thank you.”
And he lost any lingering second thoughts. This was how it should be. “No need to thank me, really. I’ll have your coffee sent up; it should arrive shortly.” He smiled at her before heading out the door, feeling a bit of relief himself. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
“Until dinner, then,” she replied, her voice sweet to his ear.
-
Time passed; Elizaveta had fought for him, fought for his queen. Maria Theresa had been like a mother to him, and she had come and gone faster than Roderich could bear. Haydn had made him laugh, and so had Mozart - oh, Mozart; he and Constanze were just the most beautiful, beautiful stunning couple, he’d muse, and Elizaveta would sometimes wonder just what the fixation was all about. His Marie Antoinette was killed in France, and it was one of the most unsettling losses he’d lived through. Especially when later, Napoleon furthered the threat to his royalty, imposing himself on half of Europe with this new attitude which Roderich didn’t like very much at all.
But he still gave him Marie Louise. It was best to keep on good terms, after all. And why not, if it would drill in the fact that his royalty did have that kind of power?
Elizaveta was with him through all of this, all of the turmoil, the joy, and the sorrow. He found himself growing quite fond of her, beyond simply finding her attractive. She respected him, and though he made it a point to remain reserved, he felt that she understood him. She’d even dote on him, occasionally, and he’d have to stop himself from believing she was flirting with him. He’d grown quite used to her cheerfully peeking her head in while he practiced the piano - something that irritated him at first, as it was a distraction. But not anymore. She was a constant.
But the damage had already been done. Revolutions were appearing all over the continent; it seemed everyone followed suit after France. And within the same week, both Italy and Hungary had decided to rebel against him.
Hungary presented Austria with twelve points, all of which seemed rather typical. Except the last.
“Union?” Roderich asked. “Exactly what is that supposed to mean?” He wouldn’t allow himself to think what he wanted it to mean, but he still needed an answer.
“With Transylvania,” she said. Bluntly.
“...What.”
“I said. I want freedom from you, and I want Transylvania back.” Her gaze was stern - calm, for the moment, but unyielding.
Roderich took a deep breath. “I do not wish to hear that from you.”
“Roderich, I’m trying to make a point. My conditions are horrible. You’re refusing to take me seriously.”
“What’s wrong with the way I treat you? God, your title as servant in this house is practically laughable. I appreciate the help you do give, but I don’t ask much. Are you not comfortable here?”
“I’m talking about my people, Roderich. You’re not listening to me. I feel their discontent. I can’t exactly ignore it simply because you’re kind to me personally.” She placed her hands on her hips. “And since you generally are kind to me, I would think that you would be a little more sympathetic to my needs as a nation.”
His palm fell to the surface of his desk, his paperwork forgotten by now. “And just as you cannot ignore the concerns of your people, I cannot ignore the needs of my empire. I cannot afford for you to be doing this. Please try to understand that.”
“Great. Just great. We’re going to be going in circles with this, you know.”
“What do you mean?” He leaned forward, giving her a glare. “Would you lower your voice?”
“I will not lower my voice, thank you very much! My intent is to be heard, and heard well. I demand that you take these points into consideration.”
He got up from his desk, the chair scuttling back from the force of his hand pushing it out of the way. He approached her, his patience wearing thin. “Listen to me. I’ve had enough. You’ve been pestering me for the past several months about your conditions, and I’ve told you that I’ll try my best to make it better. And what do you do? You go and declare that you’re suddenly on your own now. You haven’t even given me any time, Elizaveta.”
“You’ve had plenty of time!” She was truly shouting by now, throwing her arms in the air, challenging him quite literally to his face. She was small in stature compared to him, but she knew how to press a point. “At least to start considering, at least one of my concerns. But no. You’ve addressed none of them whatsoever. None! So, you know, whether you like it or not, I’m making my concerns official.”
“I would strongly advise you to be quiet,” he spat. “I have told you time and again that I cannot afford this, and that is final. I cannot allow you to just leave. If you give me time I will try my best to address your concerns but I cannot simply let you go on your merry way. It doesn’t work that way. And especially not if you expect to join up with him.” He gave her a stern glare; she flinched slightly, and he supposed that she had never seen that kind of cold determination in his eyes before. “You came to this household under certain expectations and I expect you to stick to them.”
She paid no heed to his warning, speaking even more loudly. “What is it with you? Especially these past few years you’ve been... you’ve been clinging to me. What is it? Why? Why do you obsess over me as you do?” She laughed bitterly. “Good lord, if this is about my body, then you could have had that from the very start, but you refused. And it’s caused you to hover over me so I cannot do a single thing without your eye on me. If you wished for me to be nothing other than obedient, you could have done so.”
Roderich’s heart nearly stopped at that remark. Was he that obvious? How could he be obvious to her, when he wouldn’t even admit it to himself?
...But it would all make sense, wouldn’t it? If she was expecting him to take her body from the beginning, it would have given her reason to stay. She even said, just now, that it would have made her obedient.
His eyes widened, drunk on delusion. Oh god; she wanted him.
He walked towards her. “Is that what you want, then.” God, it’s actually happening; he’d dreamed that she’d do this, that she’d just drop everything one day and throw herself at him and beg for him. And he’d indulge her. He’d envelop her and he’d shower her with love. Physically, he was a young man of around seventeen; he was certainly allowed his idealistic fantasies. But he truly believed that this one was coming true, and so he advanced further, cornering her against the wall, giving a small smirk. “...If I had known you’d be so rambunctious because I chose not to have my way with you, I would have.”
“That’s - that’s not what I meant, you idiot!”
“Don’t deny it, darling...”
“Don’t you dare call me darling. Gentleman or not, it seems you’re the same as any other man at the core. You’re no different than Sadik was. Desperate for power over me and doing whatever you can in order to keep it. Just an instinctive creature, wanting nothing more than someplace to stick your-”
“Don’t act as if I don’t respect you. Really, Elizaveta, your first night here I didn’t even think to touch you or anything of the sort until you brought it up. That was all you. I should have taken the hint; if anything I was too respectful. I have you figured out; don’t think that your little hissy fit can let you run away from it. You wanted this from the beginning, and this is some roundabout way of getting it.” He let out a small laugh. “You’re impossible, really, but I can give you what you’re after.” Having her cornered, he began to press himself against her. It was perfect, it was just like he’d imagined, and any moment now she’d stop being coy and plead for him. He moved his lips to her neck, softly breathing on the skin there. “I fully intend to keep you.”
She whimpered at the feel of his breath, only fueling the delusion. “You’ll... you’ll never get to keep me. I am not something you will ever get the pleasure of keeping.”
But he knew, he thought he knew, and he pressed further, being so bold as to let her feel exactly what that whimper had done to him physically. It was taking a lot of courage on his part, really, but he couldn’t back down. She was already showing signs of wanting him, and if he backed out now, it would only be an embarrassment. He wanted this to end well. And so he didn’t mind, especially consumed with lust as he was, that she could probably feel his arousal prominently against her hip. “I didn’t set the precedents, Ungarn,” he breathed. “Your loyalty to me had nothing to do with your body and I was perfectly content to remain that way. If this is how you define loyalty, however, I’m willing to go on your terms...” It was his turn to be coy with her, now. Sensual, even. He didn’t want to simply conquer her. He wanted to win her desire.
“You didn’t listen to a damn word I said! I have no reason to be loyal to you. Not now, not then, not ever.”
“You gave me your loyalty from the beginning! Don’t you see? If you had a problem with being loyal to me, you could have left right when you came here. But you didn’t. You offered yourself to me, and I was an idiot not to take it. You’re just upset, Eliza. It will pass.” His hand wandered from her cheek to her neck, long, wiry, strong fingers just gently ghosting over her breast before resting on her waist, grasping her. He leaned over to whisper softly in her ear. “Stop all this nonsense, all these complaints; we both know what we really want.”
Suddenly, there was a sharp pain on his face, centered on his nose, which was bleeding. She’d struck him. He backed off, mortified. “Eliza...”
“Fuck off. I want nothing to do with you, you perverted sack of shit. You don’t know what I want, and you never will. If you think trying to force me into sex is going to keep me here, then you’re more delusional than I thought!”
Roderich was too shocked to even retaliate. He backed away further, holding his face where she struck him, unfortunately unable to contain the blood with just his hand. “I... I wasn’t forcing anything, I was taking your offer! Make up your goddamn mind!”
“You make up yours! First you act like I’m nothing but a damned servant, and then you turn around and become possessive and do this. What the fuck, Roderich! You act like you don’t care and then you do shit like that. Either admit you do have feelings for me or fuck off. But I am not becoming your obedient little sex doll.”
Why he would have done anything like that if he didn’t have feelings for her was beyond him. He hadn’t gone back on his original intent; he truly did want for it to have meant something. But, hell; she’d given him the opportunity to deny the feelings again, and it allowed him to pretend it never happened. “I see how it is, then,” He retorted. “I should have just done it back then; I was too loose with you. I’ve spoiled you, and you think that just because I didn’t take your little offer means that you’re free to leave. A contract is still a contract, Elizaveta. You are still obligated to remain living here with me. And I’ll back the hell off, if you can possibly manage the presence of mind to quit making these little offers.” Really, it was driving him insane. And she should know better than to tease him like that... unless she simply wanted to take advantage of his kindness to her. And how dare she. “Either give yourself to me or don’t; I don’t care as long as you stay. I would rather either of those than to have a hussy in this household.”
And he was met with another punch. “Until I’m given good reason or there’s a ring on this finger, there will be absolutely no touching of my body. None. At all.” Her voice was trembling. God, he hadn’t wanted to hurt her, that was the last thing...
...Until what?
“...What the hell do you want?? Are you trying to get me to propose to you? You’re not doing a very good job. You honestly expect that this is the way to win my affections, breaking my nose and giving me painfully mixed signals. Is that a suggestion? The ring? Or are you just talking nonsense again? If it’s an honest suggestion then you should have put it on your list of complaints. Otherwise don’t bother. Throwing something like marriage on the table as if it’s some mundane, everyday issue is not making your intentions any clearer. What the hell do you want??” The whites of his eyes were tinged red from holding back his rage.
Elizaveta looked at him flatly. “It was meant to imply that you’re never going to touch me. Not a sincere suggestion of marriage. Disgusting.” She shrugged, turning to leave. “I’d like for you to leave me the hell alone for a few days or so, so I can get my thoughts together and perhaps purge myself of the nastiness of your having touched me. If that’s not too hard for you.”
He panicked, running after her, going to grasp her by the wrist but holding back. “Elizaveta, don’t. I’m begging you. I’ll leave you alone but don’t leave.”
She rolled her eyes back at him in exasperation, stomping her foot as she reluctantly turned to face him again. “This is exactly what I meant. What the hell do you want from me, and why do you want me to stay??”
He raised his hands to his face, helplessly frustrated, raking his fingers through his hair and being sure to avoid contact with his nose. “We’re back at the start, Ungarn... I literally cannot afford to have you gone. I didn’t bring anything else into this until you brought it up. So can we please just forget that? Just - I honestly thought you meant that you wanted -” It was the honest truth. He had no other experience to compare this against, and with the combination of her coy personality and the fact that it all matched up perfectly with his fantasy of feigned resistance, he truly thought that this was how it should be. He didn’t want this. “Just forget it. Forget it happened. The fact remains, as a strictly political issue, that my very existence cannot afford threats to the monarchy. I cannot. Let. You. Leave.”
“I don’t care about your monarchy, I care about the freedom of my people. I’m still my own person, Roderich; I’m not going to suddenly adopt your needs and whims as my own simply because I’m living here. I appreciate you getting me away from Sadik, I truly do, but I see nothing else that obligates me to remain here.” Any gentleness in telling him this was gone as she scoffed at him, shaking her head. “And I am a risk being here, am I not? Corrupting you and such.”
Roderich’s eyes widened angrily, inwardly cowering back into denial. “Don’t flatter yourself. It’s not about corrupting me. It’s that if my subjects are unreliable, it’s an embarrassment. Do you understand?”
She smirked at him. “You see me as nothing other than an object. Lovely, really.”
For a moment, she studied him, though the scowl remained on her face.
“...Would you have actually done it? Would you have had the gall to go through with what you were doing?”
Roderich closed his eyes, quietly spitting his words between deep, focused breaths. “I sincerely thought... that it was what you wanted. Do you see why? You flat out told me I could have. At a time like this when I’m looking for reasons to make you want to stay, for the sake of my own survival, I thought that might have been a reason you were looking for.” His lips contorted, partly trying to control his anger, partly disgusted. “You’re just a tease.”
“You didn’t answer my question. I want to know if you’d have had it in you. Just nothing more than base animal instinct. No love or feeling involved. Would you have been able to do it?”
His eyes were even redder than before, and glassy, wide and looking at her helplessly. “... I would not have so much as started to give in to temptation if there wasn’t...” ...Why the ever-living hell was she asking him this. It was humiliating. “I do not wish to discuss this. If it is not your intent, it is therefore none of your concern.”
Another smirk, this time more amused than anything. With a small snort, she continued speaking. “Right. Love you too. Now, will I be allowed to return to my own home, or are you still wanting to talk to me?”
Roderich’s blood ran cold. Any last efforts to keep his tone focused were lost, and his voice trembled as he whispered frigidly. “...Get out. I refuse to stand here and be mocked. Get. Out.”
She took her cue to leave, storming out the door, blowing a kiss at him in jest.
Not seconds later did Roderich realize how irresponsible it was to have let those words slip from his lips. He’d needed her to stay; that was the whole point. He’d allowed his emotions to get the better of him in such a dire situation, and it disgusted him on top of everything else. Wincing, the pain from her strikes finally setting in after all the chaos, he wondered how on earth she managed to do this to him.