Potential (1/1)
Title: Potential (1/1)
Author: WibbleyWobbley
Characters: Justin, Nora
Rating: G
Summary: Justin worries about his future while waiting for the results of a test.
Spoilers: Episodes related to Justin's season 4 storyline, particularly The Science Fair
Word Count: ~880
Disclaimer: Still not mine
Prompt: Justin/February challenge. #2: "A sobering thought: what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential?" - Jane Wagner
Nora shifted the bags of groceries in her arms, then carefully reached out and pulled the door open. She walked into the kitchen, hurrying over to place the newly-purchased food on the counter before she dropped everything.
“Hi Mom,” came an unexpected voice.
“Oh!” Nora looked up in surprise. Then she rolled her eyes. “You didn’t see me carrying all this? Come on - help me put this stuff away.”
Justin sighed, putting the sheet of paper he was reading down on the counter and dragging himself off his stool. He took a few steps closer to Nora, reaching out for the nearest bag.
“What are you doing here?” Nora asked as she put her purse on the counter.
“I needed a quiet place to study. Rebecca was distracting me - not on purpose. I just…needed to study.”
“You can come over here whenever you need to. What are you doing in class now?”
“Endocrine system. But, uh, I haven’t got much done here either. I’ve been doing some research on something else.”
Nora looked up, curious at the slightly hesitant tone in Justin’s voice.
“What’s that?”
Justin paused, then stretched across the counter and picked up his paper again. He cleared his throat before reading aloud. “‘Sensory Processing Dysfunction includes three primary diagnoses. Type III, known as Sensory Discrimination Disorder, involves incorrect processing of visual or auditory input. This may be seen in inattentiveness, disorganization and poor school performance. Other disorders associated with SPD include learning disabilities, attention deficit disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder’ - so, you know, the war probably didn’t help - ‘SPD is also associated with impaired self-esteem, and 73% of affected individuals are male.’”
Nora nodded slowly as she watched Justin. Justin, however, refused to look up at her. Nora walked around the counter and placed one hand on Justin’s back.
“And when is that test?”
“Friday.”
***
That Friday, Nora wasn’t at all surprised to see Justin’s Jeep in the driveway again. She eventually found him in the back, sitting by the pool. His pants were rolled up as he dangled his feet in the water. She walked up to him, slipping her shoes off as she sat down and slid her own legs into the pool.
“How’d it go?”
Justin cleared his throat. Without looking over at her, he began to talk. “They did a bunch of tests. You know, logic problems and story problems… Threw a bunch of different input at my senses,” he added somewhat self-deprecatingly.
“And?”
Justin sighed. “The doctor is going to review my results over the weekend and call me on Monday.”
Nora nodded slowly. “Waiting is always the worst part. But…this could be the change you need to continue on successfully.”
Justin scoffed. “Yeah. I’ll be top of my class in no time at all.”
“Justin.”
“Associated with poor self-esteem, remember?”
“Doesn’t mean I want to hear it.”
Justin laughed. He finally looked over at Nora, giving her a small smile.
“I feel so…guilty,” Nora continued quietly.
“Why?”
Nora groaned, looking up at the sky as she blinked back tears. “I’m your mother. I should have noticed years ago that there was something wrong. I even wonder if part of the reason you started using was because you felt…I don’t know, stupid or something. If I had just had you tested when you were little, your whole life might have been different.”
“Mom, I’m sure they didn’t even know about some of this stuff when I was younger. We can’t go back and play what-ifs now. The fact is that I’m an addict, and I’m a vet, and both of those things are going to color how I see the world now. Maybe with this, I can learn how to use it to my advantage, you know? That’s what I’m hoping for, anyway - that all of this is so I can do something good despite all the mistakes I made.”
Justin’s voice broke as he looked away.
“What’s wrong?” Nora asked.
Justin laughed humorlessly. “I’m more scared that they’ll come back and say that there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m banking on this, Mom. I need this to be the explanation. Because if it’s not, that means I’ve just hit a wall. I’m never going to be better than this. I’m never going to be smarter. Being a college drop-out, recovering addict, jobless loser is all I’m capable of.”
Nora stared at him for a second. “Associated with poor self-esteem, remember?” she said firmly.
Justin took a shuddering breath, staring down at his lap. Nora leaned into him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
“If they say that this isn’t the explanation, then we help you find a new path. There are plenty of things you can do that don’t require medical school. This world puts so much power and importance into degrees and education that people who don’t operate that way are made to feel…less. You have so many skills, my sweet boy. I wish you could see that. You are so kind and so loving and so brave. I can’t wait to see what you become.”
Justin looked up at Nora, smiling sadly. He quickly kissed her cheek. “Thanks, Mom.”
Nora patted his thigh, then pulled her feet out of the water. “Come on,” she said as she stood. “Ice cream.”
The End
A/N2: I did some quick research on various Web sites, so I hope I'm describing the condition accurately! Any misrepresentation is not intended as an offense!
Author: WibbleyWobbley
Characters: Justin, Nora
Rating: G
Summary: Justin worries about his future while waiting for the results of a test.
Spoilers: Episodes related to Justin's season 4 storyline, particularly The Science Fair
Word Count: ~880
Disclaimer: Still not mine
Prompt: Justin/February challenge. #2: "A sobering thought: what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential?" - Jane Wagner
Nora shifted the bags of groceries in her arms, then carefully reached out and pulled the door open. She walked into the kitchen, hurrying over to place the newly-purchased food on the counter before she dropped everything.
“Hi Mom,” came an unexpected voice.
“Oh!” Nora looked up in surprise. Then she rolled her eyes. “You didn’t see me carrying all this? Come on - help me put this stuff away.”
Justin sighed, putting the sheet of paper he was reading down on the counter and dragging himself off his stool. He took a few steps closer to Nora, reaching out for the nearest bag.
“What are you doing here?” Nora asked as she put her purse on the counter.
“I needed a quiet place to study. Rebecca was distracting me - not on purpose. I just…needed to study.”
“You can come over here whenever you need to. What are you doing in class now?”
“Endocrine system. But, uh, I haven’t got much done here either. I’ve been doing some research on something else.”
Nora looked up, curious at the slightly hesitant tone in Justin’s voice.
“What’s that?”
Justin paused, then stretched across the counter and picked up his paper again. He cleared his throat before reading aloud. “‘Sensory Processing Dysfunction includes three primary diagnoses. Type III, known as Sensory Discrimination Disorder, involves incorrect processing of visual or auditory input. This may be seen in inattentiveness, disorganization and poor school performance. Other disorders associated with SPD include learning disabilities, attention deficit disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder’ - so, you know, the war probably didn’t help - ‘SPD is also associated with impaired self-esteem, and 73% of affected individuals are male.’”
Nora nodded slowly as she watched Justin. Justin, however, refused to look up at her. Nora walked around the counter and placed one hand on Justin’s back.
“And when is that test?”
“Friday.”
***
That Friday, Nora wasn’t at all surprised to see Justin’s Jeep in the driveway again. She eventually found him in the back, sitting by the pool. His pants were rolled up as he dangled his feet in the water. She walked up to him, slipping her shoes off as she sat down and slid her own legs into the pool.
“How’d it go?”
Justin cleared his throat. Without looking over at her, he began to talk. “They did a bunch of tests. You know, logic problems and story problems… Threw a bunch of different input at my senses,” he added somewhat self-deprecatingly.
“And?”
Justin sighed. “The doctor is going to review my results over the weekend and call me on Monday.”
Nora nodded slowly. “Waiting is always the worst part. But…this could be the change you need to continue on successfully.”
Justin scoffed. “Yeah. I’ll be top of my class in no time at all.”
“Justin.”
“Associated with poor self-esteem, remember?”
“Doesn’t mean I want to hear it.”
Justin laughed. He finally looked over at Nora, giving her a small smile.
“I feel so…guilty,” Nora continued quietly.
“Why?”
Nora groaned, looking up at the sky as she blinked back tears. “I’m your mother. I should have noticed years ago that there was something wrong. I even wonder if part of the reason you started using was because you felt…I don’t know, stupid or something. If I had just had you tested when you were little, your whole life might have been different.”
“Mom, I’m sure they didn’t even know about some of this stuff when I was younger. We can’t go back and play what-ifs now. The fact is that I’m an addict, and I’m a vet, and both of those things are going to color how I see the world now. Maybe with this, I can learn how to use it to my advantage, you know? That’s what I’m hoping for, anyway - that all of this is so I can do something good despite all the mistakes I made.”
Justin’s voice broke as he looked away.
“What’s wrong?” Nora asked.
Justin laughed humorlessly. “I’m more scared that they’ll come back and say that there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m banking on this, Mom. I need this to be the explanation. Because if it’s not, that means I’ve just hit a wall. I’m never going to be better than this. I’m never going to be smarter. Being a college drop-out, recovering addict, jobless loser is all I’m capable of.”
Nora stared at him for a second. “Associated with poor self-esteem, remember?” she said firmly.
Justin took a shuddering breath, staring down at his lap. Nora leaned into him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
“If they say that this isn’t the explanation, then we help you find a new path. There are plenty of things you can do that don’t require medical school. This world puts so much power and importance into degrees and education that people who don’t operate that way are made to feel…less. You have so many skills, my sweet boy. I wish you could see that. You are so kind and so loving and so brave. I can’t wait to see what you become.”
Justin looked up at Nora, smiling sadly. He quickly kissed her cheek. “Thanks, Mom.”
Nora patted his thigh, then pulled her feet out of the water. “Come on,” she said as she stood. “Ice cream.”
The End
A/N2: I did some quick research on various Web sites, so I hope I'm describing the condition accurately! Any misrepresentation is not intended as an offense!