Today's Match-Up: The Ottoman Empire vs The Spanish Disease
vs
The Ottoman Empire (former multi-ethnic, Turkish-ruled land empire) vs The Spanish Disease (aka Syphilis)
You want Rando? I got your Rando right here! Today's match pits the might of the Ottoman Empire against the ravages of one of the worst sexually transmitted infections to ravage humankind. Which will win? VOTE NOW!
Winner:
The Spanish Disease (14 votes)
over
The Ottoman Empire (2 votes)
Not a great turnout, but this was a decidedly one-sided fight. Syphilis claims yet another victim, and moves on to Round Deuce. Only two more weeks until the beginning of Round Two!
Featured commentaries:
Syphilis. Honestly, the only time you hear the word "Ottoman" anymore is in reference to something Dick Van Dyke tripped over in the opening of his show. Syphilis has the staying power we need in a champion.
Plus, it took the Ottoman Empire 400 years to get its shit together. Syphilis kills much quicker and drives you crazy in the process. - andsheewas
From Wikipedia...
Until that time, as Fracastoro notes, syphilis had been called the "French disease" in Italy and Germany, and the "Italian disease" in France. In addition, the Dutch called it the "Spanish disease", the Russians called it the "Polish disease", the Turks called it the "Christian disease" or "Frank disease" (frengi) and the Tahitians called it the "British disease".
So even if it doesn't kill you or turn your brain into swiss cheese, it still promotes jingoism.
Madness, piles o' bodies, imperial subjects suddenly enjoying a newfound pride in their respective homelands... sounds like the makings of the end of an empire to me.
The Syph for The Win. - cheesegimp
(sorry, Jim, looks like you'll have to infect yourself after all)