Trying to put thoughts together
Im amazed at how momentus a change college will be. I mean, you say it, you hear it, you think you know...but u dont. I did get a taste of it though. Last week i went to UT, and i want to a "prospective student" meeting for their engineering department. I read the brochures, i saw the presentation, i saw the wierd looking white momma's boys that want to grow up in a lab and be a chemical engineer. It then hit me as i was glancing at this cute girl a row behind me to my left that...i what i decide very soon will possibly influence what i do in 6 years. I for the first time saw myself as an adult! It was crazy!!! Seeing what i would be doing for 40 years to come! It was exciting, i got into it, i asked questions, read the brochures. It shined light on how insignificant high school "life" is, not the courses/teachers/experience learned, but how insignificant one little messup is, or how stupid you were for even wasting sleep over some dumb girl.
I dontk now what im saying, its difficult to explain. I know ive said "i want to get the fuck out of McAllen". and ive meant it, but ive never had real reason to leave. Being bored isnt that great of a reason. But now, i feel the need to leave, i feel ive exhausted all that mcallen has to offer me. That sounds bad, i wouldnt trade in any of my friends for a free ride to UT, but its i feel like there isnt anything else i want or need to experience here. But on that note, because McAllen isnt a very large place, and isnt as modern and up to date as some places makes me wonder if ill ever find my way back down here to help make mcallen a better place. to clear up traffic jams, to help make it structurally safer. Or maybe ill end up in another country/state/city/planet? haha...the possibilities are endless, and thats whats so motivating for me. I feel like i know what i want to do, and i feel like ill be not only satisfying myself, but helping my community.
But...on another note, i saw Clerks II. Its fucking awesome, but i suggest seeing Clerks (the first one) first. It helps develop the characters, which makes the jokes funnier, and a the love story greater. No matter how degratting this movie is to our society, EVERYONE needs to see it! It enhances what life is really like...and how people really are i think. But agree to disagree if you will.
Gah, senior year
buh-bye i love you
I dontk now what im saying, its difficult to explain. I know ive said "i want to get the fuck out of McAllen". and ive meant it, but ive never had real reason to leave. Being bored isnt that great of a reason. But now, i feel the need to leave, i feel ive exhausted all that mcallen has to offer me. That sounds bad, i wouldnt trade in any of my friends for a free ride to UT, but its i feel like there isnt anything else i want or need to experience here. But on that note, because McAllen isnt a very large place, and isnt as modern and up to date as some places makes me wonder if ill ever find my way back down here to help make mcallen a better place. to clear up traffic jams, to help make it structurally safer. Or maybe ill end up in another country/state/city/planet? haha...the possibilities are endless, and thats whats so motivating for me. I feel like i know what i want to do, and i feel like ill be not only satisfying myself, but helping my community.
But...on another note, i saw Clerks II. Its fucking awesome, but i suggest seeing Clerks (the first one) first. It helps develop the characters, which makes the jokes funnier, and a the love story greater. No matter how degratting this movie is to our society, EVERYONE needs to see it! It enhances what life is really like...and how people really are i think. But agree to disagree if you will.
Gah, senior year
buh-bye i love you