...
So I stumbled into my room after working a 14 hour day at both jobs, and I find a brand new bed and brand new art desk. Basically, a whole new bedroom.
The bed I knew about, it's my Christmas gift from my sister and mother (got a steal of a deal at Big Lots) and is a Klik-Klak, which is essentially a smaller version of a Futon. The desk is a giant art desk with built-in light table that I fell in LOVE with during my first and only visit to IKEA. It, along with the vase of roses and bottle of Crown Royal, were my Christmas gift from Mark.
Apparently he showed up today and helped assemble everything. And then he showed up at work just before I left to give me a paper heart and tell me he'd be out tonight at his friend's drinking (which I thought odd for him to show up at work when he told them he couldn't come in after they tried to call him him).
I just feel like such a douche. I have nothing, NOTHING this grand for him, especially when you consider he also gave me earlier this week the Bravery's new album as well as this BADASS new Ripper book we saw at the bookstore (which has copies of case documents in it).
I bought him a bar set themed like a mad-lab, and the movie Biodome.. maybe $50. I've no idea what to do, I can't compete with this level of thoughtfulness, and to boot I've been such a jerk to him lately with my mood swings. He really is an amazing guy and while far from perfect, I really don't give him the credit he deserves.
Also I stopped taking my medication over a week ago, and already feel like my old self again. No more crying for no reason on a daily basis. I think it is safe to say those extra hormones were the main (though certainly not only) cause of my shitty mood and outlook for the last little bit. I'm scheduling an appointment to try other options, because I miss feeling like... well... me!