First Driving Lesson
OH MY GOD. RICH IS THE FUNNIEST MAN ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE. He's Karen's brother, and I almost died of laughter today.
He starts off by telling me about this chemistry teacher he had in high school. The guy got busted for having a crystal meth lab IN THE SCHOOL...was high as hell all the time, and babbled on all class. He ws like yeahhhh we knew somethin hadda be wrong with that guy...but half of us were high ourselves so we didn't care!
So realizing I am a dork and I laugh at everything..and don't get offended by his frequent swearing, he starts telling me this story about how he made some kid cry. He was like yeah, the kid was such a pussy...totally gay little kid. He was like..
Kid: "Straight here?"
Rich: "No, thats forward for you gay kids"
LOL... and then the kid went home to his mother AND CRIED. The mother called up and was like "you made my child cry, hes an honors student!!", and Karen was like..
karen: "Rich..what did you do to this kid?!"
Rich: "I don't know... what the hells wrong with him, what a fucking pussy" karen:"YEAH YOU SAID THAT TOO"
And then we get to a random stop sign in this dumb little part of East hartford where there are like 2 cars every 10 minutes. We stop at a little intersection..he takes a pissed off phonecall, and then teaches me about intersections. But before this, a sketch looking sorta homeless/East Hartford looking guy is wandering around, peering into the car, wondering why we're sitting there for like 10 minutes. So he LOCKS THE DOORS and goes "I don't want Freak Boy comin in"... omg I died.
Then he shit i can't remember. Give me like 5. Oh he told me all about how he thinks gay guys are hilarious, and hates annoying lesbians. He had to punch one the fuck out once... great story but its long. He apparently used to work at a gay bar, and she wanted to bring her drink where they're not allowed, and she goes 'whos gonna do somethin about it?' and he goes 'i am' and she tries to step up and fight like a man and he punched her out hahahhaa. The whole time i was thinking of Amanda Tower. BWUAHAHA.
I can't remember half my story :(
When we go pick up the second kid, he was dork-o-fabulous, and I was like "haaa look at this kid, he looks real special" and he craaacks up..he like giggles... its hilarious. Mr. Mccabe giggles too. that was random...
On the way from Marlborough I saw this guy with like... a huge dog in his beat as hell 70s suburban, hunting fur hat thing on, panels on the doors were different than the rest of it, PURE hick, and ws like "Hey Rich, you MIGHT be a redneck" and he started cracking up...I love that guy.
WOOHOO and I didn't even get nervous... i drive too slow when I don't knowwhere I'm going though..he's like GO YOU OLD LADY!
Thats all I can remember right now...I'll prob remember tomorrow, but I am definitely asking for him next time I schedule driving hours hahaha..He's like "i take requests"
Random story: Last night I fell asleep with the beginning of a headache, dreamt i had TWO headaches, and woke up with a really bad one. I went downstairs to get some drugs for it and thought it had snowed outside...but it was really just frost.
He starts off by telling me about this chemistry teacher he had in high school. The guy got busted for having a crystal meth lab IN THE SCHOOL...was high as hell all the time, and babbled on all class. He ws like yeahhhh we knew somethin hadda be wrong with that guy...but half of us were high ourselves so we didn't care!
So realizing I am a dork and I laugh at everything..and don't get offended by his frequent swearing, he starts telling me this story about how he made some kid cry. He was like yeah, the kid was such a pussy...totally gay little kid. He was like..
Kid: "Straight here?"
Rich: "No, thats forward for you gay kids"
LOL... and then the kid went home to his mother AND CRIED. The mother called up and was like "you made my child cry, hes an honors student!!", and Karen was like..
karen: "Rich..what did you do to this kid?!"
Rich: "I don't know... what the hells wrong with him, what a fucking pussy" karen:"YEAH YOU SAID THAT TOO"
And then we get to a random stop sign in this dumb little part of East hartford where there are like 2 cars every 10 minutes. We stop at a little intersection..he takes a pissed off phonecall, and then teaches me about intersections. But before this, a sketch looking sorta homeless/East Hartford looking guy is wandering around, peering into the car, wondering why we're sitting there for like 10 minutes. So he LOCKS THE DOORS and goes "I don't want Freak Boy comin in"... omg I died.
Then he shit i can't remember. Give me like 5. Oh he told me all about how he thinks gay guys are hilarious, and hates annoying lesbians. He had to punch one the fuck out once... great story but its long. He apparently used to work at a gay bar, and she wanted to bring her drink where they're not allowed, and she goes 'whos gonna do somethin about it?' and he goes 'i am' and she tries to step up and fight like a man and he punched her out hahahhaa. The whole time i was thinking of Amanda Tower. BWUAHAHA.
I can't remember half my story :(
When we go pick up the second kid, he was dork-o-fabulous, and I was like "haaa look at this kid, he looks real special" and he craaacks up..he like giggles... its hilarious. Mr. Mccabe giggles too. that was random...
On the way from Marlborough I saw this guy with like... a huge dog in his beat as hell 70s suburban, hunting fur hat thing on, panels on the doors were different than the rest of it, PURE hick, and ws like "Hey Rich, you MIGHT be a redneck" and he started cracking up...I love that guy.
WOOHOO and I didn't even get nervous... i drive too slow when I don't knowwhere I'm going though..he's like GO YOU OLD LADY!
Thats all I can remember right now...I'll prob remember tomorrow, but I am definitely asking for him next time I schedule driving hours hahaha..He's like "i take requests"
Random story: Last night I fell asleep with the beginning of a headache, dreamt i had TWO headaches, and woke up with a really bad one. I went downstairs to get some drugs for it and thought it had snowed outside...but it was really just frost.