A couple quick reviews, and a couple longer ones...in other words, long post is long, lol
So I keep sucking at being around consistently...I don't like this, T.T But, I know I keep saying "I'll be back now...", so I'm gonna say nothing and just cross my fingers, lol
But, here's a few places I've been/things that have happened while I've been gone:
-I made an A in physics over the summer! yaaaay! This means I will never have to look at physics again for the rest of my life, *happy sigh*
-I have 3 english classes this semester, and while I'm busy, it's the first time in pretty much ever that I've enjoyed school this much. I'm thinking this english grad school plan might be the best one.
-My cat, Socks, almost died. We boarded her while we were on vacation, and when I came back and picked her up nobody told me anything was wrong but when I got her home she immediately started peeing blood. Considering she's 15 years old and already diagnosed with renal failure, I kind of freaked out, and took her to the clinic first thing Monday morning after talking to my tech friends and decided taking her to the emergency clinic wasn't a good idea. They diagnosed her with a UTI, which is what I'd expected even though I'd feared something worse, and they put her on Clavamox and I breathed a lot easier. I was sure she was fine. But then she stopped eating and started throwing up and then even stopped drinking, all on one day, and then I REALLY freaked the fuck out. Took her back to the clinic, and initially they told us it was either the medicine had hurt her stomach, which we could fix, or her kidneys were failing, in which case we'd have to have her put down...like, that day. I was...I hate even thinking about it. I was miserable and frantic and lost and realized that I literally could not imagine my life without her. I remember things from before I got her, but I've had her so long now that I don't remember how to do it...the thought was terrifying. But, it ended up just being the meds. Some of her kidney levels in fact look better than they did in December, so her meds are helping manage it and she's actually doing really well all things considered. So she needed about a week of intensive care, fluids and warmth and such to get her back on her feet, but she's looking much better now and putting some weight back on. I get to keep my baby girl awhile longer, it seems. *huge sigh of relief*
-I went to Dragon*Con! This should've gotten a whole post to itself(and hell, eventually it still might I guess...), but it was the most amazing thing ever, :D It was incredible and just cemented how much I love con and how Dragon*Con is now my favorite time of year, lmao
Some freaking awesome people I got to see:
-Carrie Fisher(I've only been idolizing Leia all my life...)
-Misha Collins(squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! :D)
-Samantha Ferris(She's SO nice, <3)
-Mark Sheppard(again, squee!!!!!!)
-Gareth David-Lloyd(oh dear God, I think his voice killed me)
-Sylvester McCoy(I still haven't seen any of the 7th Doctor, but I really want to!)
-William Shatner(I still can't believe that this happened, lol)
-Jim Beaver(:D)
So yeah, that was....un-fucking-believably, honestly. Best weekend ever, :D :D :D
And, recently(as in yesterday, lol), I finally realized I have an internet connection/computer now that doesn't hate YouTube, so I've been able to start getting videos uploaded! Here's some from con:
Samantha Ferris talking about camaraderie< at con
Misha, talking about the most surprising thing he's seen at con
Misha talking about having food poisoning
a little bit of William Shatner
Sylvester McCoy playing the spoons to the Doctor Who theme song
Misha being asked if he's done any audiobooks
tiny piece of Gareth's Torchwood commentary
and another one, lol
a little bit of Gareth and Mark Sheppard
and my longest video, a portion of the Monday Supernatural panel with Jim, Samantha, Mark, Julie, and Misha, ^^
-Though I miss writing and participating in fandom and I'm determined to get both those things back in my life on a regular basis I'm...happy. The happiest I've been in years. I think I've learned a lot even just in the past month or so about myself, and that's a good thing. More importantly I think I've learned...I'm happy with who I am now. Fuck the past, nothing I can do about it anyway, and the future isn't worth worrying about. I think way too much about the endings of things, most of the time before they've even gotten to the middle...I've gotta stop that, gotta just sink into loving where I'm at and what I've got and stop thinking about when/if I'm gonna lose it. And I think now, I'm getting better at that all the time. So...that's where I'm at. It's a good place, :)
So I already briefly talked about this, but the Kane show was pretty much utter fucking amazingness, :D Doors at the Cotton Eyed Joe opened at 6, so me and my best friend, Amanda, were there waiting for them to open, hehe Which, a note about how awesome she is...she only knows Chris from Angel, and she really doesn't like country music, but she wanted to come with me anyway, cause she's just an awesome friend like that, :) So we got in and looked for the guys(no such luck so far, though there were American Made shirts for sale that I would've LOVED to be able to get me, but I am so poor I'm skipping lunch most days now, so that wasn't an option right now. sigh.), then got her food, then looked for the guys...lol
At that point, we gave up on them being there for awhile and just hung out and drank a little...speaking of which, lynchburg lemonade in a can is AWESOME; I had no idea such a thing existed! lol Anyway, so we had some alcohol and had a great time hanging out and sitting on saddles at the bar(lmao) and waiting around until it seemed like it was close to show time. Which, the thing is, we had no idea when that was...everything we had seen had just talked about the doors opening at 6, so we were clueless as to time and I was kind of twitchy cause I didn't want to get far from the stage in case it was close to time. Anyway, so around like...8:30 I guess, we wandered over close to the entrance to the dance floor and started hovering, cause we knew we'd have to go in there to get up next to the stage. Speaking of which, do you know how weird it is to see people line dancing to Billie Jean? It's extremely weird, at least for me, lol
So eventually, as we're standing there in this super tight crowd with people squeezing by behind us in this little narrow area people were walking through, and all of a sudden there's Steve, lmao I was probably semi hilarious, cause I felt like I was kinda mesmerized seeing him again, lol Because like I remember from before, but geez! He's so gorgeous and amazing and just so Steve(lol), and his eyes just kill me and he smells incredible and...yeah. So I'm standing there all "*squeak* ...Steve....", and she's smiling at me cause I'm probably grinning like an idiot(though she says I just looked really happy and not stupid, lol), and THEN we realize that this guy who had passed us a few seconds before that had like, knocked Amanda into me from behind with his bag cause there was like NO room in there had to be Christian, and I hadn't even recognized him! Now granted, I hadn't really gotten a good look at him and he did have his ballcap on, but I still felt like a terrible Kaniac, lmao But at that point I was all "OMG must get to stage", because I was bound and determined to get front row this time.
It ended up working out pretty perfectly, because we swarmed up there with the crowd and were able to slip into the last two front row spots just to the right of where Chris was gonna be, :D I squee-d a little and resisted the urge to bounce(lmao), and the boys came up to tune their guitars. From this point on, the internal squee-ing was pretty much constant, lmao Not to mention, from this point on the slasher in me started poking me relentlessly, XD Because, ok, so they both sit up there and tune their guitars, and it's awesome getting to watch them. And then Chris gets up and leaves his...and Steve picks it up and tunes it again, lmfao It was just so sweet and adorable that I literally couldn't stop smiling, lol Steve's always looking out for him, <3
From there it's another like...20 minutes maybe, and then they came back to start the show, :D I'd been wondering where the band was since it'd just been the two of them and their acoustics setting up, and he said something about the rest of the band not being able to make it...if there's anyone else out there who was at this show and caught the reason that'd be great, cause I couldn't quite hear what he said beyond that they couldn't be there so it was just gonna be him and Steve playing acoustic. At that point, I think my heart kind of exploded in advance because, an acoustic show, with just them? *dies* ...I'm pretty sure that'd be part of my heaven, lol
The show itself was absolutely incredible. It was amazing getting to hear some unexpected songs(especially More Than I Deserve and One More Shot, omg...), and hearing them like that...<3 It was amazing, too, because they just looked like they were having so much fun. Chris apologized a few times for not having the full band, but personally...much as I love them like that, I'd prefer this any day. They kept looking at each other and there was plenty of smiling and laughing and at one point Chris mentioned how it'd been years since they’d done a show like that, and he was grinning like he was having a blast. A couple of things that were adorable:
Sometime pretty close to the start of the set, just after the first couple songs I think, Chris asked if someone could get him another shot of Jack(there was no bottle! :( They just had their beers and they both started off with shots of Jack that went away immediately, lol), and then they went on and played the next song. Well, it was either at the end of that one or the next one, a police officer walks up to the side of the stage with a shot of Jack to hand him, and Chris takes it and then he’s all “Well, I’m gonna say something I don’t think I’ve ever said before…thank you, officer.”, and Steve and everyone else was cracking up and Chris just made this face like ‘I cannot believe I said that’, lmao, XD Then poor Steve was all “But I’m kinda mad at him, cause he didn’t bring me one!” and Chris just said “Ah, don’t be mad at him!”. Later, during House Rules someone in the audience right behind me got Chris another shot, and when he took it from her he was like “You put something in this?”, with this fucking adorable ‘just kidding’ wink and grin and even though it was directed at her, I was in the line of fire so it’s miraculous I didn’t melt, lmao
Then, when they were getting ready to do…I think it was the second to last song, people started yelling out requests, and someone over to the right asked for Let’s Take A Drive, which I immediately seconded, because that’s possssssibly my favorite Kane song…I can never decide what my favorite actually is, but it’s up there, lol But anyway, Chris first said (really sweet and apologetic), that they couldn’t do that because it took the whole band, so I asked for America High and a couple of other people called out some other things, but he was still thinking/talking about Let’s Take A Drive and how he was really sorry but they couldn’t do it without the band…but then Steve says “I can do it.”, :D It was just so…I don’t even know, but I loved it, Steve just being all “hell, we can work this out”, and at first Chris was all “We can?”, but then they went with it and of course it sounded amazing, <3 The funny thing, though, was that Chris is going through the song, just singing, and then all of a sudden he gets this “…wait a second…” look on his face, and grabs his guitar to pick it up and start playing. Well in the process, his guitar strap knocks over the beer sitting at his feet and it starts like, spilling around the wires and shit and he made this really cute “oh shit” face and was trying to stand it back up with his boot, and then finally just gave up and started playing guitar, hahaha, XD They finished it up together, and then he’s all “Yeah, I completely forgot I’m supposed to play on that one”, and Steve’s all “I noticed.”, and grinning at him like, “Oh, Christian”, and I was this mix of like, laughing and internal flailing, lmao
So during House Rules, there’s of course the traditional amazing rule #7 moment(that makes my heart stop, every freaking time, lol), but then they stopped for a second and he collected some of their mardi gras beads, and then he hugged this one girl, which lead to him hugging several more girls, lol And at the time I was sooo jealous/sad because I was RIGHT THERE on the front row and I was wanting to get a hug too(of course, lol), and he hugged this girl right next to me but I hadn’t gotten one and I was all :(….BUT then they finished, and they were packing up, and he’d stopped to hug a couple of other people and he was right there in front of me cause he was packing up…and I was like “…oh fuck it”, lmao, because if it was my only chance I figured I had to make another attempt. So I said “Christian!” and I held my arms out like ‘hug please?’, and he smiled and held up a finger like ‘1 second’, and he finished shoving a couple things in his bag and then came over and hugged me!! That, I…I seriously felt high. Because he hugged me really tight(and dear God his arms! He’s so fucking strong! I mean, I knew that, obviously, but it’s waaaaay different knowing it and feeling it. O.O *dies*), and it felt amazing and he smelled good and he said “Thank you so much, darlin’.” and even after hearing him say something like that to other people hearing it directed it me damn near killed me, lmao
So then I’m like, standing there in a daze pretty much, hahaha I felt like I was gonna either faint or die or like, start shaking or who knows what, and I could not stop smiling, so I felt like I had to be looking really stupid again but Amanda still said I just looked really freaking happy and not stupid, lol But yeah that was…pretty much the best thing ever. Actually, yeah, I think there’s no pretty much about it…best thing ever. <3 Sigh.
After that, they were still hanging around so we were gonna see if maybe I could go over and get Chris to sign House Rules for me, but they were off in this back roped off corner thingy having a drink so it didn’t look like they were gonna be coming back out, but I was really too happy to be sad about that just then, lol and I did get one last glimpse of Steve! …his eyes kill me, I swear. I have no idea how I carried on coherent conversation with him in December, but I hope however I managed it comes back to me again if I get another chance, because I can’t imagine how it worked, lmao
In conclusion…I love these boys so much it’s ridiculous…and I love that, too, XD
And ok, some slasher-y/fandom-y-ness…the looks they were doin’ were killing me. I mean, fuck, just look at Steve’s face in this picture.
And then there’s this one!
I was dying to show those to people who would squee and flail over them the way I did when I got home and saw them, haha, XD I want to write so much fic now it’s insane, but that’s great, because if I had to pick one OTP…well, these guys would probably be tied with Sam/Dean, but that’s close to picking one OTP, ^^ And…and yes. Muse is inspired, ;)
And, I managed to get videos uploaded! None of them are full songs(though Spirit Boy is pretty close), cause I always worry about memory card space and what else I might want to get, so I tend to just film things in snatches, lol So, here they are(and also, I have more pictures on my fb account, so if any of you that aren’t already friends with me would like to see them, just give me a link or something and I’ll add you! Also, I’m gonna try to get video from the show in December up soon too, ^^):
Spirit Boy
Middle American Saturday Night
Let’s Take A Drive
Let Me Go
House Rules
More Than I Deserve
Ok so first?
For me, this was hands down the best premiere I’ve been able to witness since I started watching Supernatural. The season 5 premiere left me heartsick and nauseous and miserable, and the season 6 premiere just pissed me off in about 5,000 ways, but this? This was awesome.
I loved so much about it, but I just…I loved my Sammy so freaking much. I loved the way he still had faith in Cas, because he knows what it’s like to fall so far and have no one really reach for you, especially the person/people you trust the most. I love that he’s struggling through his hallucinations to keep from putting weight on Dean(and I love how Dean seemed to accept that, after his initial anger). Speaking of which, though, the thought that Sam’s going through that fucking cut me, because I just….God, poor Sammy. That’s horrible. T.T
Binding Death was, I think, a crazy move but I know why they did it. And Cas…fuck, Cas. He broke my heart a lot, but I love that he came around and…he can’t be gone. He just can’t be. I have to believe that, because otherwise I’m going to cry. A lot.
And ok, there was supposed to be more of this, and some Leverage talk to, but I am super fucking tired, and this is crazy long already, XD night!