empty cuts
I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling angry, I'm tired of being so stressed, I'mm tired of being in a cage, I'm tired of this flatline that has become my life, I'm tired of fighting, and of hurting (both myself and others), I'm tired of crying, and I'm tired of all of the hate. Some cut themeselves ironically to help ease the pain, but I'm not so sure there would be a point in it for me because I don't even think that blood flows through my veins.
I feel cold hearted, and I feel numb and unhappy. It's like I'm just there...
No good can come from me because I hurt everything that I touch. I feel like wherever I go.. I turn everything grey.
I don't understand how I can hurt so much and so easily hurt another. Why can't I feel anything anymore? If I could just feel some pain right now, I'd at least know that I am okay. But I know that I am not. I'm a very fucked up person and many things have made me this way. If I cannot trust myself, how can I trust anyone else? I'm so lost, and so miserable... But somehow I can smile and I don't know how this is possible... If i sit five minutes I can forget everything and go about like nothing is wrong. Everything is festering inside of me now, and I can feel that something is incredibly wrong, but I dont know what it is, or how to fix it. I know that there is so much wrong, but there is nothing I can do... I don't know what it will take to make me happy... perhaps happieness isnt what I want at all... mabye all i long for is to feel again... I think that most of the tears that I have shed have been empty... and meaningless... mabye just tears to pass the time... I just dont know... I dont know... I'm just hollow and empty... Mabye I just need help
When will the clouds lift? When will my rainbow appear?
I really am the living dead girl.
I feel cold hearted, and I feel numb and unhappy. It's like I'm just there...
No good can come from me because I hurt everything that I touch. I feel like wherever I go.. I turn everything grey.
I don't understand how I can hurt so much and so easily hurt another. Why can't I feel anything anymore? If I could just feel some pain right now, I'd at least know that I am okay. But I know that I am not. I'm a very fucked up person and many things have made me this way. If I cannot trust myself, how can I trust anyone else? I'm so lost, and so miserable... But somehow I can smile and I don't know how this is possible... If i sit five minutes I can forget everything and go about like nothing is wrong. Everything is festering inside of me now, and I can feel that something is incredibly wrong, but I dont know what it is, or how to fix it. I know that there is so much wrong, but there is nothing I can do... I don't know what it will take to make me happy... perhaps happieness isnt what I want at all... mabye all i long for is to feel again... I think that most of the tears that I have shed have been empty... and meaningless... mabye just tears to pass the time... I just dont know... I dont know... I'm just hollow and empty... Mabye I just need help
When will the clouds lift? When will my rainbow appear?
I really am the living dead girl.