(no subject)
Well. we talked, actually i talked and he listened. I got to say what i needed to say, the ball is in his court. I know what i want but i will not force him into something he does not want. yes, i pray that he takes me back, i pray that this is not the end. we hung out, i fucked up and we had sex but i will not kiss him or anything unless he wants me to. Whatever happens is their plan for me, i just hope that their plan and my wish coinside.
No matter what happens i will not be loosing my best friend and that keeps my spirit way up.
I believe in signs. I went down on my knees last monday and basically said "i fucked up, i know that, and i know you will help me. I have no clue what i am supposed to do. Please, give me a sign, and if i miss it please just keep smacking me in the face (i have a tendancy to make a sign out of nothing so i have grown accustom to ignoring them)". All week i was missing signs and other people picked them out. Then i kept my eyes are heart open. All the signs pointed to adam. (lisense plate ioulove, asking for note "have at em (say it fast and see what it sound like), then thursday night. I am not giving up hope ever, but i will not push.
Apparently Jessica talked to Adam and he teared up.
Please, dont let this be the end, please let this be part of your plan for me. Everything happens for a reason, please let the reason for this be me learning that i need to get help, that i am stronger than i thought, and finally not feeling like a victim, feeling confident in myself.
No matter what happens i will not be loosing my best friend and that keeps my spirit way up.
I believe in signs. I went down on my knees last monday and basically said "i fucked up, i know that, and i know you will help me. I have no clue what i am supposed to do. Please, give me a sign, and if i miss it please just keep smacking me in the face (i have a tendancy to make a sign out of nothing so i have grown accustom to ignoring them)". All week i was missing signs and other people picked them out. Then i kept my eyes are heart open. All the signs pointed to adam. (lisense plate ioulove, asking for note "have at em (say it fast and see what it sound like), then thursday night. I am not giving up hope ever, but i will not push.
Apparently Jessica talked to Adam and he teared up.
Please, dont let this be the end, please let this be part of your plan for me. Everything happens for a reason, please let the reason for this be me learning that i need to get help, that i am stronger than i thought, and finally not feeling like a victim, feeling confident in myself.