In light of recent events
The first time I really thought about dying as a real thing wasn't at my grandad's funeral. It was nearly six years after that. Even in the aftermath of the NC fire, it still hasn't felt as real as the end of senior year. We were sitting in GEMS class doing one of our final assignments; writing a letter to our future selves, ten years down the road, addressing it to someone who's sure to be around. That part was easy. Then Ms. Graham said something that threw us all for a loop. "Write on the back what you want me to do with the letter if you aren't around in ten years."
What?
All of a sudden, thoughts poured into our heads. Is it even possible that our small tight knit class of 13 might lose a member in the next ten years? Is it possible I could lose one of my best friends? Is it possible that I, myself, could be gone? And what WOULD I want her to do with the letter? I don't even remember what I put on there. That was the first time death felt real, and close and painful. That class really showed our true potential. And our true selves. Things got personal. Things got deep. We weren't just answering questions on a worksheet. We thought hard, we worked hard. We bared our souls in the first week, and exchanged heartfelt goodbyes in the last.
And why am I sharing this realization? I don't know. But today in U101 we were talking about America's inability to accept death as a natural part of life and it made me think, 'have I accepted death?' I don't know. But do I really need to, right now? No. I'm aware of it's possibility. But not of it's inevitability. If that makes any sense. At all.
"Look around you...life is beautiful." Right now I'm just going to keep on living.
What?
All of a sudden, thoughts poured into our heads. Is it even possible that our small tight knit class of 13 might lose a member in the next ten years? Is it possible I could lose one of my best friends? Is it possible that I, myself, could be gone? And what WOULD I want her to do with the letter? I don't even remember what I put on there. That was the first time death felt real, and close and painful. That class really showed our true potential. And our true selves. Things got personal. Things got deep. We weren't just answering questions on a worksheet. We thought hard, we worked hard. We bared our souls in the first week, and exchanged heartfelt goodbyes in the last.
And why am I sharing this realization? I don't know. But today in U101 we were talking about America's inability to accept death as a natural part of life and it made me think, 'have I accepted death?' I don't know. But do I really need to, right now? No. I'm aware of it's possibility. But not of it's inevitability. If that makes any sense. At all.
"Look around you...life is beautiful." Right now I'm just going to keep on living.