wtf, live journal, me? Since when?
i woke up this morning at a moderate time and i didnt get the breakfast talk:
"hey good morning, how did you sleep?"
"good." Takes another bite of cereal.
not that i ever have, but its another reminder that im not in a movie. Things go wrong, people get hurt and confused, and sometimes the bad guys win. What does this really have to do with me? I honestly am having trouble producing an answer to that question in my mind.
Maybe its because i dont watch the news. The fucking SWAT team rolled into the old neighborhood Saturday and i knew nothing about that. My dad asked me if i read the paper tonight. I said to him without blinking, turning my head or changing the tone of my voice "not enough" like i actually have ever opened a paper to read it. the only thing i knwo that goes on around me is my band, my closest friends (which is how i found out about the SWAT team in the first place), my girl, and my parents.
(which reminds me, 10:30, gotta call the g/f)
Maybe its because in the past few weeks i have seen my girlfriend less and less. I mean everyone worries, but im not too worried about losing her. i just worry that one day ill never see her again for whatever reason. I just miss the hell out of her, shes cute, adorable, too fucking smart, and absolutely hopefully loves me. So it is taking some adjusting.
"i just feel like i have seen you less and less these past few weeks and it sucks"
"i know... i miss you"
and another small thing, i ended up not seeing her today and i was hoping to, so that kinda sucked.
Maybe its because i want my band to be okay. Marc and Eddie are in a fight, and it just sucks. Like, i dont like when we fight. It makes me afraid that we'll break up. and the last thing i need is to be a bassist without a band again. I mean god knows i cant go solo.
i dont know. im so confused. And i guess i have had too much time to think about stuff now, so im just getting paranoid. Anyways i cant think straight enough to write anymore. Ill continue this another time.
"hey good morning, how did you sleep?"
"good." Takes another bite of cereal.
not that i ever have, but its another reminder that im not in a movie. Things go wrong, people get hurt and confused, and sometimes the bad guys win. What does this really have to do with me? I honestly am having trouble producing an answer to that question in my mind.
Maybe its because i dont watch the news. The fucking SWAT team rolled into the old neighborhood Saturday and i knew nothing about that. My dad asked me if i read the paper tonight. I said to him without blinking, turning my head or changing the tone of my voice "not enough" like i actually have ever opened a paper to read it. the only thing i knwo that goes on around me is my band, my closest friends (which is how i found out about the SWAT team in the first place), my girl, and my parents.
(which reminds me, 10:30, gotta call the g/f)
Maybe its because in the past few weeks i have seen my girlfriend less and less. I mean everyone worries, but im not too worried about losing her. i just worry that one day ill never see her again for whatever reason. I just miss the hell out of her, shes cute, adorable, too fucking smart, and absolutely hopefully loves me. So it is taking some adjusting.
"i just feel like i have seen you less and less these past few weeks and it sucks"
"i know... i miss you"
and another small thing, i ended up not seeing her today and i was hoping to, so that kinda sucked.
Maybe its because i want my band to be okay. Marc and Eddie are in a fight, and it just sucks. Like, i dont like when we fight. It makes me afraid that we'll break up. and the last thing i need is to be a bassist without a band again. I mean god knows i cant go solo.
i dont know. im so confused. And i guess i have had too much time to think about stuff now, so im just getting paranoid. Anyways i cant think straight enough to write anymore. Ill continue this another time.