New Year. New Schmear.
This year has already started off with me putting the wrong footin a vat of acid and then walking on glass.
It begun with a big ole bloody mess of menstruation.
Still drunken-ness.
And an awkward retelling of events.
Then long line and crowded spaces.
Boring silences and heads of hash.
New years eve night was also brutal.
Stayed in, refused to go out and enjoyed the momentary solitude.
Got about 2 grams of weed for 9$.
Smoked too much Cali hash.
Drank too much Mothers Milk and Bubbly.
All of a sudden I began to have auditory hallucinations.
I couldnt remember what it was like to be human.
Thank god for Andrew and Eric.
Otherwise I'm pretty sure I would have jumped off the roof.
We had a cuddle puddle, and talked to Mike.
Which was so wonderful.
I'm pretty sure I would leave New Paltz right now if it wasnt for the people who live in that house, minus a few.
Things are still crazy and its only the 3rd.
I am so glad for Has and Annette.
The only people I can express everything and anything too.
Sometimes I notice I change completely depending on who is in the house.
Certain people walk in the room and chills of hatred run up my spine, and I begin to loathe every word that they say.
Other people walk in the room and I shut up, sit still, and pretend to be invisible.
Or I open up more, talk, smile and generally have a sunnier disposition.
Its weird.
People shouldnt affect me this much.
But they always have and always will.
BAH HUMBUGH.
Whatever.
I have $700 photo shoot this weekend.
What the fuck am I whining about.
xoxo
emmabellez
It begun with a big ole bloody mess of menstruation.
Still drunken-ness.
And an awkward retelling of events.
Then long line and crowded spaces.
Boring silences and heads of hash.
New years eve night was also brutal.
Stayed in, refused to go out and enjoyed the momentary solitude.
Got about 2 grams of weed for 9$.
Smoked too much Cali hash.
Drank too much Mothers Milk and Bubbly.
All of a sudden I began to have auditory hallucinations.
I couldnt remember what it was like to be human.
Thank god for Andrew and Eric.
Otherwise I'm pretty sure I would have jumped off the roof.
We had a cuddle puddle, and talked to Mike.
Which was so wonderful.
I'm pretty sure I would leave New Paltz right now if it wasnt for the people who live in that house, minus a few.
Things are still crazy and its only the 3rd.
I am so glad for Has and Annette.
The only people I can express everything and anything too.
Sometimes I notice I change completely depending on who is in the house.
Certain people walk in the room and chills of hatred run up my spine, and I begin to loathe every word that they say.
Other people walk in the room and I shut up, sit still, and pretend to be invisible.
Or I open up more, talk, smile and generally have a sunnier disposition.
Its weird.
People shouldnt affect me this much.
But they always have and always will.
BAH HUMBUGH.
Whatever.
I have $700 photo shoot this weekend.
What the fuck am I whining about.
xoxo
emmabellez