i'd be the last person that would suspect for something like this. like i said before though, i am a coward. i can only imagine that maybe it hurts more to you that i am anonymous and right about your situation than you knowing my name and me being right about the situation. you will never know. i don't know what else much to say. if she likes you, she'd show you and not have to 'test' you and make you jump through hoops, she'd just do it. and i know she practically spends every day with you, but let me tell you something, you are very sparkly, people are attracted to sparkly things, but that just may be that. she just may want to be around that. i just don't think she's into it as much as you. she's not as mature. you're too adult for that. and another thing, i know you love doing things for people, but you have to put yourself first. what's this, you couldn't fix michelle shit? screw that, everyone is their own person, she was as normal as could be, besides using you and you allowed that, she just got whacked when she found out and realized that you were too good and too strong for her. and i applaud your move on that one, but i hate to see you in the same situation here. i know some things i shouldn't know, and i can't tell you, because i'm right.
I'm assuming that you think that you know me.. and who i am.
Maybe Jennifer wants to be around my sparkly personality? Who cares. I'd love to sit and chat with you about this in person. Because as much as you think you know. there is SO much more you have to learn about me.
I think its really sweet all these nice things that you have to say.
And maybe right now she isn't into it as much as i am.. it doesnt really matter. Because soon she will be. Soon she will be calling me in the morning just to hear my voice. Soon enough. ++ She will want to know who im hanging out with and why ++ She will want to know what i think and feel about everything. Its what i want! Its what i need!
I need her to want to need me. Make sense? Please.. lets talk. You seem to be a very intelligent person.
1. I do know you. 2. And you don't know that for a fact that she's going to want to do all of these things that you *hope* for. 3. At one point you were so independent, for like five minutes, and I hate to see you back in the codependent stage. You're too strong for that. And for that five minutes, I envied your strength. 4. I hope that she wants to do and be everything that you want in life, but some people will not succumb to that. 5. I really do wish for the best, I just don't believe it. I think that you're worth so much more. 6. You can't force someone to want you. You can push and push and push all you want, and they may say what you want to hear which isn't always the best thing, OR they will get tired of it and go away.
-Some things have happened in your life since you met her that makes me think that she's responsible for your actions, which is partly true, but not because you are your own person and you will make your own choices. I can't tell you what to do, and I will never do that. Some of these things have bothered me because I am infact a friend. I tell you these things because what I've heard and seen, I've done to other people and I know for a fact that I've hurt them. But you're going to learn through your mistakes. It's hard to believe an anonymous poster, you don't know who is behind the curtain, and I can tell you 'Trust Me' but I wouldn't expect you to believe it, either.
Again, I am a friend, a good friend, but I don't know just how much of a good friend if I must post like this, but I do know you, and I do know that you're worth so much more that you would never have to second guess someone, or ask someone "What should I do?" when you should in fact know what to do because that's what your heart is telling you. Someone who wants to be with you wouldn't test you, or trick you, or play games to find your worthiness. Love can not be forced. Love, a not so great friend.
Jordan, I just read your original post and read this; "Put your name, or don't even bother wasting your time or mine for that matter." I'm going to somewhat respect that and not post anymore. I'd rather do that than share my name. I don't want to hurt you anymore if I already have.
P.S. You didn't deserve those things Michelle did to you. You didn't. I know. I also know what happened to you when you were younger that Michelle teases you about. It wasn't your fault. You were only a child, maybe three years old if I remember right. It doesn't matter, you didn't deserve any of her words because she got whacko because she found out you were stronger than her. My apologies again, don't ask who I am. I'm sure you'd hate me then.
I wouldnt HATE you for telling me how you feel. That isnt a good friend at all. I understand what you mean.. and for that FIVE minute period where i felt great... i probably didnt feel all that great.. i was just passing it off like i knew what i was doing. And i dont. I always second guess myself. Its what i do best. But its people LIKE michelle that keep me second guessing ABOUT myself
ARGH i havent told very many people about this.. and i don't like the fact that you are a friend and can't tell me how you REALLY feel!
And you are SO right, love cannot be forced. And im not trying to force it.
Ahhh please talk to me at least online or something.. i know im like never on anymore.. only late at night.. but i would love to pick your brain!
i don't know what else much to say. if she likes you, she'd show you and not have to 'test' you and make you jump through hoops, she'd just do it. and i know she practically spends every day with you, but let me tell you something, you are very sparkly, people are attracted to sparkly things, but that just may be that. she just may want to be around that. i just don't think she's into it as much as you. she's not as mature. you're too adult for that.
and another thing, i know you love doing things for people, but you have to put yourself first. what's this, you couldn't fix michelle shit? screw that, everyone is their own person, she was as normal as could be, besides using you and you allowed that, she just got whacked when she found out and realized that you were too good and too strong for her. and i applaud your move on that one, but i hate to see you in the same situation here. i know some things i shouldn't know, and i can't tell you, because i'm right.
Reply
Maybe Jennifer wants to be around my sparkly personality? Who cares.
I'd love to sit and chat with you about this in person. Because as much as you think you know. there is SO much more you have to learn about me.
I think its really sweet all these nice things that you have to say.
And maybe right now she isn't into it as much as i am.. it doesnt really matter. Because soon she will be. Soon she will be calling me in the morning just to hear my voice.
Soon enough.
++ She will want to know who im hanging out with and why ++
She will want to know what i think and feel about everything.
Its what i want!
Its what i need!
I need her to want to need me.
Make sense?
Please.. lets talk.
You seem to be a very intelligent person.
Lets hear what u gotta say
Reply
2. And you don't know that for a fact that she's going to want to do all of these things that you *hope* for.
3. At one point you were so independent, for like five minutes, and I hate to see you back in the codependent stage. You're too strong for that. And for that five minutes, I envied your strength.
4. I hope that she wants to do and be everything that you want in life, but some people will not succumb to that.
5. I really do wish for the best, I just don't believe it. I think that you're worth so much more.
6. You can't force someone to want you. You can push and push and push all you want, and they may say what you want to hear which isn't always the best thing, OR they will get tired of it and go away.
-Some things have happened in your life since you met her that makes me think that she's responsible for your actions, which is partly true, but not because you are your own person and you will make your own choices. I can't tell you what to do, and I will never do that. Some of these things have bothered me because I am infact a friend. I tell you these things because what I've heard and seen, I've done to other people and I know for a fact that I've hurt them. But you're going to learn through your mistakes.
It's hard to believe an anonymous poster, you don't know who is behind the curtain, and I can tell you 'Trust Me' but I wouldn't expect you to believe it, either.
Again, I am a friend, a good friend, but I don't know just how much of a good friend if I must post like this, but I do know you, and I do know that you're worth so much more that you would never have to second guess someone, or ask someone "What should I do?" when you should in fact know what to do because that's what your heart is telling you. Someone who wants to be with you wouldn't test you, or trick you, or play games to find your worthiness.
Love can not be forced.
Love, a not so great friend.
Reply
"Put your name, or don't even bother wasting your time or mine for that matter."
I'm going to somewhat respect that and not post anymore. I'd rather do that than share my name. I don't want to hurt you anymore if I already have.
P.S. You didn't deserve those things Michelle did to you. You didn't. I know. I also know what happened to you when you were younger that Michelle teases you about. It wasn't your fault. You were only a child, maybe three years old if I remember right. It doesn't matter, you didn't deserve any of her words because she got whacko because she found out you were stronger than her.
My apologies again, don't ask who I am. I'm sure you'd hate me then.
Reply
That isnt a good friend at all.
I understand what you mean.. and for that FIVE minute period where i felt great... i probably didnt feel all that great.. i was just passing it off like i knew what i was doing. And i dont.
I always second guess myself. Its what i do best.
But its people LIKE michelle that keep me second guessing ABOUT myself
ARGH i havent told very many people about this.. and i don't like the fact that you are a friend and can't tell me how you REALLY feel!
And you are SO right, love cannot be forced. And im not trying to force it.
Ahhh please talk to me at least online or something.. i know im like never on anymore.. only late at night.. but i would love to pick your brain!
Reply
Leave a comment