Chapter Nine

[whoreoftortuga]

"OY!" Evie shrieked and flapped her shawl at the monkey, who, quick as lightning, grasped hold of her banana, leapt in a blur of brownish gold to the poster of her bed and from there scampered up the velvet curtains to the canopy where he perched and made light work of the fruit, chattering at her the whole time

Comments

[desibarbossa]

I smiled a lot through this chapter. You got quite a bit of characterization in there and did an excellent job with touching on the effects of the curse (Poor, poor Hector! *sniffles*)

All in all though, I really loved the stuff with the monkey. Very cute ^_^

[whoreoftortuga]

thank you xx

have you written anything more of yours?

and oh my gosh i totally forgot to respond to your email... about betaing... i'm so sorry! :(

[desibarbossa]

It's okay, m'love. You're a busy lady :-P I actually did get Chapter 11 posted though, the link is posted on Barbossabeth; it was a real bitch for some reason because I actually had to nudge my plot to start getting this thing wrapped up. Next chapter is well on it's way and I'm having fun because it's very shippy, so to speak, but I have to be careful. Being that time of the month and I'll, I'm inclined to let Barbs transform into Captain Sap and I don't think we want that. Though a little sap never hurt him . . .

[whoreoftortuga]

yes sometimes you just hit those walls.

a little sentimentality, a little softness would be good i think, but yeah, over sap no good. i would really get on the ball to beta for you if you like. email it to me at ethebee@ihug.com.au when it's done.

i know i need a beta for my fic, but i'm far too lazy to edit once a chappie is done! lol.

[cazcatharsis]

i adore that line about evie and the monkey fightin' over him. :D

and it's fun to know where Jack the Monkey came from, and how the curse is slowly takin' effect, and how pleased he is to see her...

[whoreoftortuga]

merci beaucoup!

Thanks!

[pirate_dutchess]

Another great chapter, loved reading it.
It was a little low on the interesting parts ;) but one needs more then just that LOL.
Seriously you write very good, thanks for this!

Re: Thanks!

[whoreoftortuga]

oh no! what do you mean by interesting parts?
this isn't good at all!!!!

Re: Thanks!

[pirate_dutchess]

HAHAHA, what do you think i mean? ;)
Barbossa and Evie seemed less..active so to say, gotta love those hot moments.
But, honestly a good chapter!
Poor Hector, a passionate man like that must feel terrible about feeling his age, not to mention the curse soon being upon him.
I hope he get's to enjoy his evie a little yet before then..poor man indeed.

Re: Thanks!

[whoreoftortuga]

oh! *relieved* i thought the chapter as a whole was dull!

lol yes, not so much naughtiness in this one... as for what happens next well... it may not be so long before you find out! :D

[robes_of_earth]

I hate that bloody monkey. :D

An adorable little chapter; once again you suck me under from the first sentence, and straight away I'm there; seeing, hearing and smelling everything. A good smooth read, though I won't be too overly-praising and just say that there were a few spots where the punctuation was a little wonky, really only the passage where he feeds the monkey the apple. If you'd like me to tinker with it for you I'd be most happy.

Again though, the story only becomes more and more solid- things are starting to tie in to that we already recognise (can't believe you made me feel sorry for Jack!) -I can feel the pressure building too, and I love the way you've started the curse, with more of a sourness and effort, rather than no feeling at all. Gorgeous.

[whoreoftortuga]

this definitely isn't my favourite chapter, though I like parts of it. It's a bit of a mess. I'd be interested in seeing what you have to say; I will be making tiny edits to the entire body of work once it is done.

I like the monkey. :) I love little animals. But I thought it would be hilarious if Evie thought the monkey would be so cute only to find it a total pain. Plus it turns the whole Mary sue adored by all animals thing upside down... plus evie is a bit of a bitch. she has no patience and monkeys need lots of attention and stimulation she'd be unwilling to give.

[robes_of_earth]

Oh it was totally in character- Evie has too much of a short temper to handle something as unpredictable as a monkey.

She seems to like her comfort patterns- knowing everything is laid out where she likes it, knowing that her retirement is safe...she's a girl who moves the world around her to be to the best advantage- and a monkey is to hard to control.

Any of you in there? ;)

[whoreoftortuga]

hrrmmmm, a tad, I tend to fly by the seat of my knickers much more... have no long term future plans, certainly no savings, not so suspicious, I like unpredictability, much more flighty and spontaneous... tried not to do a self insert but we do share some characteristics!