(no subject)
dear diary,
it has been a long time, hasn't it?
it happens. whatever that is.
ok, so i was thinking now, maybe i don't even want a valentine, but maybe i won't even have one anyways. geeze sometimes life can be so topsy turby. i am starting to believe more and more that i don't even actively participate in anything good or bad that happens in my life. it's like fucking dodgeball.. some days i am the fat kid pegged---WAMMY, and man oh man does is OUCH! but then there are those days, when i wake up feeling skinny and i seem to be more fortunate, with a tight grasp on the ball ( metaphorically speaking and stuff) and then i get to call all the shots.
well anyways, i wouldn't expect you or anyone else for that matter to understand. cha.
well anyways again, right now i am just so at a loss for words, despite the above words and these continuing words. i just wonder what it would feel like if i believed that anything i do or did or will do is something i can control. because, i mean, it's clearly not really up to me at all... and no diary, i am not being a negative nancy or a nay sayer about anything. life is grande in its' own special way, but it's usually not about my way. i don't know what is what or how it all occurs. its just wammm bamm thank you mamm fat kid getting pegged out of nowhere and why the fuck me??!
so to sum it all up for you diary i am a little bit uneasy, especially with vagina disease day right around the corner...it's really gay anyhow, seriously though, who wants to be showered with love and affection?
cha, not me man, no way jose..
hows about a nice smackaroo in the face though.
BAM!
it has been a long time, hasn't it?
it happens. whatever that is.
ok, so i was thinking now, maybe i don't even want a valentine, but maybe i won't even have one anyways. geeze sometimes life can be so topsy turby. i am starting to believe more and more that i don't even actively participate in anything good or bad that happens in my life. it's like fucking dodgeball.. some days i am the fat kid pegged---WAMMY, and man oh man does is OUCH! but then there are those days, when i wake up feeling skinny and i seem to be more fortunate, with a tight grasp on the ball ( metaphorically speaking and stuff) and then i get to call all the shots.
well anyways, i wouldn't expect you or anyone else for that matter to understand. cha.
well anyways again, right now i am just so at a loss for words, despite the above words and these continuing words. i just wonder what it would feel like if i believed that anything i do or did or will do is something i can control. because, i mean, it's clearly not really up to me at all... and no diary, i am not being a negative nancy or a nay sayer about anything. life is grande in its' own special way, but it's usually not about my way. i don't know what is what or how it all occurs. its just wammm bamm thank you mamm fat kid getting pegged out of nowhere and why the fuck me??!
so to sum it all up for you diary i am a little bit uneasy, especially with vagina disease day right around the corner...it's really gay anyhow, seriously though, who wants to be showered with love and affection?
cha, not me man, no way jose..
hows about a nice smackaroo in the face though.
BAM!