Child Molesters
In the latest of my comic MSN Messenger sexcapades: I was talking to this 28-year-old Pakistani chap called Aamir to whom I'd given my e-mail address on one of those frienship sites called Friendster. The exchange of e-mail addresses was just for chatting purposes.
So anyways, today morning he signed on and asked me:
Crazy: can we be special friends
• Danu •: what do you mean?
Crazy: mean friends for happiness, sadness, past, future and the natural desires.....
• Danu •: natural desires? :S
Crazy: sex of course
• Danu •: why do you want to have sex with boys?
Crazy: I dont know, but I start thinking when I was 10-11 yrs
Crazy: I am very hardly attacked to girls.
Thank God he hasn't attacked girls! Girls, please be on the look out for any puny 11-year-old Pakistani rapist and/or molester. YOUR DIGNITY [AND HYMEN] COULD BE IN GRAVE DANGER.
Ok ok, I know he meant 'attracted'.. just having a little fun of my own.
• Danu •: you like sucking cock?
Crazy: sure but clean and good smell
This deserves a roll on the floor with laughter. I'm just trying to imagine how he would've said that in Urdu. "Saaf aur khushboo waala".
Then he proceeded to ask me out to a threesome happening "8pm to 11pm" tonight. His "friend from filipines 26yrs, Both (top/bottom)" is also participating.
I played along and asked him for all the details he could give me. I asked him exactly where the threesome was gonna happen.. I told him I needed the exact location in case of emergency.
Aamir: can you please tell me what kind of emergency you are thnking, because i have to call again to my friend for the villa no. (believe me) i am doing all because of this and for myself
• Danu •: what emergency i'm thinking?
Aamir: like you will be rapped, or you will be looted what else ?
Rapped! Yes, because I'm going to Eminem's house for the threesome, no? The poor bastard said "(believe me)" a lot.. with the brackets every time.
However, my real plan was to get all the information from him and then tell him that I would report his illegal activities to the police, just to scare the hell out of him. But no such thing happened, sadly.
Their threesome must've ended by now. It's almost tomorrow.
In other news, I went to Sharjah with Abeer today. Abeer wanted to buy a textbook for the single O-level subject she's doing, Development Studies. We didn't find the textbook in any of the bookshops there [there aren't any good bookshops that sell school textbooks in Dubai.. or at least, I don't know of any]. But we did meet Maisam, Abeer's friend and so-called brother. She calls him 'bhayya' [big bro] and he calls her 'aapi' [big sis]. It's irritating to watch maturing people do that among themselves.
Anyways, Maisam.. ah.. the coolness returned to my eyes. He's drop-dead gorgeous. My height, maybe an inch or two taller. A year younger than me, but has a build to die for. And now the cute bastard has colored his goatee a tantalizing rust color, with henna I presume. I kept smelling his deodorant because I was walking either right behind him or in front of him. I couldn't quite put my finger on the brand of deo, but it was exciting. "Oh, I'm just smelling the air, but you arms are in the way."
He's unfortunately straight and has a girlfriend who's joining my school this year. Ah well, a fag can dream, can't he?
"Mi dofek ba-delet, betach ba.."
"Whoever knocks on the door, definitely comes.."
-- Achinoam Nini and Meir Banai in their song, Aval Ahavah [But Love].
So anyways, today morning he signed on and asked me:
Crazy: can we be special friends
• Danu •: what do you mean?
Crazy: mean friends for happiness, sadness, past, future and the natural desires.....
• Danu •: natural desires? :S
Crazy: sex of course
• Danu •: why do you want to have sex with boys?
Crazy: I dont know, but I start thinking when I was 10-11 yrs
Crazy: I am very hardly attacked to girls.
Thank God he hasn't attacked girls! Girls, please be on the look out for any puny 11-year-old Pakistani rapist and/or molester. YOUR DIGNITY [AND HYMEN] COULD BE IN GRAVE DANGER.
Ok ok, I know he meant 'attracted'.. just having a little fun of my own.
• Danu •: you like sucking cock?
Crazy: sure but clean and good smell
This deserves a roll on the floor with laughter. I'm just trying to imagine how he would've said that in Urdu. "Saaf aur khushboo waala".
Then he proceeded to ask me out to a threesome happening "8pm to 11pm" tonight. His "friend from filipines 26yrs, Both (top/bottom)" is also participating.
I played along and asked him for all the details he could give me. I asked him exactly where the threesome was gonna happen.. I told him I needed the exact location in case of emergency.
Aamir: can you please tell me what kind of emergency you are thnking, because i have to call again to my friend for the villa no. (believe me) i am doing all because of this and for myself
• Danu •: what emergency i'm thinking?
Aamir: like you will be rapped, or you will be looted what else ?
Rapped! Yes, because I'm going to Eminem's house for the threesome, no? The poor bastard said "(believe me)" a lot.. with the brackets every time.
However, my real plan was to get all the information from him and then tell him that I would report his illegal activities to the police, just to scare the hell out of him. But no such thing happened, sadly.
Their threesome must've ended by now. It's almost tomorrow.
In other news, I went to Sharjah with Abeer today. Abeer wanted to buy a textbook for the single O-level subject she's doing, Development Studies. We didn't find the textbook in any of the bookshops there [there aren't any good bookshops that sell school textbooks in Dubai.. or at least, I don't know of any]. But we did meet Maisam, Abeer's friend and so-called brother. She calls him 'bhayya' [big bro] and he calls her 'aapi' [big sis]. It's irritating to watch maturing people do that among themselves.
Anyways, Maisam.. ah.. the coolness returned to my eyes. He's drop-dead gorgeous. My height, maybe an inch or two taller. A year younger than me, but has a build to die for. And now the cute bastard has colored his goatee a tantalizing rust color, with henna I presume. I kept smelling his deodorant because I was walking either right behind him or in front of him. I couldn't quite put my finger on the brand of deo, but it was exciting. "Oh, I'm just smelling the air, but you arms are in the way."
He's unfortunately straight and has a girlfriend who's joining my school this year. Ah well, a fag can dream, can't he?
"Mi dofek ba-delet, betach ba.."
"Whoever knocks on the door, definitely comes.."
-- Achinoam Nini and Meir Banai in their song, Aval Ahavah [But Love].