Character Application - The Wake RP
Personal Information
Name: Dragon
Age: 35
Personal LJ: dragondancer515
Email / AIM / MSN: dragondancer5150@yahoo.com (both email and AIM [yes the whole thing])
Character Information
Character Name: Captain Carmine Fanzone
Fandom: Transformers Animated
Source: http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Captain_Fanzone
Character History: Fanzone is the captain of the Detroit Metro Police Dept. He’s in his early to mid-50’s and married, though he has no children. His life was fairly normal, his job routine, until the day he was leading a SWAT team against a biotech nano-monster . . . and several of the on-hand emergency vehicles, including his own car (he initially thought), turned out to be transforming robots in disguise. Thus he was introduced to the Autobots. After that, his life got weird.
He’s been held hostage by a transforming harrier jet, chosen machines over bio-enhanced humans for his police force (at least they have an off-switch when they malfunction and go berserk), and faced off with mechanical dinosaurs. He developed respect and trust for the Autobot named Prowl when the two were forced to work together after Prometheus Black, apparently now calling himself “Meltdown,” had the so-called “Dinobots” kidnap Sari Sumdac. Fanzone even went so far as to say that Prowl wasn’t bad “for a robot” and to recognize that the two of them had made a pretty good team.
That new trust, however, was severely strained with Megatron’s comeback and the resulting battle that destroyed a good half of the city . . . and the arrival of the arrogant and organophobic Elite Guard didn’t help anything. Fanzone was anything but impressed especially by the condescending, self-important Sentinel Prime. The new robot’s continued harassment of Optimus Prime didn’t escape his notice either, whatever he himself thought of the mech. Of course, he held no more love for a certain usurper CEO, one Porter C. Powell, when the shrewd and unprincipled businessman got his employee Henry Masterson released of charges by pointing out, among other things, that robots had no rights, thereby nullifying the wrongs done to Sentinel and (more importantly in Fanzone’s book) Optimus.
Things got more personally uncomfortable when Optimus’s crew, after being ordered to prepare to leave, went to Fanzone about taking in Sari Sumdac. Her father, Professor Isaac Sumdac, had been missing since Megatron’s rise and subsequent disappearance, and she had been made homeless by Powell’s take-over of her father’s company, Sumdac Systems. It would have been the right thing to do - the girl did need a legal guardian despite having no legal proof of her existence, and the police captain hadn’t pursued the matter since the Autobots were taking care of her and he had other things to focus on - but he made no pretense of disappointment at being released from that obligation when Ultra Magnus changed his decree and allowed Optimus and crew to remain on Earth.
With the Elite Guard’s departure, life returned to as close to normal as it got since the Autobots had revealed themselves initially. Fanzone was on-hand to break up an argument between an elderly, argumentative citizen and an elderly, argumentative medi-bot, suggesting that Ratchet work on his people skills. Coming from Fanzone, that says quite a lot. Later, he wound up working with Bumblebee and Sari to take down Master Disaster, which included an altercation with Blitzwing . . . and a lesson in breaking the rules for both of his immature partners. Fanzone later got to turn the tables on Powell in a reversal of the Headmaster incident when he refused to arrest Optimus Prime for employing some harmless strong-arm tactics and… borrowing a device from Powell, which was returned if not in the same good shape it was procured.
Fanzone was underwhelmed by two “friends” of Bulkhead’s, telling the wrecker-bot to let his “Constructicon” buddies know that Fanzone didn’t appreciate illegal horseplay from anyone, especially machines. He was equally underwhelmed by the Soundwave toy he was given for Christmas . . . until it activated and mind controlled him - then he wasn’t aware of anything.
Perhaps Fanzone’s greatest adventure - or greatest headache, as he’d tell it - was the time he found himself transported to another world. He’d gone to Sumdac Tower trying to get help with some malfunctioning police drones, but Ratchet was busy struggling to understand Bulkhead’s clumsy handwritten instruction for operating the space bridge that had been built on the roof, so Fanzone’s pleas for aid fell on deaf ears. Never mind that the drones were firing at him with lethal prejudice. Ratchet did something wrong - or right, depending on how one looked at it - and accidentally activated the space bridge, which promptly sucked up Fanzone away from the attacking drones . . . and dumped him on Cybertron. If Fanzone had ever stopped to think about what his own personal hell would look like, this would pretty much have been it.
Fanzone found himself alone in a world made up entirely of oversized machines. Organophobic machines, no less. Thankfully, he wasn’t alone for long - Ratchet had followed him. The cranky old medi-bot saved him from getting stomped on like a cockroach, then decided to take a leisurely tour of the city before bothering to try to get them both home. Well . . . to be fair, Fanzone couldn’t have faulted him that too much. This crazy, mechanized place was Ratchet’s home, after all. Had Fanzone been stuck on Cybertron for years, he’d have been pretty damned happy to see Detroit again. Hell, he was going to be pretty damned happy to see Detroit again as it was. Still, it was good to see the old medi-bot genuinely happy and at peace for the first time since Fanzone had met him (even if it was short-lived).
Things went from what was really only “annoying” bad to “serious” bad in a hurry, however, when the two discovered the current climate of paranoia that Sentinel Prime had instigated, with propaganda that reminded Fanzone all too uncomfortably of The Red Scare from his own country’s Cold War era. Then the arrogant, full-of-himself machine himself showed up, trying to arrest Ratchet for several violations of his so-called security measures and Fanzone basically for existing. Neither of them took too well to that, but they went along with things for the moment when Omega Supreme showed up without warning, floating overhead.
The two accompanied Sentinel Prime as he appeared before the Autobot Council demanding sanction to fire on the enormous and apparently comatose robot. Fanzone listened in silence to the heated argument between Sentinel and Ratchet, and wondered how in the hell such a paranoid loose cannon had risen to the rank he had. Things turned ugly when Sentinel once more called for Ratchet’s arrest, this time for subversion and treason. Ratchet, Fanzone realized, was not only trying to avert widespread destruction, he was trying to save the life of a friend. Fanzone was not about to stand by and allow the arrest of the only one in the room who seemed to have any real integrity and his head on straight - not to mention Fanzone’s ticket home. Faking a violent sneeze that caused the two advancing soldiers to pause for fear of organic contamination, Fanzone bought Ratchet the precious seconds he needed to escape, taking Fanzone with him.
Ratchet thanked Fanzone for his help, recognizing that he’d not needed to involve himself. In response, Fanzone just expressed his opinion of Sentinel, his way of saying he’d been glad to do it. They had escaped down into some old, forgotten service tunnels below the city, and Fanzone listened sympathetically as Ratchet shared just a little history with him. They discovered, however, that these tunnels and the research facility they led to weren’t as abandoned as Ratchet had believed. In fact, they had found the hideout of the much-sought-for traitor, who turned out to be none other than the Decepticon Shockwave. A brief fight ensued. Fanzone didn’t get half of what they were talking about - activation codes what? - but he saw the effect that threatening to “go to the source” had on Ratchet. Fanzone watched in horror as Ratchet was thrown over the ledge into what looked to him like a bottomless pit while the infiltrator escaped, and was relieved when Ratchet managed to rescue himself, lifting himself back to the bridge on his magnetic powers. “I’m getting too old for this,” Ratchet bemoaned. Fanzone could relate.
Fanzone put his years of experience in police work to use and proved invaluable to Ratchet when he helped locate a small-time crook who could get them a forged security clearance into the Autobots’ high-security medical facility, and then played “bad cop” to Ratchet’s “good cop” to get the guy to cooperate, capitalizing on his being an organic. Merely threatening to spit on the shady robot was enough to make him cave . . . though not enough to make him give them a working security card.
The timely approach of Sentinel’s right-hand man solved the problem. Ratchet reacted defensively to his appearance, but Fanzone had known about him tailing them pretty much since they’d first entered the tunnels and assured the medi-bot that if he’d meant to arrest them, he’d have done it long before then. Instead, the other mech turned out to be a secret ally, giving them a working access card before backing off again, presumably to return “empty-handed” to Sentinel. Ratchet and Fanzone entered the facility, and the medic went straight for the “robot dame in a room.” Fanzone was less than impressed with Ratchet’s “explanation” of everything going on. Shockwave’s arrival pre-empted any further explanation until Fanzone threatened to jump off the fem-bot’s gurney, saying he wasn’t going any further until he started getting some real answers. Ratchet’s hurried reply made about as much sense to Fanzone as anything else so far, but Shockwave’s pursuit kept them from going into any more detail. Ratchet hid Fanzone and the unconscious “intel-bot” in a room while he tried to face Shockwave. From the explosive noises of combat, Fanzone could only guess it wasn’t going too well. And then the room he was in erupted in chaos as something was smashed through the wall. By the time Fanzone pulled himself from the rubble, Sentinel had arrived (late) to the party, Ratchet had the oversized sledgehammer Shockwave had been carrying, and Shockwave had escaped with the dame.
Fanzone listened in satisfaction as the council head gave that incompetent Sentinel what-for, though for himself, he was just more than ready to head home. Ratchet was ready to go back too, but at last minute, it was more like making a break for it when the medi-bot refused to give up the hammer first. Not that Fanzone would have wanted the pompous “acting magnus” to have it either. The pair arrived safely back on the roof of Sumdac Tower only to be followed by the mech that had helped them down in the tunnels, Jazz. Ratchet reiterated his refusal to give up the weapon to the Elite Guard, but Jazz apparently had jumped ship, himself fed up with Sentinel and saying that his instinct told him he needed to be here anyway. That was, if they’d have him. Fanzone, to be fair, recognized the guy’s usefulness and that he wasn’t bad . . . for a machine. Still, all he could bring himself to say was a groan of “all we need…another robot.”
A few weeks later, Fanzone spotted Optimus Prime . . . flying. Not all that well, really - though he managed to keep the collateral damage to a minimum - but still, Fanzone felt it could only be an omen for things to come. And he was right - very shortly after this, three new robots the size of Omega Surpreme showed up, going straight for Sumdac Tower. There was nothing Fanzone could do as he witnessed what looked like Prime and Prowl take them on alone. Ratchet’s new hammer, which Prime was now carrying, had a nifty power to it, though - Prime created a hurricane that caught and flung the three massive machines clear out over Lake Erie. Unfortunately, two of them managed to come back. At some point, the faces in their headplates changed, though Fanzone didn’t know what to make of that. What he did get was that the robots were now enormous walking bombs that were set to wipe Detroit off the map in an attempt to be rid of Megatron and the Autobots for good. Fanzone watched, helpless, as Prime defeated and disarmed one of the robots only for a force field of some kind to trap both him and Megatron with the other. Fanzone could only hope the mysterious force field would contain the blast, but he feared for Prime’s life . . . until some force, like a hand made of energy, seemed to pull him safely free. The force field did indeed contain the blast, but Megatron too somehow survived, if much the worse for wear. Fanzone witnessed the final fight between Optimus Prime and Megatron, defeating the Decepticon leader once and for all, and refusing to kill him. Instead, in a move that made the police captain almost proud of him, Prime clapped cuffs on Megatron and, finally, the Autobots were able to return to their own home of Cybertron.
Fanzone would never admit to missing the alien machines, but life’s just not been the same without them.
Character Personality: Fanzone’s a “been there, done that” kind of guy with a dry, sarcastic sense of humor and a deadpan delivery. He’s not completely unfazable, but it takes a lot to surprise - let alone unnerve - him. Especially since giant, alien robots have invaded his hometown of Detroit. Now, even their massive altercations do little more than piss him off when they destroy half his city in the process. He’s the rock in the storm when the shit hits the fan and chaos breaks out - he’ll take charge and start barking orders to get the situation under control. He’s not afraid to include the Autobots in that, either, if Optimus Prime hasn’t already gotten his own men moving.
He’s a good guy, if old-fashioned. He’s one of those who’d rather use paper and pen than fart around with a computer, and he only has a cell phone because his line of work requires him to have one. He doesn’t really outright “hate” technology - not like, say, Prometheus Black (Meltdown). It’s more of an “I’m old” sort of thing. The old dog who doesn’t do new tricks. That, and the fact that technology seems have no love for him either, or maybe it does but more like “loves to play practical jokes” sort of thing. Still, it doesn’t keep him from using technology if it’s the best means to the necessary end.
Again, Fanzone’s a good man and a good cop. He works to protect his city and its citizens, be that from two-bit human crooks or from Megatron himself. If he can’t handle something, he’s not too proud to find someone who can. Whatever will get the job done. Despite his age (and girth), he’s got quick reflexes, able to tackle someone out of the way of harm. And he’ll not hesitate to act, to protect people and to stand against those threatening innocents or otherwise disturbing the peace.
Regarding the Autobots, he’s got mixed feelings. He’s been to Cybertron. The experience is one he’d not want to repeat even if he didn’t “hate” giant robots and other machines. Sentinel Prime is a pompous and incompetent jerk, and he’s not so sure about that Ultra Magnus guy, either. Optimus Prime and his crew, however, are another story. While on the surface, he still gives them all kinds of guff for continually (if inadvertently) trashing his city, he’s watched them in action, even worked alongside them, enough times that they have most definitely earned his respect. He’s the closest - if it can be considered “close” - to Ratchet, though that’s a more recent development stemming from their time together on Cybertron. Both of them are up in years and have been around the block enough times that they’ve seen and done just about everything. Both are old dogs trying to keep up with the young pups without looking like they’re “trying” to keep up, while at the same time doing their damnest to keep the young and stupid ones from getting killed in the line of duty. Both are gruff and crabby on the outside, as much as anything to protect the true heart within that really does care about the people around them. Fanzone’s found something of a kindred spirit in the old medic . . . not that he’d ever admit aloud to such a ridiculous attachment to a “machine.” He’s got a reputation to uphold, after all.
Powers: No powers to speak of. In that respect, he’s a normal human. He’s a well-trained cop, able to spot a tail - and pretend he hasn’t - or find the kind of criminal he wants in probably literally any city if he needs information. He’s got really good reflexes and is trained in all kinds of firearms, able to handle anything from a handgun to a bazooka.
Actually . . . I take that back. He has one…power…if it can be called that. More of a knack, or an anti-knack. He and Murphy’s Law butt heads when it comes to technology of any kind. He has the phenomenally poor luck of things just not working right. When it’s critical, he doesn’t have too much of a problem - even a “percussive” solution might actually work (like putting his fist through a control panel to get a swiveling walkway to operate) - but more casually, he’s likely to experience just about any little malfunction possible. He won’t be able to switch to a second call on his phone, or the phone will hang up a call to a pitched squeal in his ear. A condiments-dispenser ‘bot will refuse to give him mayo, wind up dumping ketchup instead, then shower him in napkins. Most of his mishaps are mere irritants, nothing harmful . . . but they’re enough - and frequent enough - for him to have developed his well-known mantra, “This is why I hate machines!”
Samples
First person:
-eck is this? My phone’s got some kinda video conferencing on it or something now? …great. Just how long was I out?
Good afternoon. My name’s Captain Fanzone with the Detroit Police. If anyone gets this, I need to talk to this city’s mayor. Or Chief of Police. Or something. I don’t-?! …the heck?
[has spotted something off-camera, recording is forgotten for a moment]
Great. They got giant robots here too, huh? I musta got caught in one of those “space bridge” contraptions an didn’t know it. Guess one’a those Autobots must have been testin’ some new bridge thing an’ failed ta report it first. Just tell me I didn’t get slingshot all the way to Cybertron again. For that matter, whatever idiot sent me here better find me an’ pull me back pronto!
Oh, for the love of-! Is this thing still recording? All right . . . how do I turn it off?
[presses buttons until it zaps him with a jolt of electricity - he drops the phone]
Ah! It bit me. The blasted thing bit me! This is why I hate machines! Argh!
Third Person:
Fanzone wasn’t looking forward to his meeting with Mayor Edsel, and he sure as hell wasn’t doing it on an empty stomach. He didn’t have a whole lot of time, though, so he decided to brave the drive-through at Burger Bot.
“Welcome to Burger Bot. May I take your order?” came the scratchy, synthesized voice of the robotic service center attached to the side of the fast-food restaurant.
“Ah, yeah . . . I’ll have a Mega-Meaty cheeseburger, onion rings, and a large coke.”
“Would you like fries with that?”
Fanzone groaned. “Did I ask for fries with that? No, I don’t want fries. I want onion rings. And a coke, large.”
“Would you like to add an apple pie for only a dollar-twenty-nine?”
“No. No pie.” Really, this thing must have been programmed by a greedy gradeschooler. Or that guy Powell. Probably Powell. Ever since the fiasco with the Soundwave toys last Christmas, the former CEO wannabe couldn’t get a job at a car wash. Not that Fanzone gave a flip - good riddance, so long as the guy wasn’t turning to crime to make a living.
Hm, that was a thought - he really should check up on just what Powell was up to these days. The guy had barely stayed on the good side of the law when he was filthy rich. No telling what the slimeball’d be willing to do now that he’d lost his fortune.
“Here’s your order, sir.”
Fanzone turned back to the service center as parts of it opened up, a pair of robotic arms extending from either side of the menu as the menu itself dropped down like a drawbridge to reveal the proffered tray . . . with more food than he’d actually ordered: a wrapped sandwich - by the size and shape, it wasn’t a Mega-Meaty - an order of fries, two orders of onion rings, and two large soda cups. The arms picked up the tray to hand to him, clipped the top edge of his door with said tray, and wound up dumping the whole thing into his car.
Fanzone jumped, cursing at the mess now strewn across his lap, lukewarm soda soaking into his trousers. “Augh! You stupid, robotic piece of-! This is why I hate machines!”
Name: Dragon
Age: 35
Personal LJ: dragondancer515
Email / AIM / MSN: dragondancer5150@yahoo.com (both email and AIM [yes the whole thing])
Character Information
Character Name: Captain Carmine Fanzone
Fandom: Transformers Animated
Source: http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Captain_Fanzone
Character History: Fanzone is the captain of the Detroit Metro Police Dept. He’s in his early to mid-50’s and married, though he has no children. His life was fairly normal, his job routine, until the day he was leading a SWAT team against a biotech nano-monster . . . and several of the on-hand emergency vehicles, including his own car (he initially thought), turned out to be transforming robots in disguise. Thus he was introduced to the Autobots. After that, his life got weird.
He’s been held hostage by a transforming harrier jet, chosen machines over bio-enhanced humans for his police force (at least they have an off-switch when they malfunction and go berserk), and faced off with mechanical dinosaurs. He developed respect and trust for the Autobot named Prowl when the two were forced to work together after Prometheus Black, apparently now calling himself “Meltdown,” had the so-called “Dinobots” kidnap Sari Sumdac. Fanzone even went so far as to say that Prowl wasn’t bad “for a robot” and to recognize that the two of them had made a pretty good team.
That new trust, however, was severely strained with Megatron’s comeback and the resulting battle that destroyed a good half of the city . . . and the arrival of the arrogant and organophobic Elite Guard didn’t help anything. Fanzone was anything but impressed especially by the condescending, self-important Sentinel Prime. The new robot’s continued harassment of Optimus Prime didn’t escape his notice either, whatever he himself thought of the mech. Of course, he held no more love for a certain usurper CEO, one Porter C. Powell, when the shrewd and unprincipled businessman got his employee Henry Masterson released of charges by pointing out, among other things, that robots had no rights, thereby nullifying the wrongs done to Sentinel and (more importantly in Fanzone’s book) Optimus.
Things got more personally uncomfortable when Optimus’s crew, after being ordered to prepare to leave, went to Fanzone about taking in Sari Sumdac. Her father, Professor Isaac Sumdac, had been missing since Megatron’s rise and subsequent disappearance, and she had been made homeless by Powell’s take-over of her father’s company, Sumdac Systems. It would have been the right thing to do - the girl did need a legal guardian despite having no legal proof of her existence, and the police captain hadn’t pursued the matter since the Autobots were taking care of her and he had other things to focus on - but he made no pretense of disappointment at being released from that obligation when Ultra Magnus changed his decree and allowed Optimus and crew to remain on Earth.
With the Elite Guard’s departure, life returned to as close to normal as it got since the Autobots had revealed themselves initially. Fanzone was on-hand to break up an argument between an elderly, argumentative citizen and an elderly, argumentative medi-bot, suggesting that Ratchet work on his people skills. Coming from Fanzone, that says quite a lot. Later, he wound up working with Bumblebee and Sari to take down Master Disaster, which included an altercation with Blitzwing . . . and a lesson in breaking the rules for both of his immature partners. Fanzone later got to turn the tables on Powell in a reversal of the Headmaster incident when he refused to arrest Optimus Prime for employing some harmless strong-arm tactics and… borrowing a device from Powell, which was returned if not in the same good shape it was procured.
Fanzone was underwhelmed by two “friends” of Bulkhead’s, telling the wrecker-bot to let his “Constructicon” buddies know that Fanzone didn’t appreciate illegal horseplay from anyone, especially machines. He was equally underwhelmed by the Soundwave toy he was given for Christmas . . . until it activated and mind controlled him - then he wasn’t aware of anything.
Perhaps Fanzone’s greatest adventure - or greatest headache, as he’d tell it - was the time he found himself transported to another world. He’d gone to Sumdac Tower trying to get help with some malfunctioning police drones, but Ratchet was busy struggling to understand Bulkhead’s clumsy handwritten instruction for operating the space bridge that had been built on the roof, so Fanzone’s pleas for aid fell on deaf ears. Never mind that the drones were firing at him with lethal prejudice. Ratchet did something wrong - or right, depending on how one looked at it - and accidentally activated the space bridge, which promptly sucked up Fanzone away from the attacking drones . . . and dumped him on Cybertron. If Fanzone had ever stopped to think about what his own personal hell would look like, this would pretty much have been it.
Fanzone found himself alone in a world made up entirely of oversized machines. Organophobic machines, no less. Thankfully, he wasn’t alone for long - Ratchet had followed him. The cranky old medi-bot saved him from getting stomped on like a cockroach, then decided to take a leisurely tour of the city before bothering to try to get them both home. Well . . . to be fair, Fanzone couldn’t have faulted him that too much. This crazy, mechanized place was Ratchet’s home, after all. Had Fanzone been stuck on Cybertron for years, he’d have been pretty damned happy to see Detroit again. Hell, he was going to be pretty damned happy to see Detroit again as it was. Still, it was good to see the old medi-bot genuinely happy and at peace for the first time since Fanzone had met him (even if it was short-lived).
Things went from what was really only “annoying” bad to “serious” bad in a hurry, however, when the two discovered the current climate of paranoia that Sentinel Prime had instigated, with propaganda that reminded Fanzone all too uncomfortably of The Red Scare from his own country’s Cold War era. Then the arrogant, full-of-himself machine himself showed up, trying to arrest Ratchet for several violations of his so-called security measures and Fanzone basically for existing. Neither of them took too well to that, but they went along with things for the moment when Omega Supreme showed up without warning, floating overhead.
The two accompanied Sentinel Prime as he appeared before the Autobot Council demanding sanction to fire on the enormous and apparently comatose robot. Fanzone listened in silence to the heated argument between Sentinel and Ratchet, and wondered how in the hell such a paranoid loose cannon had risen to the rank he had. Things turned ugly when Sentinel once more called for Ratchet’s arrest, this time for subversion and treason. Ratchet, Fanzone realized, was not only trying to avert widespread destruction, he was trying to save the life of a friend. Fanzone was not about to stand by and allow the arrest of the only one in the room who seemed to have any real integrity and his head on straight - not to mention Fanzone’s ticket home. Faking a violent sneeze that caused the two advancing soldiers to pause for fear of organic contamination, Fanzone bought Ratchet the precious seconds he needed to escape, taking Fanzone with him.
Ratchet thanked Fanzone for his help, recognizing that he’d not needed to involve himself. In response, Fanzone just expressed his opinion of Sentinel, his way of saying he’d been glad to do it. They had escaped down into some old, forgotten service tunnels below the city, and Fanzone listened sympathetically as Ratchet shared just a little history with him. They discovered, however, that these tunnels and the research facility they led to weren’t as abandoned as Ratchet had believed. In fact, they had found the hideout of the much-sought-for traitor, who turned out to be none other than the Decepticon Shockwave. A brief fight ensued. Fanzone didn’t get half of what they were talking about - activation codes what? - but he saw the effect that threatening to “go to the source” had on Ratchet. Fanzone watched in horror as Ratchet was thrown over the ledge into what looked to him like a bottomless pit while the infiltrator escaped, and was relieved when Ratchet managed to rescue himself, lifting himself back to the bridge on his magnetic powers. “I’m getting too old for this,” Ratchet bemoaned. Fanzone could relate.
Fanzone put his years of experience in police work to use and proved invaluable to Ratchet when he helped locate a small-time crook who could get them a forged security clearance into the Autobots’ high-security medical facility, and then played “bad cop” to Ratchet’s “good cop” to get the guy to cooperate, capitalizing on his being an organic. Merely threatening to spit on the shady robot was enough to make him cave . . . though not enough to make him give them a working security card.
The timely approach of Sentinel’s right-hand man solved the problem. Ratchet reacted defensively to his appearance, but Fanzone had known about him tailing them pretty much since they’d first entered the tunnels and assured the medi-bot that if he’d meant to arrest them, he’d have done it long before then. Instead, the other mech turned out to be a secret ally, giving them a working access card before backing off again, presumably to return “empty-handed” to Sentinel. Ratchet and Fanzone entered the facility, and the medic went straight for the “robot dame in a room.” Fanzone was less than impressed with Ratchet’s “explanation” of everything going on. Shockwave’s arrival pre-empted any further explanation until Fanzone threatened to jump off the fem-bot’s gurney, saying he wasn’t going any further until he started getting some real answers. Ratchet’s hurried reply made about as much sense to Fanzone as anything else so far, but Shockwave’s pursuit kept them from going into any more detail. Ratchet hid Fanzone and the unconscious “intel-bot” in a room while he tried to face Shockwave. From the explosive noises of combat, Fanzone could only guess it wasn’t going too well. And then the room he was in erupted in chaos as something was smashed through the wall. By the time Fanzone pulled himself from the rubble, Sentinel had arrived (late) to the party, Ratchet had the oversized sledgehammer Shockwave had been carrying, and Shockwave had escaped with the dame.
Fanzone listened in satisfaction as the council head gave that incompetent Sentinel what-for, though for himself, he was just more than ready to head home. Ratchet was ready to go back too, but at last minute, it was more like making a break for it when the medi-bot refused to give up the hammer first. Not that Fanzone would have wanted the pompous “acting magnus” to have it either. The pair arrived safely back on the roof of Sumdac Tower only to be followed by the mech that had helped them down in the tunnels, Jazz. Ratchet reiterated his refusal to give up the weapon to the Elite Guard, but Jazz apparently had jumped ship, himself fed up with Sentinel and saying that his instinct told him he needed to be here anyway. That was, if they’d have him. Fanzone, to be fair, recognized the guy’s usefulness and that he wasn’t bad . . . for a machine. Still, all he could bring himself to say was a groan of “all we need…another robot.”
A few weeks later, Fanzone spotted Optimus Prime . . . flying. Not all that well, really - though he managed to keep the collateral damage to a minimum - but still, Fanzone felt it could only be an omen for things to come. And he was right - very shortly after this, three new robots the size of Omega Surpreme showed up, going straight for Sumdac Tower. There was nothing Fanzone could do as he witnessed what looked like Prime and Prowl take them on alone. Ratchet’s new hammer, which Prime was now carrying, had a nifty power to it, though - Prime created a hurricane that caught and flung the three massive machines clear out over Lake Erie. Unfortunately, two of them managed to come back. At some point, the faces in their headplates changed, though Fanzone didn’t know what to make of that. What he did get was that the robots were now enormous walking bombs that were set to wipe Detroit off the map in an attempt to be rid of Megatron and the Autobots for good. Fanzone watched, helpless, as Prime defeated and disarmed one of the robots only for a force field of some kind to trap both him and Megatron with the other. Fanzone could only hope the mysterious force field would contain the blast, but he feared for Prime’s life . . . until some force, like a hand made of energy, seemed to pull him safely free. The force field did indeed contain the blast, but Megatron too somehow survived, if much the worse for wear. Fanzone witnessed the final fight between Optimus Prime and Megatron, defeating the Decepticon leader once and for all, and refusing to kill him. Instead, in a move that made the police captain almost proud of him, Prime clapped cuffs on Megatron and, finally, the Autobots were able to return to their own home of Cybertron.
Fanzone would never admit to missing the alien machines, but life’s just not been the same without them.
Character Personality: Fanzone’s a “been there, done that” kind of guy with a dry, sarcastic sense of humor and a deadpan delivery. He’s not completely unfazable, but it takes a lot to surprise - let alone unnerve - him. Especially since giant, alien robots have invaded his hometown of Detroit. Now, even their massive altercations do little more than piss him off when they destroy half his city in the process. He’s the rock in the storm when the shit hits the fan and chaos breaks out - he’ll take charge and start barking orders to get the situation under control. He’s not afraid to include the Autobots in that, either, if Optimus Prime hasn’t already gotten his own men moving.
He’s a good guy, if old-fashioned. He’s one of those who’d rather use paper and pen than fart around with a computer, and he only has a cell phone because his line of work requires him to have one. He doesn’t really outright “hate” technology - not like, say, Prometheus Black (Meltdown). It’s more of an “I’m old” sort of thing. The old dog who doesn’t do new tricks. That, and the fact that technology seems have no love for him either, or maybe it does but more like “loves to play practical jokes” sort of thing. Still, it doesn’t keep him from using technology if it’s the best means to the necessary end.
Again, Fanzone’s a good man and a good cop. He works to protect his city and its citizens, be that from two-bit human crooks or from Megatron himself. If he can’t handle something, he’s not too proud to find someone who can. Whatever will get the job done. Despite his age (and girth), he’s got quick reflexes, able to tackle someone out of the way of harm. And he’ll not hesitate to act, to protect people and to stand against those threatening innocents or otherwise disturbing the peace.
Regarding the Autobots, he’s got mixed feelings. He’s been to Cybertron. The experience is one he’d not want to repeat even if he didn’t “hate” giant robots and other machines. Sentinel Prime is a pompous and incompetent jerk, and he’s not so sure about that Ultra Magnus guy, either. Optimus Prime and his crew, however, are another story. While on the surface, he still gives them all kinds of guff for continually (if inadvertently) trashing his city, he’s watched them in action, even worked alongside them, enough times that they have most definitely earned his respect. He’s the closest - if it can be considered “close” - to Ratchet, though that’s a more recent development stemming from their time together on Cybertron. Both of them are up in years and have been around the block enough times that they’ve seen and done just about everything. Both are old dogs trying to keep up with the young pups without looking like they’re “trying” to keep up, while at the same time doing their damnest to keep the young and stupid ones from getting killed in the line of duty. Both are gruff and crabby on the outside, as much as anything to protect the true heart within that really does care about the people around them. Fanzone’s found something of a kindred spirit in the old medic . . . not that he’d ever admit aloud to such a ridiculous attachment to a “machine.” He’s got a reputation to uphold, after all.
Powers: No powers to speak of. In that respect, he’s a normal human. He’s a well-trained cop, able to spot a tail - and pretend he hasn’t - or find the kind of criminal he wants in probably literally any city if he needs information. He’s got really good reflexes and is trained in all kinds of firearms, able to handle anything from a handgun to a bazooka.
Actually . . . I take that back. He has one…power…if it can be called that. More of a knack, or an anti-knack. He and Murphy’s Law butt heads when it comes to technology of any kind. He has the phenomenally poor luck of things just not working right. When it’s critical, he doesn’t have too much of a problem - even a “percussive” solution might actually work (like putting his fist through a control panel to get a swiveling walkway to operate) - but more casually, he’s likely to experience just about any little malfunction possible. He won’t be able to switch to a second call on his phone, or the phone will hang up a call to a pitched squeal in his ear. A condiments-dispenser ‘bot will refuse to give him mayo, wind up dumping ketchup instead, then shower him in napkins. Most of his mishaps are mere irritants, nothing harmful . . . but they’re enough - and frequent enough - for him to have developed his well-known mantra, “This is why I hate machines!”
Samples
First person:
-eck is this? My phone’s got some kinda video conferencing on it or something now? …great. Just how long was I out?
Good afternoon. My name’s Captain Fanzone with the Detroit Police. If anyone gets this, I need to talk to this city’s mayor. Or Chief of Police. Or something. I don’t-?! …the heck?
[has spotted something off-camera, recording is forgotten for a moment]
Great. They got giant robots here too, huh? I musta got caught in one of those “space bridge” contraptions an didn’t know it. Guess one’a those Autobots must have been testin’ some new bridge thing an’ failed ta report it first. Just tell me I didn’t get slingshot all the way to Cybertron again. For that matter, whatever idiot sent me here better find me an’ pull me back pronto!
Oh, for the love of-! Is this thing still recording? All right . . . how do I turn it off?
[presses buttons until it zaps him with a jolt of electricity - he drops the phone]
Ah! It bit me. The blasted thing bit me! This is why I hate machines! Argh!
Third Person:
Fanzone wasn’t looking forward to his meeting with Mayor Edsel, and he sure as hell wasn’t doing it on an empty stomach. He didn’t have a whole lot of time, though, so he decided to brave the drive-through at Burger Bot.
“Welcome to Burger Bot. May I take your order?” came the scratchy, synthesized voice of the robotic service center attached to the side of the fast-food restaurant.
“Ah, yeah . . . I’ll have a Mega-Meaty cheeseburger, onion rings, and a large coke.”
“Would you like fries with that?”
Fanzone groaned. “Did I ask for fries with that? No, I don’t want fries. I want onion rings. And a coke, large.”
“Would you like to add an apple pie for only a dollar-twenty-nine?”
“No. No pie.” Really, this thing must have been programmed by a greedy gradeschooler. Or that guy Powell. Probably Powell. Ever since the fiasco with the Soundwave toys last Christmas, the former CEO wannabe couldn’t get a job at a car wash. Not that Fanzone gave a flip - good riddance, so long as the guy wasn’t turning to crime to make a living.
Hm, that was a thought - he really should check up on just what Powell was up to these days. The guy had barely stayed on the good side of the law when he was filthy rich. No telling what the slimeball’d be willing to do now that he’d lost his fortune.
“Here’s your order, sir.”
Fanzone turned back to the service center as parts of it opened up, a pair of robotic arms extending from either side of the menu as the menu itself dropped down like a drawbridge to reveal the proffered tray . . . with more food than he’d actually ordered: a wrapped sandwich - by the size and shape, it wasn’t a Mega-Meaty - an order of fries, two orders of onion rings, and two large soda cups. The arms picked up the tray to hand to him, clipped the top edge of his door with said tray, and wound up dumping the whole thing into his car.
Fanzone jumped, cursing at the mess now strewn across his lap, lukewarm soda soaking into his trousers. “Augh! You stupid, robotic piece of-! This is why I hate machines!”