Rant
Okay so this is just a rant that you don't have to read if you don't want to. I don't blame you if you choose not to read it. I just need to get this out there, and maybe I will feel better.
Yeah, so I got home and one of Aaron's (my brother) many trophy's was staring me in the face. It just made me think about all the things that he has accomplished. He get's straight A's without even trying, he's almost a shoe in for West Point Military Acadamy, he's got a girl friend who he cares about very much and returns the feeling, he has gotten nominated for everything I did in ROTC, but he actually ended up winning most of the awards. Then I look at my sisters, they are in band at a young age (7th Grade, started in 4th grade), and they also get A's and B's, and they already have guys chasing them (not that i approve of that, but when i was thier age, guys were calling me unattractive to my face) Then I look at what I have done. I got through high school with average grades, then I go into college and stay for a semester, I haven't been able to save up for classes that I want to take (massage therapy), and I am single, which in itself isn't a bad thing, but I have one guy that likes me, but he has a kid, and I don't know if i'm ready for that. I like him, but i'm not ready to have a kid thrown into a relationship. Then there are like 2 other guys that I like, but one I know doesn't return the feeling, and the other doesn't seem to grasp the fact that can date. everytime I brought up Jon (my ex), he kinda got this suprised look like, "I didn't know you could date people!" I don't know when I look at my family and the things my siblings accomplish I just kinda feel like a failure.
Yeah, so I got home and one of Aaron's (my brother) many trophy's was staring me in the face. It just made me think about all the things that he has accomplished. He get's straight A's without even trying, he's almost a shoe in for West Point Military Acadamy, he's got a girl friend who he cares about very much and returns the feeling, he has gotten nominated for everything I did in ROTC, but he actually ended up winning most of the awards. Then I look at my sisters, they are in band at a young age (7th Grade, started in 4th grade), and they also get A's and B's, and they already have guys chasing them (not that i approve of that, but when i was thier age, guys were calling me unattractive to my face) Then I look at what I have done. I got through high school with average grades, then I go into college and stay for a semester, I haven't been able to save up for classes that I want to take (massage therapy), and I am single, which in itself isn't a bad thing, but I have one guy that likes me, but he has a kid, and I don't know if i'm ready for that. I like him, but i'm not ready to have a kid thrown into a relationship. Then there are like 2 other guys that I like, but one I know doesn't return the feeling, and the other doesn't seem to grasp the fact that can date. everytime I brought up Jon (my ex), he kinda got this suprised look like, "I didn't know you could date people!" I don't know when I look at my family and the things my siblings accomplish I just kinda feel like a failure.